Ready, Set, Go
You can go through your whole life struggling to make connections. It can be difficult to know who to trust, how much to divulge or where the invisible line exists that acts as the cut off for pre-conceived notions of ‘unconditional understanding’ or ‘judgement free zones’; so, you keep people at arms-length, only ever revealing just enough.
It is an odd occurrence when someone can break through your safeguards and well-rehearsed bullshit. It is almost as if a curtain has been pulled, a veil lifted…and for just a minute, after some confusion, you can breathe. People are in love with fairytales and happy endings, do not get me wrong, I am one of them. Despite any cynicism I may have collected along the way I still root for the underdog. That is part of the problem though. Idealism. We fall in love with infatuation. We fall in love with love. It becomes more about what we fantasize could be than reality.
I think that is what sets real feelings apart from the fabricated ones though; a genuine and devoted interest in knowing what comes after the butterflies. I want to see every skeleton in the closet, the moments you are not proud of, the memories and missteps that took you to places other people sweep over and bury. I want to see and hear and feel every piece of yourself you loathe…because then I will have seen what comes after the credits. It is in that exact moment, when you see the worst behavior, the hurtful things, the questionable choices, the vulnerable fears…if you decide then that you want to stay, that is something real in a world of worthless encounters.
My eyes keep searching…my smile stays just beneath the surface…because in a city full of feigned smiles and miscommunication…when yours find mine there is not another face or sound for miles. Time stands still in the way it always does when you finally find something that feels like home. We can talk about anything and everything for hours. We can be obnoxious; we can be effortless…we can bicker and cool off…but at the end of the day no matter how much time we have invested…it is your hand I want to hold.
When you find something rare, when you find something tangible, you will either run toward it with wild abandon or run equally as fast away in fear.
Life is short honey, be careful which direction you choose.
It is an odd occurrence when someone can break through your safeguards and well-rehearsed bullshit. It is almost as if a curtain has been pulled, a veil lifted…and for just a minute, after some confusion, you can breathe. People are in love with fairytales and happy endings, do not get me wrong, I am one of them. Despite any cynicism I may have collected along the way I still root for the underdog. That is part of the problem though. Idealism. We fall in love with infatuation. We fall in love with love. It becomes more about what we fantasize could be than reality.
I think that is what sets real feelings apart from the fabricated ones though; a genuine and devoted interest in knowing what comes after the butterflies. I want to see every skeleton in the closet, the moments you are not proud of, the memories and missteps that took you to places other people sweep over and bury. I want to see and hear and feel every piece of yourself you loathe…because then I will have seen what comes after the credits. It is in that exact moment, when you see the worst behavior, the hurtful things, the questionable choices, the vulnerable fears…if you decide then that you want to stay, that is something real in a world of worthless encounters.
My eyes keep searching…my smile stays just beneath the surface…because in a city full of feigned smiles and miscommunication…when yours find mine there is not another face or sound for miles. Time stands still in the way it always does when you finally find something that feels like home. We can talk about anything and everything for hours. We can be obnoxious; we can be effortless…we can bicker and cool off…but at the end of the day no matter how much time we have invested…it is your hand I want to hold.
When you find something rare, when you find something tangible, you will either run toward it with wild abandon or run equally as fast away in fear.
Life is short honey, be careful which direction you choose.