the day, again--year 4.
Today marks 4 years ago when Kirsten passed away. That's weird, and what makes it more weird is the fact that today was the last time all of us would be together to remember her on this day. I know she was watching all of us, and has been every year on March 7th, when we all forget about who's friends with who and can just sit down, cook a nice dinner, and reminisce/catch up on things. I'm sure she's proud that we all are mature and are still having a good time and enjoying eachother's company. I think we are perfect. The ideal image of best friends who all went different ways (minus a few), but in the drop of a hat can reunite and act like we were just together yesterday, doing the same exact things we used to do. No awkwardness, none of that weird "catching up" fake conversation stuff, just straight, comfortable chemistry between everyone. On the more depressing side, I still can honestly say--I do not comprehend how we can all be left to finish highschool, go off to college, and start our lives, while out of that perfect group of 9, of all the people, she was the one who didn't get to make it to getting her license, graduating high school, or even being in higschool for that matter. The "original" group is even now...4 boys, and 4 girls...and I can honestly say, I've never been so unsatisfied with equality in my life.
Who would have thought, the end of highschool would be the one thing that would break down Nicole's emotional barrier and make her into one big ball of mushy sentimental cry-face-ness?
We decorated her memorial bench beautifully though, pink roses. Maybe I'll put up a pic later if I ever figure out how to do that crazy jpeg code or whatever it is, we shall see.
I think it's weird how girls come between stuff. Or guys for that matter. Even in the moment, if I ever catch myself even THINKING about letting a guy get in the way of my best friend...someone, slap me, and tell me to remember today and how heartbreaking it is to see two best friends since birth, not talking or acknowledging eachother. Thank god for maturity, however.
This is WAY too full of serious things, I don't like it. But I guess since I'm on a sort of depressing note, again, I'll add in the fact that my mom got me a book for christmas called, "Before You Go...". It's about oldest girls leaving their mommys for college, and how everyone copes with it. Written by a mom. So basically, it's one big mess and now sits on my nightstand, staring at me, and making me probably the most upset I could get (soberly atleast...hahaha)
bad joke. Sober emotions don't count?
Anyways, I'm absolutely exhausted.
GOODNIGHT!
Who would have thought, the end of highschool would be the one thing that would break down Nicole's emotional barrier and make her into one big ball of mushy sentimental cry-face-ness?
We decorated her memorial bench beautifully though, pink roses. Maybe I'll put up a pic later if I ever figure out how to do that crazy jpeg code or whatever it is, we shall see.
I think it's weird how girls come between stuff. Or guys for that matter. Even in the moment, if I ever catch myself even THINKING about letting a guy get in the way of my best friend...someone, slap me, and tell me to remember today and how heartbreaking it is to see two best friends since birth, not talking or acknowledging eachother. Thank god for maturity, however.
This is WAY too full of serious things, I don't like it. But I guess since I'm on a sort of depressing note, again, I'll add in the fact that my mom got me a book for christmas called, "Before You Go...". It's about oldest girls leaving their mommys for college, and how everyone copes with it. Written by a mom. So basically, it's one big mess and now sits on my nightstand, staring at me, and making me probably the most upset I could get (soberly atleast...hahaha)
bad joke. Sober emotions don't count?
Anyways, I'm absolutely exhausted.
GOODNIGHT!