Butterflies.
SO last night I had a dream... no not like Martin's... ::wink::
it was really weird (as most dreams usually are), but I'll j/ say the one significant part. I was sitting down and everyone was trying to catch this butterfly. When the butterfly got close to me I stuck my arm up (as if it was a hawk or some wild bird about to land on my arm). I was so terrified of it, and I LOVE butterflies. As the butterfly landed on my arm, I ran to the back door and shook it off to set it free because I thought it was going to bite me (apparently butterflie bite haha). Well the whole point is it reminded me of one of my favorite quotes by Nathaniel Hawthorne (sounding smart all of a sudden aren't I? ::wink::)
"Happiness is as a butterfly which, when pursued, is always beyond our grasp, but which, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you". At first I was really happy about it until I really looked into it and saw that my dream could have been telling me that happiness will come my way, but I'm going to be afraid it's going to "bite" me so I'm going to run and push it away...
So after I rolled out of bed I went to the kitchen and opened a fortune cookie b/c I felt like it was calling to me (I'm not crazy I swear haha). It was j/ sitting there all alone on the counter. The fortune said "You can only accomplish anything when you are honest and speak the truth"; and at that moment I remembered what Shannon was yelling at me about on the phone the other day. She told me that I'm so afraid of getting hurt that I'm not honest with myself or anyone else b/c of a fear of being vulnerable and putting myself out there. It pissed me off that she said that, but only because she was right. (("Call me when you're going out next or something" when I really meant "I want to see you again".))
Or maybe the dream didn't mean anything at all... maybe it j/ made it up as it went along without any meaning.... or maybe that was it's purpose. Either way I'm working on it, whatever "it" is.
it was really weird (as most dreams usually are), but I'll j/ say the one significant part. I was sitting down and everyone was trying to catch this butterfly. When the butterfly got close to me I stuck my arm up (as if it was a hawk or some wild bird about to land on my arm). I was so terrified of it, and I LOVE butterflies. As the butterfly landed on my arm, I ran to the back door and shook it off to set it free because I thought it was going to bite me (apparently butterflie bite haha). Well the whole point is it reminded me of one of my favorite quotes by Nathaniel Hawthorne (sounding smart all of a sudden aren't I? ::wink::)
"Happiness is as a butterfly which, when pursued, is always beyond our grasp, but which, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you". At first I was really happy about it until I really looked into it and saw that my dream could have been telling me that happiness will come my way, but I'm going to be afraid it's going to "bite" me so I'm going to run and push it away...
So after I rolled out of bed I went to the kitchen and opened a fortune cookie b/c I felt like it was calling to me (I'm not crazy I swear haha). It was j/ sitting there all alone on the counter. The fortune said "You can only accomplish anything when you are honest and speak the truth"; and at that moment I remembered what Shannon was yelling at me about on the phone the other day. She told me that I'm so afraid of getting hurt that I'm not honest with myself or anyone else b/c of a fear of being vulnerable and putting myself out there. It pissed me off that she said that, but only because she was right. (("Call me when you're going out next or something" when I really meant "I want to see you again".))
Or maybe the dream didn't mean anything at all... maybe it j/ made it up as it went along without any meaning.... or maybe that was it's purpose. Either way I'm working on it, whatever "it" is.