Wow
Well i know i should be really excited about prom right about now considering i have like 15 hours to go (which deep down im thrilled) but i just made a complete idiot of myself. You see, i like a challenge. This is a new discovery of mine though. Guys usually come to me, well recently i suppose. Never do i have to put much effort into, i dont know, winning them? This time its different, im impatient. He's not coming to me, so that leaves me with the challenge to, win him over, i guess you could call it. Last summer Matt tried to explain to me that the more i made him work for my attention or affection it made him want it more. So it seems to me that it is my turn to experience the whole 'the harder you must work, the more you want it'. Some how i think that this guy is the same way though, it seems as if he likes a challenge also, but i guess i just broke before him. I dont know. Im really lost. Tonight was very awkward (my fault) but i just get so anxious. He didnt even really say anything at all, making me feel even more stupid.
You know how something takes place and for the next like 5 hours you replay it over and over again in your head wishing and thinking of all that you had said or done and how it would of been different had you handled, said, done something differently? I dont know, im just analyzing things way to thoroughly. In conclusion to my little dilemma, im just going to back off for a bit. Guys love being teased, right?
Can i sell the sunrise in return for a sunset?
Try and feel, try and listen, try and think of what your missing..try and look into my eyes.