[Fanfic (Incomplete)] - óendurgoldin ást
Title: óendurgoldin ást
Author: nickyliicious
Characters/Pairings: A love complex that goes like this: Denmark ↔ Norway ← OC!Greenland ←Iceland, Sweden/Finland, OC!Åland, OC!Færoe.
Rating: PG13
Warnings: Awkward anatomy lessons and unexplicit sexuals themes and scenes
Summary: From Greenland's PoV. Greenland was found by Norway who took her to live with him and Iceland. She falls in love with Norway but before she can confess, a series of events change her until then peaceful life hurting her, making her fall apart and use Iceland, her best friend and confident, just to vent.
About the story: The title means 'Unrequited Love' in Icelandic, or so Google said. If it's not accurate, pease correct me. Every part or chapter, however you wish to see it, starts with an emo quote, the title and in smaller letters there's a name of the song and the artist. Why? Because either I was inspired by that song, I recomment listening to that song while reading, I was listening to that song while writing or I simply borrowed the title from that song.
___________________________________________
Before you read: I used the names of the characters in different languages. I think that you must already know but in case you don’t:
Norway:
Norge - in Norwegian, Danish, Greenlandic and Swedish
Denmark:
Danmark - in Danish, Norwegian and Swedish
Sweden:
Sverige - in Swedish, Danish, Greenlandic, Norwegian
Finland:
Suomi - in Finnish
Faeroe:
Færøyane - in Norwegian
Savalimmiut - in Greenlandic
References:
Kalmarunionen: Kalmar Union.
Founded by Queen Margaret I of Denmark, it was the period when the kingdoms of Denmark, Norway and Sweden (with Greenland, Iceland, Faeroe, Aland, Finland, Shetland and Orkney) unified. After Sweden got its independence, Denmark and Norway kept united which was the kingdom of Denmark-Norway.
Greenland, Iceland and Faeroe belonged to Norway, then to Denmark-Norway. But then there was a crisis and the king of Denmark was forced to give Norway to Sweden staying with the three of them. And that’s why Greenland and Faeroe now belong to Denmark.
_______________________________________________________
“Without love our life is ... a ship without a rudder ...
like a body without a soul.”
~Sholem Aleichem
~~~~
My precious one…
My beloved one.
No matter how many times I look into the past, I would still wonder how the affection turned into love and how love brought fear.
Fear of be forgotten. Fear of change.
Fear of changing the things that were perfect just the way they were. Probably that feeling was uneasiness. I was afraid of losing my perfect little world in which I would be happy with just watching in the distance.
Little did I know… I wasn’t the only one.
Now, this person stands before me.
A painkiller.
~*~
Genesis ~Everything starts with a Trinity~
Hasegawa Tomoki - Haru, Mankai no Sakura no Shita de
Cold
That was the first thing I felt. Even now I can’t remember from where I came from or how. I just did.
I can’t do anything about it now. But it’s not like it matters. I’m here.
White
Was everything I could see. White, bright landscape and icy stars falling from the sky. Dancing, dancing at the wind’s peace over andover
Him.
He was the first person I ever met. Golden velvet hair. White skin just as mine.
A beautiful person.
He covered me in his warm arms. I felt like I fit perfectly in them. He was gentle and caring. He was the one who gave me name.
I’m Greenland.
And he was Norway.
~**~
“A very small degree of hope is sufficient to cause the birth of love.”
~Stendhal
______
Condemned Memoir ~Happy memories just make it harder~
Lights - “Quiet”
He took me under his care. I have to say that those years, when it was just the three of us were the happiest of my life. The two of us and his little brother, a tsundere kind-of boy with silky silver hair who would become my precious friend. The first thing that attracted me were those deep, violet eyes of his like those I’ve never seen anywhere else even now. His name was Iceland, my playing partner.
Together we made a lot of trouble, small adventures of Viking wars and crusades which would lead me to become a tomboy. The thing we enjoyed the most was to sabotage real Viking basements, from mocking them to writing “Helga” on their axes and trying to pick a fight with drunk soldiers. We were quite handful for them. We always behaved when Norway was around and if he ever found a Viking bulling us he would immediately threaten him with sending him to my place, which no one wanted.
Suddenly, I started to feel changes. I was growing up different to the rest of these people. Norway told me that it was because I wasn’t a man but something called a “woman”. It took me a few years and several awkward anatomy lessons to get to know the difference between “men and women” and some other to learn what exactly happened when men and women get together, in other words, why babies came to the world.
“I swear I will never face that teacher ever again.”
Iceland just laughed, awkwardly. It wasn’t the best idea to have anatomy lessons together.
Naturally when you’re young you never realize that the happy time would ever finish until it does. And it was too late for me to get ready for that when we came to meet “Uncles” Sverige and Danmark.
Danmark.
---
Time of battles was the time I loved the most. Even when I was already a “young lady” I felt charmed by a certain warrior.
I liked to see big brother Norway going to battle. He was the most beautiful person for me. Then some other things started to change as well. Whenever I was with him I felt weird and my heart was pounding really hard. At first I thought I simply had caught Denmark’s stupid, but the more I read his cheesy stories the more I came to realize what it was:
The so-called love.
For Iceland the playing hours became training time. As for me, I would go to the garden, just to watch in silence. Stare at that person. He was usually reading a book, speaking with fairies or just taking fresh air.
From time to time he would notice my presence and invite me to join him. It was perfect. I was happy by just being by his side. It made me feel like I could forget everything else and just stay still forever. Hoping for my feelings to be conveyed someday.
Iceland of course noticed my feelings in no time. However, he didn’t say much, just supported me with cheering words and some advises which he admitted that couldn’t help much since he hadn’t have a successful romance himself.
“Don’t you mean ‘No romance at all’?”
“… just an unrequited one.”
“…
So you do love!”
~***~
“Hope is like a treasure that one cannot obtain or hold.”
~Sir Porokko
~~~~
Entwined ~Union~
Lacuna Coil - “Entwined”
Uncle Sverige was tall and looked strong, but his biggest characteristic was: He was freaking scary. He looked like a pervert stalker when it was about one of… these other people who would visit often along with him and Denmark, Suomi.
Everyone had a kind of “family”: Norway, Iceland and I; Sweden, Finland and Åland. However Denmark hadn’t anyone. Perhaps that’s the reason why he wanted to drag all the attention by being incredibly noisy.
As time passed by I came to realize that Norway had changed a bit as well but not with me nor with Iceland. It had to be with that big-mouthed jerk, Denmark. I realized the jealousy, I thought it was stupid but simply couldn’t help it. Big brother was Iceland’s and mine. Mine.
Visits from Denmark came more and more often and we went to visit him until finally there was an announcement that would change my, until then, happy life completely:
“What did you say?!”
“Just what you heard. My superior changed. Denmark and I are getting married.”
Just by listening to those words I felt like my whole world crumbled. But what hurt the most was that there was a glimpse of happiness in that impenetrable expressionless face of his. Just a small glimpse with the force of a thousand horses crushing against my heart.
I felt like I was breaking.
But not now.
“B- b- but… he is a he!!! Iceland, say something!”
He stood still.
“We’ve got nothing to do with it.”
There it goes. The last sparkle of hope, my best friend, just agreeing with it. I thought he supported me-...
“Traitor!”
He came closer and whispered softly, so Norway couldn’t listen: “He doesn’t love you.”
---
"If you don't love me, it does not matter, anyway I can love for both of us."
~Stendhal
---
I locked myself in my room for days unwilling to take any food until the day of moving. I looked like a corpse abut I kept rejecting food taking fresh water as the only source of nutrition. When we arrived Denmark’s eyes went wide open but kept himself of asking anything or joke about my condition, even though I knew how much I he wanted to do so. Norway’s glares are that powerful.
~****~
“Loving can cost a lot but not loving always
costs more, and those who fear to love often
find that want of love is an emptiness that robs
the joy from life.”
~Merle Shan
----
Synapse ~Clasped together~
Florence and The Machine - “Blinding” AND Blue Foundation - “Watch you Sleeping”
Days passed by. I finally gave up and decided to take some food. Not much, just the enough to keep me alive. I almost didn’t go out of my room. Curtains closed and the room in complete darkness. I spent most of the time sleeping, having some meals and recalling the bright days. It was like my whole life passed before my eyes.
Those sweet memories now were so sweet that they were sickly.
More days passed.
Finally one day, I found Iceland knocking into my door, bringing my daily doses of food. However, this time he actually made an attempt to have a talk. Naturally, I slammed the door in his face, but a sentence. Just an insignificant sentence could contain magic words I never thought I’d hear made me storm out of the room.
“We have a new little brother.”
---
I avoided looking into mirrors, but Denmark’s house would have 10 per hall, probably because of his alter ego. But thanks to that I realized that the best idea was to just look in the distance. After all, the poor kid would run away as fast as he could if he saw this pale, skinny, banshee kind-of-looking woman and even more if he knew that this was his elder sister. And actually I was so nervous that I didn’t know how I could react, especially if both Norway and Denmark were there.
Iceland, on the other hand, had other plans. While I stood behind a wall trying to hide myself of any other human being like a complete Hikikomori he just said out loud
“She’s here.”
Just how many times can a girl be betrayed by her best friend?!
That naturally made everyone put stunned faces like the complete retards they were but before they could even turn their heads I gained all my old athletic strength and was already about 100 meters away when suddenly a pole appeared out of nowhere. It completely ruined my poetic and melodramatic exit!!!
I don’t quite remember what happened after, my vision was literally screwed.
---
I woke up in an unfamiliar bed.
It was Iceland’s.
It was the very first time I had been in another room besides my own since I started to live here. His room was just as mine, but his was livelier, brighter and you could actually appreciate the luxurious structure, decoration and paintings, unlike mine which looked more like a lair instead of a room, it was actually the best place to put coffins.
Thanks to a storming headache I noticed some bandages. I stayed a long moment trying to recall how I got out of my room in the first place, long enough to make Ice start to worry. Then I remembered everything.
“Little Brother.”
“What?” Ice really looked concerned; perhaps he really thought the worst.
“Wh- what about little brother? Did anyone saw me? Please tell me they didn’t. Especially Norway… no, specially the kid whose name I don’t know-…”
“Færøyane.”
“What?”
“That’s his name. Probably you would simply like to call him Færoe. And no, I found you before. I brought you here quickly, you’re injured. I didn’t let anyone enter, they’re outside; I knew you wouldn’t want anyone to see you.”
“… I see, thank you. And… that’s a curious name, isn’t it?”
“Indeed.”
Svalimmiut… huh.
Iceland came closer, sitting on the bed and letting me rest in his chest. There was a big silence for a while. But it wasn’t uncomfortable, it was really nice. I noticed Iceland’s heart beating hard which made me turn to face him.
“Is there anything wrong?”
“I want to talk to you.” He said anxiously.
“I listen.”
“Why do you do this?”
“…What?”
“Don’t play dumb with me. You keep punishing yourself instead of just get over it. Isn’t big brother’s happiness enough to make you happy? Do you really think making everyone worry about you all day, every day will make you get your happy ending with Norway? Because I’m actually tired of watching everyone get close to the door every day just to see if you’re even alive; just to find you crying or screaming in nightmares. I’ve had it!”
Well, that really got me by surprise.
“Ice… wh- what… why...? What does it have to do with you anyway? Why do you even care, can’t you just simply ignore me, leave me alone?”
“Because for me, you’re more important than you can imagine,
and just standing there watching you destroy yourself without being able to do anything… it kills me.”
“Ice, I-”
Soft, surprisingly warm lips suddenly pressed against mine. They got more passionate by every second that passed and when I noticed I was doing the same.
“If your feelings aren’t meant to be conveyed... then I’ll take them”.
“Iceland…”
“If you have something you cannot hold, don’t hurt yourself. You can vent on me.”
…Ice… you…
---
"Our true passions are selfish."
~Stendhal
---
That night was the first time. Soft touches welcomed all the frustration I had been holding back. He was gentle, treated me like if I was some kind of delicate treasure. Those made me feel like if I was special to someone. It made me feel happy and alive again.
But there was something wrong with it. It made me feel guilty. I knew my caresses were meant for someone else, and so did he. But he didn’t mind. He welcomed them all as if they were meant for him only.
That only made it harder.
---
The next morning I was woken up by sweet kisses and soft caresses, Iceland was beside me.
I have to say that I felt better than I ever had since I could remember. I was no longer holding back anything, just breathing like a free person at last. But I did know it wouldn’t last long. A new thought crossed my mind:
“crap.”
“What’s wrong?”
“Ice… They were right outside this room last night”
“o- oh…Do you think they heard?”
*door opens*
“Ohh… trust me, we heard everything.” Said our favorite Cheshire Cat-smiled character.
Of all people in earth it had to be Denmark. Behind him there was Finland with a face that resembled a tomato and Åland pretty much in the same state.
“Hmm~ since you became anorexic I thought you were like a skeleton but you do have some body!”
“Where’s Norway… did- did he also heard?” I asked nervously
“Ah! No, he didn’t. He decided to look after Færoe while Iceland decided to open the door, he’s probably sleeping. As for Sweden… he decided to stay out of this since the moans started. I’m sorry we didn’t give you some privacy but you don’t get the chance to see a living banshee everyday you know? Besides, we haven’t spent ANY time together, so I thought that since you’re out of your room it was the perfect chance to have some chat. Same goes for Finland.”
“Well then, state your business. I’m all ears.”
“Try to be a little more sociable!”
~*****~
“Friendship has its illusions no less than love.”
~Stendhal
----
Paradox ~Dilema~
All Time Low - “Painting Flowers”
In the end, Denmark convinced me to promise to talk with him after letting me get some privacy to find where my clothes were. He is vexatious so it was to be expected.
I hadn’t seen Norway at all and I was glad for it. But just to make sure I asked Denmark to talk in the garden. Bad idea. The sun almost burned my eyes and it was awfully painful to the point that tears started falling. Damn that Cheshire Cat and his cheerfully nice weather.
The conversation started smoothly; short arguments, short questions and short answers. I have to say that it could be actually pretty comfortable to talk with him. He’s not a bad person, just hard to get along with. We talked about so many things; from childhood tales to bloody battles chronicles until we finally got to the Norway topic.
“So it was quite surprising to hear that you actually felt that way about Norge. If he was there, I bet we could have witnessed a once-in-a-life ‘What the Hell?!’ expression from him.”
“What is so special about it?”
“Well, you know… the thing is that we actually thought you liked Iceland”
“What?”
“Y-yeah! Because, you guys looked so close and cute together and stuff, you know.”
“We do?”
“Yep. But if he isn’t the one you like, then… why did-?”
“I know what you mean. And don’t you think I don’t feel like a complete rogue because I do. Is just…”
“You needed to let it out. In the end, he was the one who asked for it. Also, I think Iceland is big enough to not ge the wrong idea and I know I’m not the most moral person, but… if I say it’s wrong, it’s wrong.”
“Hearing that from you just makes me consider doing it again.”
“How mean! You know I’m serious~”
---
We must’ve spent hours talking judging by the sky. We sat under a tree. He actually was a nice shoulder to cry on.
But he made me realize something; I was confused. I was stuck between a complete cliché romance novel: Between the man I always loved and my best friend. Oh! How cruel destiny! YOU’RE A NOONSENSE!
“Well, I can’t believe I’m actually saying this but it was fun to talk with you.”
“Awwn~ does that means you love me?”
“No.”
“Ah, well at least I tried! Anyway, I can see you do have true feelings. Just not clear, but let me tell you something: I’M NOT GIVING NORGE TO YOU. He is MMMIIIIINNNNEEEEE! Because, I love him more that you’ll ever get to.”
“Hmmm… we’ll see…”
“Ah! Btw, since now you look more human, would you like to meet my cute child?”
“Who?”
“The reason of why all this happened: Færoe!”
Ugghhh…
~******~
“Sometimes it's the smallest decisions that can change your life forever.”
~Keri Russell
--------
Reunion ~Unite again~
Acceptance - “So Contagiously”
I agreed to start at least with having dinner with everyone. Norway was quite surprised or so it seemed so I supposed he knew nothing yet and I felt really relieved. That day I met Færoe, and just like Denmark said, he was cute. No, more than cute, he was adorable, beautiful. He resembled Denmark and Norway in every aspect which was the best combination (because even if it hurts to admit, Denmark is beautiful). He had blonde hair just like both of them and green eyes, unlike my deep black hair and sky blue eyes, but he had ivory skin just like mine.
Despite my anorexic look, the child seemed to like me, or at the very least he didn’t cry.
Everyone tried to act like nothing happened, at least not in front of Norway. However, when we had visits, I could feel a few stares here and there from Sweden and Finland while Åland tried to avoid any contact with me and forget anything happened which I thanked.
---
As if destiny loved to bitch with me or at least didn’t want me to live in peace, I received another wonderful new:
Kalmarunionen.
---
“We. Are. WHAT?!” The surprises have never been my forte, specially the undesired ones.
“Just what you heard, making a union. Sweden, Finland and Åland are moving here.”
How I hate that he can say everything without a glimpse of worry in his face.
“No, I think she meant: ‘why?’.”
“You know, our superior has become Sweden’s so you can pretty much imagine.”
Another union. Great.
“Are you saying all of us are getting married with each other and have a massive orgy?!”
Iceland made a small laugh. Denmark howled. Norway just gave me an icy look. Of course, I evaded it.
“Or is it just a threesome?”
“I have had it. You’re going to behave. And you’re dealing with it like it or not, I don’t care if you self-arrest yourself in your room for the rest of your life but you’re dealing with it. You have no choice; you’re my territory in case you have forgotten.”
Yes. I was his territory.
I tried to ignore the compassive looks from Denmark and Iceland. I didn’t need them; I was fine, just fine, perfectly fine.
“Good. If that’s what you want, go ahead and do as you please. But don’t get me involved when all of this ends up wrong. You know no country can make a big union without any disaster.”
And just like I predicted, it was a BAD idea. I already knew that Sweden and Denmark couldn’t get along but this was too much. They beat each other like if there was no tomorrow and there wouldn’t be a tomorrow if Norway and Finland didn’t stop them. No matter how much any of them had hoped to unite and become a great nation that could conquer Europe, those days were living hell.
Denmark and Sweden were way too different. For example: Whenever they decided to make me miserable, in other words, when Denmark and Norway slept together, the poor us would have to deal with all those moans and screams. I looked like a jungle, wild beasts dealing with each other. As for Sweden, he could barely speak a word with Finland and Finland was completely oblivious of his feelings.
Every day was pretty much the same thing; those giants would beat each other, Norway and Finland were too busy treating their wounds. I’d say Iceland, Åland, Færoe and I got closer. Færoe had grown up really fast, now he looked just as grown up as Åland and Iceland. But he was still a child, and so was Åland so our responsibility, Iceland’s and mine was to find a safe place to hide during fights to avoid getting involved.
---
In the end, an atmosphere of relief was established. The union was dissolved. Sweden and Finland left and even though they took Åland with them, we knew it was the best because they were better off on their own. They always had. Besides, Sweden wasn’t a bad person so we knew he was going to be safe.
So it was the five of us again.
T O B E C O N T I N U E D
________________________________
Author’s Note: Now, this was… my first fanfic, not EVER, but it is the first Hetalia-based. Is not so good but ughhh… (HELLO! I’m 14! And I basically learned English on my own) but I REALLY wanted to give it a shot since I already became Greenland’s (specially fem!) fan and I’ve found no fanfic focused on her (or him).
Also, another motivation was a little chat in Bijouo0oPanda’s friending meme where we mentioned the topic. However, I’d rather her not to even know about the existence of this because having one of your greatest friends reading something lame you wrote is not cool :/
Comments? Advices? Suggestions? Highly appreciated.
Off-Topic Author Note: While I was writing the third part of “Synapse” I was on a chat in messenger with my RL friend, Anna and this is what she wrote:
(: •#Aппα•#•$7♥I was Dreαmiing αwαy wiishiing thαt heroes but U'r dαngerous&I'm Loving It•$14♪•$0 dice:
That completely ruined my dramatic atmosphere.
----
Author: nickyliicious
Characters/Pairings: A love complex that goes like this: Denmark ↔ Norway ← OC!Greenland ←Iceland, Sweden/Finland, OC!Åland, OC!Færoe.
Rating: PG13
Warnings: Awkward anatomy lessons and unexplicit sexuals themes and scenes
Summary: From Greenland's PoV. Greenland was found by Norway who took her to live with him and Iceland. She falls in love with Norway but before she can confess, a series of events change her until then peaceful life hurting her, making her fall apart and use Iceland, her best friend and confident, just to vent.
About the story: The title means 'Unrequited Love' in Icelandic, or so Google said. If it's not accurate, pease correct me. Every part or chapter, however you wish to see it, starts with an emo quote, the title and in smaller letters there's a name of the song and the artist. Why? Because either I was inspired by that song, I recomment listening to that song while reading, I was listening to that song while writing or I simply borrowed the title from that song.
___________________________________________
Before you read: I used the names of the characters in different languages. I think that you must already know but in case you don’t:
Norway:
Norge - in Norwegian, Danish, Greenlandic and Swedish
Denmark:
Danmark - in Danish, Norwegian and Swedish
Sweden:
Sverige - in Swedish, Danish, Greenlandic, Norwegian
Finland:
Suomi - in Finnish
Faeroe:
Færøyane - in Norwegian
Savalimmiut - in Greenlandic
References:
Kalmarunionen: Kalmar Union.
Founded by Queen Margaret I of Denmark, it was the period when the kingdoms of Denmark, Norway and Sweden (with Greenland, Iceland, Faeroe, Aland, Finland, Shetland and Orkney) unified. After Sweden got its independence, Denmark and Norway kept united which was the kingdom of Denmark-Norway.
Greenland, Iceland and Faeroe belonged to Norway, then to Denmark-Norway. But then there was a crisis and the king of Denmark was forced to give Norway to Sweden staying with the three of them. And that’s why Greenland and Faeroe now belong to Denmark.
_______________________________________________________
“Without love our life is ... a ship without a rudder ...
like a body without a soul.”
~Sholem Aleichem
~~~~
My precious one…
My beloved one.
No matter how many times I look into the past, I would still wonder how the affection turned into love and how love brought fear.
Fear of be forgotten. Fear of change.
Fear of changing the things that were perfect just the way they were. Probably that feeling was uneasiness. I was afraid of losing my perfect little world in which I would be happy with just watching in the distance.
Little did I know… I wasn’t the only one.
Now, this person stands before me.
A painkiller.
~*~
Genesis ~Everything starts with a Trinity~
Hasegawa Tomoki - Haru, Mankai no Sakura no Shita de
Cold
That was the first thing I felt. Even now I can’t remember from where I came from or how. I just did.
I can’t do anything about it now. But it’s not like it matters. I’m here.
White
Was everything I could see. White, bright landscape and icy stars falling from the sky. Dancing, dancing at the wind’s peace over andover
Him.
He was the first person I ever met. Golden velvet hair. White skin just as mine.
A beautiful person.
He covered me in his warm arms. I felt like I fit perfectly in them. He was gentle and caring. He was the one who gave me name.
I’m Greenland.
And he was Norway.
~**~
“A very small degree of hope is sufficient to cause the birth of love.”
~Stendhal
______
Condemned Memoir ~Happy memories just make it harder~
Lights - “Quiet”
He took me under his care. I have to say that those years, when it was just the three of us were the happiest of my life. The two of us and his little brother, a tsundere kind-of boy with silky silver hair who would become my precious friend. The first thing that attracted me were those deep, violet eyes of his like those I’ve never seen anywhere else even now. His name was Iceland, my playing partner.
Together we made a lot of trouble, small adventures of Viking wars and crusades which would lead me to become a tomboy. The thing we enjoyed the most was to sabotage real Viking basements, from mocking them to writing “Helga” on their axes and trying to pick a fight with drunk soldiers. We were quite handful for them. We always behaved when Norway was around and if he ever found a Viking bulling us he would immediately threaten him with sending him to my place, which no one wanted.
Suddenly, I started to feel changes. I was growing up different to the rest of these people. Norway told me that it was because I wasn’t a man but something called a “woman”. It took me a few years and several awkward anatomy lessons to get to know the difference between “men and women” and some other to learn what exactly happened when men and women get together, in other words, why babies came to the world.
“I swear I will never face that teacher ever again.”
Iceland just laughed, awkwardly. It wasn’t the best idea to have anatomy lessons together.
Naturally when you’re young you never realize that the happy time would ever finish until it does. And it was too late for me to get ready for that when we came to meet “Uncles” Sverige and Danmark.
Danmark.
---
Time of battles was the time I loved the most. Even when I was already a “young lady” I felt charmed by a certain warrior.
I liked to see big brother Norway going to battle. He was the most beautiful person for me. Then some other things started to change as well. Whenever I was with him I felt weird and my heart was pounding really hard. At first I thought I simply had caught Denmark’s stupid, but the more I read his cheesy stories the more I came to realize what it was:
The so-called love.
For Iceland the playing hours became training time. As for me, I would go to the garden, just to watch in silence. Stare at that person. He was usually reading a book, speaking with fairies or just taking fresh air.
From time to time he would notice my presence and invite me to join him. It was perfect. I was happy by just being by his side. It made me feel like I could forget everything else and just stay still forever. Hoping for my feelings to be conveyed someday.
Iceland of course noticed my feelings in no time. However, he didn’t say much, just supported me with cheering words and some advises which he admitted that couldn’t help much since he hadn’t have a successful romance himself.
“Don’t you mean ‘No romance at all’?”
“… just an unrequited one.”
“…
So you do love!”
~***~
“Hope is like a treasure that one cannot obtain or hold.”
~Sir Porokko
~~~~
Entwined ~Union~
Lacuna Coil - “Entwined”
Uncle Sverige was tall and looked strong, but his biggest characteristic was: He was freaking scary. He looked like a pervert stalker when it was about one of… these other people who would visit often along with him and Denmark, Suomi.
Everyone had a kind of “family”: Norway, Iceland and I; Sweden, Finland and Åland. However Denmark hadn’t anyone. Perhaps that’s the reason why he wanted to drag all the attention by being incredibly noisy.
As time passed by I came to realize that Norway had changed a bit as well but not with me nor with Iceland. It had to be with that big-mouthed jerk, Denmark. I realized the jealousy, I thought it was stupid but simply couldn’t help it. Big brother was Iceland’s and mine. Mine.
Visits from Denmark came more and more often and we went to visit him until finally there was an announcement that would change my, until then, happy life completely:
“What did you say?!”
“Just what you heard. My superior changed. Denmark and I are getting married.”
Just by listening to those words I felt like my whole world crumbled. But what hurt the most was that there was a glimpse of happiness in that impenetrable expressionless face of his. Just a small glimpse with the force of a thousand horses crushing against my heart.
I felt like I was breaking.
But not now.
“B- b- but… he is a he!!! Iceland, say something!”
He stood still.
“We’ve got nothing to do with it.”
There it goes. The last sparkle of hope, my best friend, just agreeing with it. I thought he supported me-...
“Traitor!”
He came closer and whispered softly, so Norway couldn’t listen: “He doesn’t love you.”
---
"If you don't love me, it does not matter, anyway I can love for both of us."
~Stendhal
---
I locked myself in my room for days unwilling to take any food until the day of moving. I looked like a corpse abut I kept rejecting food taking fresh water as the only source of nutrition. When we arrived Denmark’s eyes went wide open but kept himself of asking anything or joke about my condition, even though I knew how much I he wanted to do so. Norway’s glares are that powerful.
~****~
“Loving can cost a lot but not loving always
costs more, and those who fear to love often
find that want of love is an emptiness that robs
the joy from life.”
~Merle Shan
----
Synapse ~Clasped together~
Florence and The Machine - “Blinding” AND Blue Foundation - “Watch you Sleeping”
Days passed by. I finally gave up and decided to take some food. Not much, just the enough to keep me alive. I almost didn’t go out of my room. Curtains closed and the room in complete darkness. I spent most of the time sleeping, having some meals and recalling the bright days. It was like my whole life passed before my eyes.
Those sweet memories now were so sweet that they were sickly.
More days passed.
Finally one day, I found Iceland knocking into my door, bringing my daily doses of food. However, this time he actually made an attempt to have a talk. Naturally, I slammed the door in his face, but a sentence. Just an insignificant sentence could contain magic words I never thought I’d hear made me storm out of the room.
“We have a new little brother.”
---
I avoided looking into mirrors, but Denmark’s house would have 10 per hall, probably because of his alter ego. But thanks to that I realized that the best idea was to just look in the distance. After all, the poor kid would run away as fast as he could if he saw this pale, skinny, banshee kind-of-looking woman and even more if he knew that this was his elder sister. And actually I was so nervous that I didn’t know how I could react, especially if both Norway and Denmark were there.
Iceland, on the other hand, had other plans. While I stood behind a wall trying to hide myself of any other human being like a complete Hikikomori he just said out loud
“She’s here.”
Just how many times can a girl be betrayed by her best friend?!
That naturally made everyone put stunned faces like the complete retards they were but before they could even turn their heads I gained all my old athletic strength and was already about 100 meters away when suddenly a pole appeared out of nowhere. It completely ruined my poetic and melodramatic exit!!!
I don’t quite remember what happened after, my vision was literally screwed.
---
I woke up in an unfamiliar bed.
It was Iceland’s.
It was the very first time I had been in another room besides my own since I started to live here. His room was just as mine, but his was livelier, brighter and you could actually appreciate the luxurious structure, decoration and paintings, unlike mine which looked more like a lair instead of a room, it was actually the best place to put coffins.
Thanks to a storming headache I noticed some bandages. I stayed a long moment trying to recall how I got out of my room in the first place, long enough to make Ice start to worry. Then I remembered everything.
“Little Brother.”
“What?” Ice really looked concerned; perhaps he really thought the worst.
“Wh- what about little brother? Did anyone saw me? Please tell me they didn’t. Especially Norway… no, specially the kid whose name I don’t know-…”
“Færøyane.”
“What?”
“That’s his name. Probably you would simply like to call him Færoe. And no, I found you before. I brought you here quickly, you’re injured. I didn’t let anyone enter, they’re outside; I knew you wouldn’t want anyone to see you.”
“… I see, thank you. And… that’s a curious name, isn’t it?”
“Indeed.”
Svalimmiut… huh.
Iceland came closer, sitting on the bed and letting me rest in his chest. There was a big silence for a while. But it wasn’t uncomfortable, it was really nice. I noticed Iceland’s heart beating hard which made me turn to face him.
“Is there anything wrong?”
“I want to talk to you.” He said anxiously.
“I listen.”
“Why do you do this?”
“…What?”
“Don’t play dumb with me. You keep punishing yourself instead of just get over it. Isn’t big brother’s happiness enough to make you happy? Do you really think making everyone worry about you all day, every day will make you get your happy ending with Norway? Because I’m actually tired of watching everyone get close to the door every day just to see if you’re even alive; just to find you crying or screaming in nightmares. I’ve had it!”
Well, that really got me by surprise.
“Ice… wh- what… why...? What does it have to do with you anyway? Why do you even care, can’t you just simply ignore me, leave me alone?”
“Because for me, you’re more important than you can imagine,
and just standing there watching you destroy yourself without being able to do anything… it kills me.”
“Ice, I-”
Soft, surprisingly warm lips suddenly pressed against mine. They got more passionate by every second that passed and when I noticed I was doing the same.
“If your feelings aren’t meant to be conveyed... then I’ll take them”.
“Iceland…”
“If you have something you cannot hold, don’t hurt yourself. You can vent on me.”
…Ice… you…
---
"Our true passions are selfish."
~Stendhal
---
That night was the first time. Soft touches welcomed all the frustration I had been holding back. He was gentle, treated me like if I was some kind of delicate treasure. Those made me feel like if I was special to someone. It made me feel happy and alive again.
But there was something wrong with it. It made me feel guilty. I knew my caresses were meant for someone else, and so did he. But he didn’t mind. He welcomed them all as if they were meant for him only.
That only made it harder.
---
The next morning I was woken up by sweet kisses and soft caresses, Iceland was beside me.
I have to say that I felt better than I ever had since I could remember. I was no longer holding back anything, just breathing like a free person at last. But I did know it wouldn’t last long. A new thought crossed my mind:
“crap.”
“What’s wrong?”
“Ice… They were right outside this room last night”
“o- oh…Do you think they heard?”
*door opens*
“Ohh… trust me, we heard everything.” Said our favorite Cheshire Cat-smiled character.
Of all people in earth it had to be Denmark. Behind him there was Finland with a face that resembled a tomato and Åland pretty much in the same state.
“Hmm~ since you became anorexic I thought you were like a skeleton but you do have some body!”
“Where’s Norway… did- did he also heard?” I asked nervously
“Ah! No, he didn’t. He decided to look after Færoe while Iceland decided to open the door, he’s probably sleeping. As for Sweden… he decided to stay out of this since the moans started. I’m sorry we didn’t give you some privacy but you don’t get the chance to see a living banshee everyday you know? Besides, we haven’t spent ANY time together, so I thought that since you’re out of your room it was the perfect chance to have some chat. Same goes for Finland.”
“Well then, state your business. I’m all ears.”
“Try to be a little more sociable!”
~*****~
“Friendship has its illusions no less than love.”
~Stendhal
----
Paradox ~Dilema~
All Time Low - “Painting Flowers”
In the end, Denmark convinced me to promise to talk with him after letting me get some privacy to find where my clothes were. He is vexatious so it was to be expected.
I hadn’t seen Norway at all and I was glad for it. But just to make sure I asked Denmark to talk in the garden. Bad idea. The sun almost burned my eyes and it was awfully painful to the point that tears started falling. Damn that Cheshire Cat and his cheerfully nice weather.
The conversation started smoothly; short arguments, short questions and short answers. I have to say that it could be actually pretty comfortable to talk with him. He’s not a bad person, just hard to get along with. We talked about so many things; from childhood tales to bloody battles chronicles until we finally got to the Norway topic.
“So it was quite surprising to hear that you actually felt that way about Norge. If he was there, I bet we could have witnessed a once-in-a-life ‘What the Hell?!’ expression from him.”
“What is so special about it?”
“Well, you know… the thing is that we actually thought you liked Iceland”
“What?”
“Y-yeah! Because, you guys looked so close and cute together and stuff, you know.”
“We do?”
“Yep. But if he isn’t the one you like, then… why did-?”
“I know what you mean. And don’t you think I don’t feel like a complete rogue because I do. Is just…”
“You needed to let it out. In the end, he was the one who asked for it. Also, I think Iceland is big enough to not ge the wrong idea and I know I’m not the most moral person, but… if I say it’s wrong, it’s wrong.”
“Hearing that from you just makes me consider doing it again.”
“How mean! You know I’m serious~”
---
We must’ve spent hours talking judging by the sky. We sat under a tree. He actually was a nice shoulder to cry on.
But he made me realize something; I was confused. I was stuck between a complete cliché romance novel: Between the man I always loved and my best friend. Oh! How cruel destiny! YOU’RE A NOONSENSE!
“Well, I can’t believe I’m actually saying this but it was fun to talk with you.”
“Awwn~ does that means you love me?”
“No.”
“Ah, well at least I tried! Anyway, I can see you do have true feelings. Just not clear, but let me tell you something: I’M NOT GIVING NORGE TO YOU. He is MMMIIIIINNNNEEEEE! Because, I love him more that you’ll ever get to.”
“Hmmm… we’ll see…”
“Ah! Btw, since now you look more human, would you like to meet my cute child?”
“Who?”
“The reason of why all this happened: Færoe!”
Ugghhh…
~******~
“Sometimes it's the smallest decisions that can change your life forever.”
~Keri Russell
--------
Reunion ~Unite again~
Acceptance - “So Contagiously”
I agreed to start at least with having dinner with everyone. Norway was quite surprised or so it seemed so I supposed he knew nothing yet and I felt really relieved. That day I met Færoe, and just like Denmark said, he was cute. No, more than cute, he was adorable, beautiful. He resembled Denmark and Norway in every aspect which was the best combination (because even if it hurts to admit, Denmark is beautiful). He had blonde hair just like both of them and green eyes, unlike my deep black hair and sky blue eyes, but he had ivory skin just like mine.
Despite my anorexic look, the child seemed to like me, or at the very least he didn’t cry.
Everyone tried to act like nothing happened, at least not in front of Norway. However, when we had visits, I could feel a few stares here and there from Sweden and Finland while Åland tried to avoid any contact with me and forget anything happened which I thanked.
---
As if destiny loved to bitch with me or at least didn’t want me to live in peace, I received another wonderful new:
Kalmarunionen.
---
“We. Are. WHAT?!” The surprises have never been my forte, specially the undesired ones.
“Just what you heard, making a union. Sweden, Finland and Åland are moving here.”
How I hate that he can say everything without a glimpse of worry in his face.
“No, I think she meant: ‘why?’.”
“You know, our superior has become Sweden’s so you can pretty much imagine.”
Another union. Great.
“Are you saying all of us are getting married with each other and have a massive orgy?!”
Iceland made a small laugh. Denmark howled. Norway just gave me an icy look. Of course, I evaded it.
“Or is it just a threesome?”
“I have had it. You’re going to behave. And you’re dealing with it like it or not, I don’t care if you self-arrest yourself in your room for the rest of your life but you’re dealing with it. You have no choice; you’re my territory in case you have forgotten.”
Yes. I was his territory.
I tried to ignore the compassive looks from Denmark and Iceland. I didn’t need them; I was fine, just fine, perfectly fine.
“Good. If that’s what you want, go ahead and do as you please. But don’t get me involved when all of this ends up wrong. You know no country can make a big union without any disaster.”
And just like I predicted, it was a BAD idea. I already knew that Sweden and Denmark couldn’t get along but this was too much. They beat each other like if there was no tomorrow and there wouldn’t be a tomorrow if Norway and Finland didn’t stop them. No matter how much any of them had hoped to unite and become a great nation that could conquer Europe, those days were living hell.
Denmark and Sweden were way too different. For example: Whenever they decided to make me miserable, in other words, when Denmark and Norway slept together, the poor us would have to deal with all those moans and screams. I looked like a jungle, wild beasts dealing with each other. As for Sweden, he could barely speak a word with Finland and Finland was completely oblivious of his feelings.
Every day was pretty much the same thing; those giants would beat each other, Norway and Finland were too busy treating their wounds. I’d say Iceland, Åland, Færoe and I got closer. Færoe had grown up really fast, now he looked just as grown up as Åland and Iceland. But he was still a child, and so was Åland so our responsibility, Iceland’s and mine was to find a safe place to hide during fights to avoid getting involved.
---
In the end, an atmosphere of relief was established. The union was dissolved. Sweden and Finland left and even though they took Åland with them, we knew it was the best because they were better off on their own. They always had. Besides, Sweden wasn’t a bad person so we knew he was going to be safe.
So it was the five of us again.
T O B E C O N T I N U E D
________________________________
Author’s Note: Now, this was… my first fanfic, not EVER, but it is the first Hetalia-based. Is not so good but ughhh… (HELLO! I’m 14! And I basically learned English on my own) but I REALLY wanted to give it a shot since I already became Greenland’s (specially fem!) fan and I’ve found no fanfic focused on her (or him).
Also, another motivation was a little chat in Bijouo0oPanda’s friending meme where we mentioned the topic. However, I’d rather her not to even know about the existence of this because having one of your greatest friends reading something lame you wrote is not cool :/
Comments? Advices? Suggestions? Highly appreciated.
Off-Topic Author Note: While I was writing the third part of “Synapse” I was on a chat in messenger with my RL friend, Anna and this is what she wrote:
(: •#Aппα•#•$7♥I was Dreαmiing αwαy wiishiing thαt heroes but U'r dαngerous&I'm Loving It•$14♪•$0 dice:
- What starts with P and ends with ORN? . . . . . . . YES! YOU'RE RIGHT! It's Popcorn! xD
- Wahahahahaha
That completely ruined my dramatic atmosphere.
----