(no subject)

Aug 09, 2003 15:56

Does emilehirsch think that I would ever add him back, you the most horrible person alive and it would make my day if you would delete and never come back, and a hoe is a garden tool dipshit. I feel so sorry for Elisha having to make a movie with you, you are also hideous looking, and you are an independent film actor because you suck and can't get any better. Now excuse me while I go find a cowboy hat for Avril's Woody costume.

A few days ago I realized something, that I had discovered a new feeling for a certain person, and this person was Emmanuelle. I realized that I hadn't been in love with her for a while now, but that I loved her, in the same way that I love Dan or Tyson. When we broke up last time she wasn't so upset, but I noticed that last time she had someone to rebound to pretty fucking quick, and this time, she doesn't. I know I broke her heart but she has broken mine before. She is one of my best friends and I don't want to exclude her from being a part of my life but until we can come to feel the same about each other I think it would be rather difficult to be together. We were dating for four months and have many great memories, but that's just what they are, memories, a thing of the past. She's a great person, she always makes me smile. She's a great friend of mine. Yet, I wasn't happy, and it's not a matter of her not making me happy because she does but it was something else and I knew that breaking up was the best thing because I can't be in a relationship if my heart isn't in the right place. But when we were together practically every second I was with her, talking to her, thinking about her, wanting to be with her. She was the first person I ever felt she loved me for who I was and not who they thought I was or wanted me to be. She was my first love. That love where you know it'll still always be there, but you need to get over. And it's extremely hard to do so. I don't know if I'll ever be over it for good. But I do know that because of her, I'm a better person. And that's all I could ever ask for, because I do still love her and I want nothing more than for her to be happy.
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