GYM CLASS BEGAN FIVE MINUTES AGO, MAGGOTS.
** GAI SENSEI IS IN THE GYM, HOLDING A CLIPBOARD AND A STOPWATCH, WEARING A WHISTLE AROUND HIS NECK, OVER THIS: **
ALRIGHT YOU FILTHY ANIMALS, LINE UP!
I'm going to tell you how this is going to happen. You will listen QUIETLY and RESPECTFULLY until I am finished, and then I will take NO MORE THAN FIVE QUESTIONS, because I KNOW you little shits will no doubt want to whine and complain about our new regime change and the effects it will have on gym class.
NOW, AS YOU KNOW Orochimaru-sama is our new principal. He and I had a DISCUSSION about the teaching methods in practice at NINJA Highschool and came to an agreement that there needed to be some SEVERE policy changes around here:
ONE: There will be MANDITORY UNIFORMS. You will purchase one from the school store for $40. This uniform must be worn during gym class. If you arrive to class dressed in anything but the sanctioned attire, you will have DETENTION and a note sent home to your parents.
TWO: It has come to my attention that the SPORTS TEAMS have been poorly organized up until this point. From now on:
BASEBALL practice will take place on Mondays from 3PM-7PM.
FOOTBALL practice will take place on Tuesdays from 3PM-7PM.
BASKETBALL practice will take place on Wednesdays from 3PM-7PM.
CROSS-COUNTRY practice will take place on Thursdays from 3PM-7PM.
SWIMMING practice will take place on Fridays from 3PM-7PM.
GYMNASTICS practice will take place on Saturday from 3PM-7PM.
ON SUNDAY... you little wimps can rest.
THREE: There will be NO FIGHTING during COMPETITION SPORTS. Foul play will NOT be tolerated. If any of you dipshits are caught fighting within the sanctuary of the gym again you will be SENT TO THE PRINCIPAL'S OFFICE for a punishment deemed fitting for your transgression by Orochimaru-sama. In the case of the wrestling and martial arts portions of the curriculum, fighting will be strictly monitored and structured, and foul play/cheating/bringing personal conflict into the classroom will be punishible at my discretion.
SAVE THE DRAMA FOR YOUR MAMA, GYM CLASS IS SERIOUS BUSINESS.
FOUR: TARDINESS WILL NOT BE TOLERATED.
FIVE: Unless I recieve a note from BOTH your doctor AND your parents (In Deidara-kun's case, his parole officer) offering a SUITABLE and SUFFICIENT REASON for you to be allowed not to participate in gym class, and that reason is approved by Orochimaru-sama, PAERICIPATION IN ALL ACTIVITIES IS MANDATORY.
In addition, more rules and regulations may be implemented in the future if Orochimaru-sama deems it necessary.
ALRIGHT YOU BRATS, YOU HAVE FIVE QUESTIONS: USE THEM WISELY.
THEN, WE BEGIN WARM-UPS.
Lee-kun, we need to talk about your training.