Blaine Larsen
Ok I know three times in one day is a bit much. . . well deal with it, this is a way for me to vent, share my feelings and express excitement, plus this really isn't for anyone but me, u who read it just get the privelage of seeing what I put down. So I was watching music videos on CMT, yea yea yea country, I know, and I saw the video for How do you Get That Lonely, by Blaine Larsen. First thing noted is that I had no idea that he is only 18, which makes me feel really old considering I am 2 years older than him. He is so innocent and cute looking. Plus that song has had the tendancy to make me get somewhat teary eyed due to it's topic of teen suicide. The video was a killer, it is definately on my top tear jerker song lists. I don't know if it is because I had come so close to killing myself in high school that it makes me tear up of wether it is because of knowing of people who have killed themselves and truly wondering what the title is. . .How do you get that lonely? But on the other hand I can completely see how people feel that way. There was a definately a time in my life where as the song says, "You finally make the call, that having no life at all, is better than the life that you had." I truly believe that we will never know how many teen suicides are due to homosexuality. Imagine. . . for those who are not gay. . . that you are the most popular guy at school, every girl likes you, you are into sports you are completely masculine your parents are proud of there tough, all star son, but you can't keep your eyes off the boys. You know that you can't be who you are. You feel that your parents will hate you. Would you not consider just ending it while nobody knows so that all you will be is a good memory of that awesome kid. I have heard stories for example in my English 101 class like that. This girl shared about her friend who hung himself when he was 16. She said, "He was a regular teenage hottie" shw said how popular he was and how he was the sweetest nicest and happy kid. Then he killed himself out of nowhere. Of course I didn't propose what imediately came to mind, I bet you almost anything that he was gay and his parents were the type that would have never accepted him for who he was. Well now that I have rambled for ever I think I will go back to the sad songs, and bum myself out more. I am so happy that everything got better for me though...I wish that I could have an opportunity to speak with any kid who wants to kill themselves, esspecially over being gay. I wish I could share with them how there is hope out there. Goodnight my friends.