Tomorrow cries
havent updated in forever.. a lot has happened..well start with thurday..
Thursday ~ went to a lunch-in @ the church to met russians.. woohoo, let me tell you.. boring* it lasted about 3 hours, I finally got home @ 3:30 showered, relaxed, called Jerry and made plans to go to truck night.. while getting ready I was on the phone w/ Katyln she had a beep, i waited patiently for her to come back when she did she had horrible news about jake and how he had passed away about 5 hours ago.. so many things ran throu my mind.. i was in such shock and denail.. I had known Jake sence like forever.. we were bat girl + bat boy for our older sisters when we were like 6 throu 10, we had hung out @ skool and hung out memorial weekend.. my mind was out the window when she told me that a million things just ran to my mind, what do you say to that? i paused for a bout a minute n Katyln ended the conversation I walked down stairs n Jerry was here, he told my mom n brother who had known jake too, they were also in shock.. about 10 min l8r, we had left for truck nite where I saw sum friends from skool it was ok but I just wasnt me to much on my mind to actually have fun.. came home @ 11, bawled my eyes out and talked to sum friends on aol, finally went to sleep..
Friday ~ barely got any sleep, woke up had to do yard work, wooohooo.. my mom made me sit down n talk about what was going throu my mind i was still speechless and just bawled, I think that said enough... that nite I went out w/ Becca to the fair to get my mind off of things, met up with a lot of people from other skools and hung out with them, had sum fun n wasnt so stressed it was nice*
Saturday ~ woke up dead tired from now sleeping for the past 2 days, got enough sleep to survive I guess.. went to the camp ground saw my parents and hung out w/ them for the day w/ Bobby.. i got my mind off of things there too it was nice, i dont think I've laughed that much with them but it was good.. went home around 7'ish got ready and went to Jake's candle light service, got there I was fine, I gave sum ppl hugs then the service started.. I started to break down luckily kelley was there and I love her very much for being there for me, katyln sang a songwhich might I add was very good the service lasted about an hour long, i bawled for about 45-50 min of that hour.. after the service me n kellet went around giving hugs it was nice to see friends from skool, but not kool to hav to see them there.. after 15 min of socializing we headed home.. came home around 9:30 called my mom hung out around the houes then Becky + Bobby + Katie came home, they all tryed to cheer me up.. I talked on the phone w/ kelley @ lik midnight n we watched thirteen lol after that odd movie i talked on the internet to a lot of friends I couldnt fall asleep til' 5 that morning
Sunday ~ 3 hrs of sleep, went to church, started to cry there as they kept metioning Jake not exactly easy, afterwards went to the camp for about 3 hrs, came home got ready for calling hours.. calling hours were depressed no doubt, once again got to see alot of friends but not the rite place..... um i cryed but not as bad as the nite b4, came home relaxed then went to Alexis's for the nite to hangout w/ Kayla * Katyln * Sammie * Alexis.. it was a lot of fun
Monday ~ no alot of sleep in the past 2 days kinda drained, went to the eastwood mall got 3 outfits 2 pairs of shoes 4 skool so far.. it was my bday gift whoop whoop.. thats about all the really happened i guess..
<3
"Best Of You"
I've got another confession to make
I'm your fool
Everyone's got their chains to break
Holdin' you
Were you born to resist or be abused?
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Are you gone and onto someone new?
I needed somewhere to hang my head
Without your noose
You gave me something that I didn't have
But had no use
I was too weak to give in
Too strong to lose
My heart is under arrest again
But I break loose
My head is giving me life or death
But I can't choose
I swear I'll never give in
I refuse
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Has someone taken your faith?
Its real, the pain you feel
You trust, you must
Confess
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Oh...