eye talian
My mom sent this to me in an email, and I thought it was funny. For those of you who are Italian or know anything about being Italian, this is for you.
> E y e - T a l i a n
>
>
>
>
> Why do Italians hate Jehovah's Witnesses?
> Because Italians hate all witnesses.
>
> Do you know why most men from Italy are named Tony?
> On the boat over to America they put a sticker on them that said - TO
>NY.
>
> You know you're Italian when . . . . You can bench press 325 pounds,
> shave twice a day and still cry when your mother yells at you.
>
> You carry your lunch in a produce bag because you can't fit
> two cappicola sandwiches, 4 oranges, 2 bananas and pizzelles
> into a regular lunch bag.
>
> Your mechanic, plumber, electrician, accountant,
> travel agent and lawyer are all your cousins.
>
> You have at least 5 cousins living in the same town or on the same
>block..
> All five of those cousins are named after your
> grandfather or grandmother.
>
> You are on a first name basis with at least 8 banquet hall owners.
>
> You only get one good shave from a disposable razor.
>
>
> If someone in your family grows beyond 5' 9",
> it is presumed his Mother had an affair.
>
> There were more than 28 people in your bridal party.
>
> You netted more than $50,000 on your first communion.
>
> . . . . . . .
>
> And you REALLY, REALLY know you're Italian when . . .
>
>
>
> Your grandfather had a fig tree.
>
> You eat Sunday dinner at 2:00.
>
> Christmas Eve . . . only fish.
>
> Your mom's meatballs are the best.
>
>
> You've been hit with a wooden spoon or had a shoe thrown at you.
>
> Clear plastic covers on all the furniture.
>
> You know how to pronounce "manicotti" and "mozzarella."
>
> You fight over whether it's called "sauce" or "gravy."
>
> You've called someone a "mamaluke."
>
> And you understand "bada bing".
> E y e - T a l i a n
>
>
>
>
> Why do Italians hate Jehovah's Witnesses?
> Because Italians hate all witnesses.
>
> Do you know why most men from Italy are named Tony?
> On the boat over to America they put a sticker on them that said - TO
>NY.
>
> You know you're Italian when . . . . You can bench press 325 pounds,
> shave twice a day and still cry when your mother yells at you.
>
> You carry your lunch in a produce bag because you can't fit
> two cappicola sandwiches, 4 oranges, 2 bananas and pizzelles
> into a regular lunch bag.
>
> Your mechanic, plumber, electrician, accountant,
> travel agent and lawyer are all your cousins.
>
> You have at least 5 cousins living in the same town or on the same
>block..
> All five of those cousins are named after your
> grandfather or grandmother.
>
> You are on a first name basis with at least 8 banquet hall owners.
>
> You only get one good shave from a disposable razor.
>
>
> If someone in your family grows beyond 5' 9",
> it is presumed his Mother had an affair.
>
> There were more than 28 people in your bridal party.
>
> You netted more than $50,000 on your first communion.
>
> . . . . . . .
>
> And you REALLY, REALLY know you're Italian when . . .
>
>
>
> Your grandfather had a fig tree.
>
> You eat Sunday dinner at 2:00.
>
> Christmas Eve . . . only fish.
>
> Your mom's meatballs are the best.
>
>
> You've been hit with a wooden spoon or had a shoe thrown at you.
>
> Clear plastic covers on all the furniture.
>
> You know how to pronounce "manicotti" and "mozzarella."
>
> You fight over whether it's called "sauce" or "gravy."
>
> You've called someone a "mamaluke."
>
> And you understand "bada bing".