Fuuuuuuuuuuuuck
I'm not sure I have words to describe just how pissed off with myself I am right now. I have managed to royally fuck myself in the arse this time. And pretty much screwed over my family as well.
And it's all fucking my fault.
Have just discovered that I am a huge fucking idiot. For some brain-fucked reason I managed to mistake last year with this year. So when, all those months ago, my mum was booking the big family trip to Florida, the one that is costing several thousand pounds, the one that involves all of us and my aunt and cousins renting a big villa and having that Disneyland/Universal/Sea World/All the fucking cool theme parks ever trip that everyone dreams of as a kid. When finally, finally I was going to get to go to America on what would likely have been my last ever holiday with my parents, that time, that one time, I managed to look up the wrong term dates. So instead of having the holiday I have wanted since I was old enough to understand what Disneyland was in the last two weeks of the Easter break, my family are going to be away for my last week of Easter, and the first week back afterwards.
It might be possible I guess to miss a week of lectures, but in my final year? Not good. And I have coursework due on that Monday. I guess I might be able to submit it early, we get the assignment a few weeks before, and the lecturer did say it would only take a couple of hours to complete. Oh yeah, and my dissertation is due the Thursday after. So, missing a whole week of lectures, 4 weeks before I start my final exams, when I have coursework due that week and my final project report due the week after, or missing the holiday I've been looking forward to since we started talking about it two years ago and that my parents have spent so much money on.
If I don't go I am going to hate it that they're there and I'm not. I'm going to feel so guilty for wasting all that money. I don't know when I'll ever get another chance to go. If I do go and that affects the outcome of my degree then I'm not sure I'm ever going to be able to forgive myself.
I don't want to have to make that decision.
Please can I just have a time machine and go back and get my mum to book it for the right dates?
And it's all fucking my fault.
Have just discovered that I am a huge fucking idiot. For some brain-fucked reason I managed to mistake last year with this year. So when, all those months ago, my mum was booking the big family trip to Florida, the one that is costing several thousand pounds, the one that involves all of us and my aunt and cousins renting a big villa and having that Disneyland/Universal/Sea World/All the fucking cool theme parks ever trip that everyone dreams of as a kid. When finally, finally I was going to get to go to America on what would likely have been my last ever holiday with my parents, that time, that one time, I managed to look up the wrong term dates. So instead of having the holiday I have wanted since I was old enough to understand what Disneyland was in the last two weeks of the Easter break, my family are going to be away for my last week of Easter, and the first week back afterwards.
It might be possible I guess to miss a week of lectures, but in my final year? Not good. And I have coursework due on that Monday. I guess I might be able to submit it early, we get the assignment a few weeks before, and the lecturer did say it would only take a couple of hours to complete. Oh yeah, and my dissertation is due the Thursday after. So, missing a whole week of lectures, 4 weeks before I start my final exams, when I have coursework due that week and my final project report due the week after, or missing the holiday I've been looking forward to since we started talking about it two years ago and that my parents have spent so much money on.
If I don't go I am going to hate it that they're there and I'm not. I'm going to feel so guilty for wasting all that money. I don't know when I'll ever get another chance to go. If I do go and that affects the outcome of my degree then I'm not sure I'm ever going to be able to forgive myself.
I don't want to have to make that decision.
Please can I just have a time machine and go back and get my mum to book it for the right dates?