Beyond Regrets

[niayesungie]

Title:  Beyond Regrets
Characters:  Yesung, Siwon, Hangeng, Heechul, OC
Pairings:  Yewon, Siwon/OC, brief!Hanchul
Genre: Angst, implied!smut
Rating: NC-17
Summary:  Regrets always awfully hurt.
Disclaimer:  I only own the story and the plot.  The characters in the fic don't resembling the real characters in their real life.

Comments

[jacklyntsang]

I don't know what is "Siwon is being bad/jackass nowadays/recently and need to be tortured" all about??? While I'm curious but skeptical b/c it's Siwon - the nicest gentleman you guys are talking about, right? And I don't see why that outside stuffs have anything to do with this story. But put that aside. Rest assure that my perception is purely based on the story and nothing else. When I read a piece of writing, I pay attention to the characters and how they are developed through out the plot, how it flows. Is it fresh/new? I don't care who's bad, who's good or who ends up with whom as long as it fits the story. Then see if there is/are surprised factor(s); any tight-knots/peaks/climaxes in the story and how those knots are un-tighten; any loopholes in there. Any lessons of life we can get out of it. The last things are the structure, grammar and spelling but those are not that important, the plot and characters are. Your story is beautiful because you got most of the things I look for are there.

If you insist with the idea of just lust only for Siwon's character when they were still in Cheonan, then there are big loopholes that you need to definitely change the storyline to fit that idea. The time lime of the actions and at least two of most important quotes of the story are no longer fit. You need to add some paragraphs to dig deeper in order guide/explain to readers how that idea is developed ... Nevertheless, after you do all these things, your story will lose most of it's beauties. It turns to a common one that I have read it somewhere. No more surprised factors or the heart-drenching feelings that make you keep asking what if ...

So, this beautiful piece writing of your was somehow created "out of your intention" ... I see ... haha ... but I'd like to keep it like it's. Good one like this is hard to find in fanfic world today.

PS. About the trust factor, of course. Even I didn't spell it out, I did say Siwon did the worst thing and that caused Yesung close his heart since then. But, they always thought it's just LUST/being used by other for LUST only and it's hurt. So, they never said to each other they committed in relationship ... still it's stupid thing to do.

[niayesungie]

it's funny that i failed in communicating my imagination through my fic, yet it become much more dramatic than the original intention... it's because i was crying while typing the most part of this and somehow my brain wrecked that way :p i indeed don't wanna change it, since i almost gave up with this fic in December (this one abandoned for like 2 weeks before i finish the last sub-chapter) and i like it this way (what writer am i liking my own writing -___-). let Siwon's actual feelings for Yesung in Cheonan become the reader's opinion... i feel like it's wrong to "defend" siwon's love for Yesung in the fic and "pushing" my own intention to the reader haha.
one of my friends even ask me "why Siwon didn't just left Yesung in peace?" and me, in my sane mind, also thought that way. but me in my writer's mind said, "That's why i made it a story." i realize this fic is maybe too much, too many irrational drama and unnecessary angsty angsty angst and too pervert-minded siwonnie involved. but your support brighten my day. you don't know how much your support for this fic means to me, since i was VERY not confortable with this story (a reason for abandonment). your critics also help me to be more rational and detailed next time, since not every reader understands the aim of the writer if the writer being so confusing right? :p
how can i really thank you? *hug you*

[jacklyntsang]

Reading your replies, I realize how far off this story to your original intention. And I swear, you are the cutest confused fic writer ... EVER ... so far ... haha ... All elements you used for this story are necessary, nothing is over the top or unacceptable.

Of course, Yesung wouldn't open his eyes to clear thing up at that moment so they can be happy ever after. It's the beauty of this angst, we have to keep asking what if and only wish, right? Otherwise, you have to change the title of your fic too ...lol

About the time of Yesung in unconscious. No, no, no ... It can't be as you said. First, it's opposite with your own writing there ??? Second, it'll not support the story. The oh so obvious loophole that will ruin the most important and beautiful part of the story. Yesung wouldn't be able hear and feel all the pain, the angst that Siwon have been through and realize they both have suffered, living in a pitiful and regretful parallel life.

Dear, I think you have not completely recognized how beautiful your piece of writing here. Maybe, you were so into making Siwon a jackass ...haha... I feel rather graceful for you being in that confusing state of mind while writing this beautiful fic. Otherwise, we wouldn't have this conversation. Hug ...hug ... You should get all the outside stuffs out of your mind and reread your story in order to fully appreciated your own work ...he...he...

PS. Talking about Siwon being a jackass thing, it seems serious. I have left message to ask a reader here tell me the reason but I don't know if she will come back here to read it. So, do you know anything about it?

And talking about why I come back here, I'd like to ask you and other readers here if there is a chance you guys come across fics that I'm looking for or waiting for for a while. It's a Yewon fic and should be a smut one ...he...he It should be based on their recent PDA all over. So lovey dovey in their activities, singing to each other, giving flowers, popping out of hotel with couple clothes and Siwon with hickey on his neck ...

Actually, I'm kind of surprised and disappointed to see just a few Yewon fics nowadays because I keep seeing or reading about them doing PDA in all events. I think Yewon writers are too busy to get on net, no?

[niayesungie]

yesung was unconscious until he came (i imagined he woken up because of his orgasm), because i think it's impossible if a person could pretend himself to sleep all the time while being seduced physically (and mostly in the genital part). all the reaction he gave: "Yesung's back was arched while the eyes still shut, and Siwon got really amazed by that. The silent moans and incoherent voices Yesung made was so beautiful, Siwon loved it to death." in my imagination is a rational reaction of an active (alive) body while being pleasured though the mind is inactive.
and when his conscious mind back, all he saw is Siwon in tears and started pleasuring himself. when Siwon finished pleasuring himself, he redressed Yesung up and then hold his body all night close to him, while crying. "He just remembered the way Siwon hugged him tight and caressed his hair softly while whispering all his love and regrets. Siwon kept blaming himself for his unrequited love towards him." this happened after Yesung was gained his consciousness and redressed by Siwon... Yesung didn't realize when Siwon left all the hickeys in his body: "He knew he was lying to himself when he saw all the lovebites Siwon left all over his body." all the hickeys surprised him, actually...
i think that explanation enough to convince you? because in this matter i was so sure once again lacked one important detail that Yesung awoken because of his pleasure... -_____-" i was really confused, and somehow i am really cute, eh? ahaha you're so kind to tell me so :")
hah, what smut are you just mentioning? i never see one like that before... oh, and now i'm really curious!! i think it's impossible for me to miss a new Yewon fic in LJ if it was posted in Yewon comm (and it's smut, so damn IMPOSSIBLE i missed smut here lol), perhaps you've seen it not in LJ? and please, give me the link if you already found it *puppy eyes* *perverted mode*
i myself realized the lack of Yewon fics nowadays. it made me sad too... for me, it's hard to write a fic, and i think the amount of Yewonderfuls here are not much (not as much as other pairing's fans). and older Yewonderfuls are already gone. old writers (you must know some) seemed like they're leaving this comm already and never write anymore. it's sad, really.... although there are many potential and dedicated Yewon writers these days, the emptiness of the abscence of our older family is still lingering..

[jacklyntsang]

Yesung physically might not be fully recovered yet but mentally somewhat awaken. Your original thought doesn't work here for reasons as I said already. Honey, you don't need to convince me anything. Remember what I said? My perception is purely based on reading your story and nothing eles. Moreover, I don't have any knowlegde about your intention from the start, just follow every details of the storyline only, no bias at all. Your story is just beautiful as it is, no loophole. That's why I said you need to forget about your initial idea/thought, erase them all and reread your story to fully appreciate and enjoy your own work. It's BEAUTIFUL, ok!

PS. You don't see Yewon fic I'm asking... So, it means no one has yet writen it. Too bad.