(no subject)
The past has been nagging at me lately.
Sara called me last night. I miss her and Logan probably the most out of anybody right now, and if I could I would fly them out here in a heartbeat so that we could talk about Berenbeim's garage, and other things that no one here would understand.
My intention when I got home from work was to use a gift that Katie Fricke got me forever ago as a practice journal. When I opened it, a couple of letters fell out.
1. A "pass-note" between Sara and I, talking about TJ, lawlz.
2. "Dear Mistress Amy,
I would try to sign your yearbook but I always feel too cheesy and impersonal so I'm writing you this letter of how much bootay-kicking your future holds. You made 6th period something to look forward to with your subtle, witty comments and Berenbeihm (?) burns. You are a beautiful woman who will be incredibly successful whether it's conquering the far-off lands of Narnia or just existentialism in literature 101. This summer we should have a little fiesta with some of the art history peeps and Rohan (glorious man) because I'm going to miss this class more than any. You are one of the few people I'll genuinely miss next year so we'll have to meet up during breaks. You're a beauitful person on a thousand different levels =)
-Scotty"
A letter written to me by Scotty Wetzel. It was his yearbook signing to me, but written on notebook paper. I haven't talked to him since we left for college, nor did I ever hang out with him outside of school. But he was one of those popular guys that was "real", and my awkward fishnet-stockinged self had respect for him. I'm touched by how genuine it was, regardless.
3. "Mix Masta Ames,
So tomorrow you leave for boston you lucky bitch. We're finally where we wanted to be since 6th grade. Jesus-that feels like a century ago.
All I can say is thank you.
For the good times and the bad times.
Thank you for the memories and for taking care of me when I was totally tripping out on straight hash. And thank you for pretending that NEVER happened.
Cheer to our spice girls moments. Our broken hearts. The Negative Nancy's. Those drunken nights. Our journeys to the forest and star gazing at Berenbeim's.
You have always been my best friend. I love you and I wish you all the luck at Berklee. May you find peace, happiness and care.
Put your pot to good use.
POGFM always,
DJ Mix Masta JesUs, Jes Claypool, Jessika Gayle Colis Pinera"
Jesus, this one still hurts. I haven't talked to her in years...besides my sporadic phone calls every few months as a desperate attempt to save one of the best friendships I ever had (Kana has actually surpassed this, but it's the same thing: we just. GOT. each other). We survived our fair share of fights (including one in which she pretended to be heartless and evil and told me she would kill me. I saw right through it), music, fashion statements, family issues, car rides home. Come senior year of high school, she chose her boyfriend over us. I'm still bitter, but despite my hostility, I know that if she talked to me I'd embrace her and it'd be as if no time has passed. Maybe it'll happen. Maybe.
4.
"Amy, you are probably somewhere in Europe right now, thats if you listened to me and did not open this while on the plane, I'm not sure what you are doing right now playing violin or something, I'm writing this in a car waiting for you to go to Ann's so I can see you. When you read this I'll probably be either working at F21 or masterbating. I hope you are having an amazing time and doing things that you can tell me about (I bet the guys there are so hottt) Remember me, your poor, melencholy whore. I'm probably missing you terribly, I already am. But I hope that you are having a carefree, fun time, don't worry about me. Buy me something. I miss your eyes. I want to kiss you.
Nevermind this idiocy, forget me and have fun, hook up with cute Europeans.
I cannot think of anything else to write in blue, red however...
remember my passion for you that drips onto this card.
-Matthew Cadier Kim"
I've thought about this card, but not for a while, and I had no idea where it was until now. While I galavanted through 4 different countries in Europe (Austria, Germany, Switzerland, Hungary) I held onto this card like a fucking treasure. It was a relic, a reminder, and the only love letter I've ever received. I couldn't wait to go home the entire time, just to see him. 3 weeks later, he broke up with me the day after I came home. I was a mess, and hadn't really salvaged our friendship, until recently (thank you facebook). Apparently he's learning fiddle now, and wants me to give him a lesson if I go home. Hmm.
Lately I've just been feeling very lonely. I want to cuddle with someone and know that they mean it.
Sara called me last night. I miss her and Logan probably the most out of anybody right now, and if I could I would fly them out here in a heartbeat so that we could talk about Berenbeim's garage, and other things that no one here would understand.
My intention when I got home from work was to use a gift that Katie Fricke got me forever ago as a practice journal. When I opened it, a couple of letters fell out.
1. A "pass-note" between Sara and I, talking about TJ, lawlz.
2. "Dear Mistress Amy,
I would try to sign your yearbook but I always feel too cheesy and impersonal so I'm writing you this letter of how much bootay-kicking your future holds. You made 6th period something to look forward to with your subtle, witty comments and Berenbeihm (?) burns. You are a beautiful woman who will be incredibly successful whether it's conquering the far-off lands of Narnia or just existentialism in literature 101. This summer we should have a little fiesta with some of the art history peeps and Rohan (glorious man) because I'm going to miss this class more than any. You are one of the few people I'll genuinely miss next year so we'll have to meet up during breaks. You're a beauitful person on a thousand different levels =)
-Scotty"
A letter written to me by Scotty Wetzel. It was his yearbook signing to me, but written on notebook paper. I haven't talked to him since we left for college, nor did I ever hang out with him outside of school. But he was one of those popular guys that was "real", and my awkward fishnet-stockinged self had respect for him. I'm touched by how genuine it was, regardless.
3. "Mix Masta Ames,
So tomorrow you leave for boston you lucky bitch. We're finally where we wanted to be since 6th grade. Jesus-that feels like a century ago.
All I can say is thank you.
For the good times and the bad times.
Thank you for the memories and for taking care of me when I was totally tripping out on straight hash. And thank you for pretending that NEVER happened.
Cheer to our spice girls moments. Our broken hearts. The Negative Nancy's. Those drunken nights. Our journeys to the forest and star gazing at Berenbeim's.
You have always been my best friend. I love you and I wish you all the luck at Berklee. May you find peace, happiness and care.
Put your pot to good use.
POGFM always,
DJ Mix Masta JesUs, Jes Claypool, Jessika Gayle Colis Pinera"
Jesus, this one still hurts. I haven't talked to her in years...besides my sporadic phone calls every few months as a desperate attempt to save one of the best friendships I ever had (Kana has actually surpassed this, but it's the same thing: we just. GOT. each other). We survived our fair share of fights (including one in which she pretended to be heartless and evil and told me she would kill me. I saw right through it), music, fashion statements, family issues, car rides home. Come senior year of high school, she chose her boyfriend over us. I'm still bitter, but despite my hostility, I know that if she talked to me I'd embrace her and it'd be as if no time has passed. Maybe it'll happen. Maybe.
4.
"Amy, you are probably somewhere in Europe right now, thats if you listened to me and did not open this while on the plane, I'm not sure what you are doing right now playing violin or something, I'm writing this in a car waiting for you to go to Ann's so I can see you. When you read this I'll probably be either working at F21 or masterbating. I hope you are having an amazing time and doing things that you can tell me about (I bet the guys there are so hottt) Remember me, your poor, melencholy whore. I'm probably missing you terribly, I already am. But I hope that you are having a carefree, fun time, don't worry about me. Buy me something. I miss your eyes. I want to kiss you.
Nevermind this idiocy, forget me and have fun, hook up with cute Europeans.
I cannot think of anything else to write in blue, red however...
remember my passion for you that drips onto this card.
-Matthew Cadier Kim"
I've thought about this card, but not for a while, and I had no idea where it was until now. While I galavanted through 4 different countries in Europe (Austria, Germany, Switzerland, Hungary) I held onto this card like a fucking treasure. It was a relic, a reminder, and the only love letter I've ever received. I couldn't wait to go home the entire time, just to see him. 3 weeks later, he broke up with me the day after I came home. I was a mess, and hadn't really salvaged our friendship, until recently (thank you facebook). Apparently he's learning fiddle now, and wants me to give him a lesson if I go home. Hmm.
Lately I've just been feeling very lonely. I want to cuddle with someone and know that they mean it.