S-CONSCIOUS: Ju te veux
Title: S-CONSCIOUS: Ju te veux
Chapter 8/?
Pairings: ManaxGackt, Manax?
Genre; romance/drama/angsty
Warnings: Angsty. I don't want to reveal anything before you read it, but someone ends up in the hospital.
Disclaimer; I don’t own Mana or Gackt, or anyone else OR the song Dears by Gackt. It’s mostly fiction. If I could buy them I would, but until then - no, I don’t own them.
Author’s note: This was a bit hard for me to write, I get too emotionally involved in stories *sigh*
And this chapter is a bit short, but next will be longer (I hope)!
Please leave a comment!
Kami and Gackt rushed to the bedroom, fearing the worst.
They entered the dark bedroom, finding Mana scared senseless, gripping the sheets. He seemed paralyzed by fear.
They were alone in the room and couldn’t find anything out of order except their friend being terrified. Kami slowly approached the bed in fear of frightening his dear friend even more and embraced him. “Shh, it was just a bad dream. No one will hurt you” he mumbled, rocking them both a little. Gackt sat down beside them and gently made Mana release his grip on the sheets and took both of the trembling hands in his own, stroking them softly with his thumb.
He quietly started to sing, the only thing he felt he could do;
*Just try to find the smallest light in the darkness.
The sun may not rise today, but
"The rain will stop eventually, won't it..."
You've grown tired of walking.
Yet your hands still hold on to a fading dream.
Even if I come to the end of my life,
There's something important that I shall never forget.
It's the fact I lived the same moment together with you.*
His voice trailed off, now just silently humming comfortingly.
Mana relaxed in Kami’s arms, letting his eyelids drop shut.
“I’m so tired” he mumbled almost inaudible.
“Then sleep some more. We won’t leave your side” Kami said, Gackt nodded in confirmation.
They silently tucked him in and laid down on both sides of him, once in a while stroked his hair or softly sang on a lullaby.
Mana slept through the day, completely drained of energy.
In the afternoon, Kami woke him up for some curry that Gackt had made them, knowing that his friend hadn’t eaten in almost 2 days.
After the dinner, he had decided to take a shower, finally being able to gather his thoughts a little.
Kami and Gackt waited patiently in the living room for him, trying to hold a normal conversation even though they were too worried about him to be able to think of much else.
After an hour had passed Gackt felt as if something was terribly wrong.
“I’ll go and check if he’s okay” he said and walked out of the room, towards the bathroom.
He gently knocked on the door. “Mana, are things okay?”
There were no reply, just the pouring water was heard.
“Mana, can you open the door, please?”
He started to panic as no answer was heard this time either.
He had the feeling that he had to get into the bathroom, now. After searching through a couple of rooms for anything useable, he finally found a screwdriver that would help him open the lock.
He rushed back to the bathroom door, where Kami now stood and pleaded for Mana to open the door.
Gackt quickly opened the lock though his hands were trembling, threw the door open and ran to the bathtub. While embracing the almost life-less man he repeated over and over again quietly
“Oh, my dear Mana, why did you do this to yourself? ..Please wake up, my dear”.
Kami called the emergency, telling them they needed an ambulance, fast. He was in too much shock to absorb the scene in front of him to feel anything.
After a couple of minutes the ambulance came, taking Mana to the hospital. Both Gackt and Kami were allowed to ride alongside in the ambulance, not wanting to leave Mana’s side.
When they arrived, they had to wait outside the room while the doctors worked hastily.
They paced in the corridor, it felt like time stood still. Kami called Yu~Ki and Közi and told them what had happened, they came down as soon as they could.
A while later, the doctor walked out of Mana’s room, telling them that he would be fine, but needed rest and as much support from them possible. He also said that they could meet him, but only one at a time and for a short while.
Gackt entered the quiet, white room, sitting down beside Mana and stroked the hand that didn’t have tubes attached to it.
“How are you feeling?” He asked with tears in his eyes.
Mana didn’t look at him, just said in a low voice “You shouldn’t have saved me.”
The tears rolled down his cheeks, staining the white sheets.
“I said I wouldn’t let anyone hurt you. That includes you”
A silence lingered. “I love you, Mana. I understand if you don’t feel the same, I understand even if you hate me. But don’t do anything like this again.” He squeezed Mana’s hand, letting him know he wouldn’t leave.
He started to sob uncontrollably, “I’m so sorry, it just hurt too much, I’m sorry I did this to you, Gackt.”
Gackt embraced him, holding him tightly until a nurse came in to the room and told them that visitor’s time were over. He unwillingly let go, whispered “I love you” softly before he walked out from the hospital room.
Outside, Kami was impatiently waiting. “How was he?”
“I don’t know. I hope he’ll be alright.” now Gackt started to cry onto his friends shoulder, “he said he wished I hadn’t saved him” .
Kami embraced him in a warm hug, “He’ll be alright, you’ll see. This time he has all of us to help him through.” He tried to keep his own voice steady.
Gackt stayed at the hospital as the others went home after he had assured them that he’d call if anything happened.
The next day, Mana was released from the hospital. He said he wanted to go home alone, but Gackt had insisted he’d be there with him.
“I won’t let you hurt yourself” he whispered into Mana’s ear.
Gackt escorted him home and made him lunch, not letting him out of his sight.
After a lunch in silence, Gackt had since long given up on starting a conversation, he finally spoke.
“What do you think about watching a movie? We’ll watch whatever you like.”
Mana just nodded and walked to the living room and started a movie before sitting down on the big couch. Gackt sat down next to him and wrapped his arm around him, pulling him close.
A soft sigh escaped Mana’s lips, he finally felt safe. He knew Gackt wouldn’t ever hurt him, that he would protect him.
“Don’t let me go.” The words came as a soft whisper.
“I won’t” he replied, kissing the top of his head.
Both were tired so it didn’t take long before they both fell asleep, finding comfort in the embrace.
When Mana woke up he was alone on the couch with a blanket around him, finally had got a good nights sleep.
”Gackt?” He called softly, hoping he wasn’t alone.
After just a couple of seconds, Gackt poked his head through the door way ”Yes?” in his normal, almost cheery voice ”Breakfast is ready”.
He received a small smile from Mana, who walked to him and held him closely, nuzzling into his chest.
“Good morning to you too” he said into Mana’s hair and kissed the top of his head, glad to finally see Mana feel a bit better.
“What’s for breakfast?”
“Your favourite” a little smirk crept its way over Gackt’s face ”fresh fruit”.
~To be Continued~
Chapter 8/?
Pairings: ManaxGackt, Manax?
Genre; romance/drama/angsty
Warnings: Angsty. I don't want to reveal anything before you read it, but someone ends up in the hospital.
Disclaimer; I don’t own Mana or Gackt, or anyone else OR the song Dears by Gackt. It’s mostly fiction. If I could buy them I would, but until then - no, I don’t own them.
Author’s note: This was a bit hard for me to write, I get too emotionally involved in stories *sigh*
And this chapter is a bit short, but next will be longer (I hope)!
Please leave a comment!
Kami and Gackt rushed to the bedroom, fearing the worst.
They entered the dark bedroom, finding Mana scared senseless, gripping the sheets. He seemed paralyzed by fear.
They were alone in the room and couldn’t find anything out of order except their friend being terrified. Kami slowly approached the bed in fear of frightening his dear friend even more and embraced him. “Shh, it was just a bad dream. No one will hurt you” he mumbled, rocking them both a little. Gackt sat down beside them and gently made Mana release his grip on the sheets and took both of the trembling hands in his own, stroking them softly with his thumb.
He quietly started to sing, the only thing he felt he could do;
*Just try to find the smallest light in the darkness.
The sun may not rise today, but
"The rain will stop eventually, won't it..."
You've grown tired of walking.
Yet your hands still hold on to a fading dream.
Even if I come to the end of my life,
There's something important that I shall never forget.
It's the fact I lived the same moment together with you.*
His voice trailed off, now just silently humming comfortingly.
Mana relaxed in Kami’s arms, letting his eyelids drop shut.
“I’m so tired” he mumbled almost inaudible.
“Then sleep some more. We won’t leave your side” Kami said, Gackt nodded in confirmation.
They silently tucked him in and laid down on both sides of him, once in a while stroked his hair or softly sang on a lullaby.
Mana slept through the day, completely drained of energy.
In the afternoon, Kami woke him up for some curry that Gackt had made them, knowing that his friend hadn’t eaten in almost 2 days.
After the dinner, he had decided to take a shower, finally being able to gather his thoughts a little.
Kami and Gackt waited patiently in the living room for him, trying to hold a normal conversation even though they were too worried about him to be able to think of much else.
After an hour had passed Gackt felt as if something was terribly wrong.
“I’ll go and check if he’s okay” he said and walked out of the room, towards the bathroom.
He gently knocked on the door. “Mana, are things okay?”
There were no reply, just the pouring water was heard.
“Mana, can you open the door, please?”
He started to panic as no answer was heard this time either.
He had the feeling that he had to get into the bathroom, now. After searching through a couple of rooms for anything useable, he finally found a screwdriver that would help him open the lock.
He rushed back to the bathroom door, where Kami now stood and pleaded for Mana to open the door.
Gackt quickly opened the lock though his hands were trembling, threw the door open and ran to the bathtub. While embracing the almost life-less man he repeated over and over again quietly
“Oh, my dear Mana, why did you do this to yourself? ..Please wake up, my dear”.
Kami called the emergency, telling them they needed an ambulance, fast. He was in too much shock to absorb the scene in front of him to feel anything.
After a couple of minutes the ambulance came, taking Mana to the hospital. Both Gackt and Kami were allowed to ride alongside in the ambulance, not wanting to leave Mana’s side.
When they arrived, they had to wait outside the room while the doctors worked hastily.
They paced in the corridor, it felt like time stood still. Kami called Yu~Ki and Közi and told them what had happened, they came down as soon as they could.
A while later, the doctor walked out of Mana’s room, telling them that he would be fine, but needed rest and as much support from them possible. He also said that they could meet him, but only one at a time and for a short while.
Gackt entered the quiet, white room, sitting down beside Mana and stroked the hand that didn’t have tubes attached to it.
“How are you feeling?” He asked with tears in his eyes.
Mana didn’t look at him, just said in a low voice “You shouldn’t have saved me.”
The tears rolled down his cheeks, staining the white sheets.
“I said I wouldn’t let anyone hurt you. That includes you”
A silence lingered. “I love you, Mana. I understand if you don’t feel the same, I understand even if you hate me. But don’t do anything like this again.” He squeezed Mana’s hand, letting him know he wouldn’t leave.
He started to sob uncontrollably, “I’m so sorry, it just hurt too much, I’m sorry I did this to you, Gackt.”
Gackt embraced him, holding him tightly until a nurse came in to the room and told them that visitor’s time were over. He unwillingly let go, whispered “I love you” softly before he walked out from the hospital room.
Outside, Kami was impatiently waiting. “How was he?”
“I don’t know. I hope he’ll be alright.” now Gackt started to cry onto his friends shoulder, “he said he wished I hadn’t saved him” .
Kami embraced him in a warm hug, “He’ll be alright, you’ll see. This time he has all of us to help him through.” He tried to keep his own voice steady.
Gackt stayed at the hospital as the others went home after he had assured them that he’d call if anything happened.
The next day, Mana was released from the hospital. He said he wanted to go home alone, but Gackt had insisted he’d be there with him.
“I won’t let you hurt yourself” he whispered into Mana’s ear.
Gackt escorted him home and made him lunch, not letting him out of his sight.
After a lunch in silence, Gackt had since long given up on starting a conversation, he finally spoke.
“What do you think about watching a movie? We’ll watch whatever you like.”
Mana just nodded and walked to the living room and started a movie before sitting down on the big couch. Gackt sat down next to him and wrapped his arm around him, pulling him close.
A soft sigh escaped Mana’s lips, he finally felt safe. He knew Gackt wouldn’t ever hurt him, that he would protect him.
“Don’t let me go.” The words came as a soft whisper.
“I won’t” he replied, kissing the top of his head.
Both were tired so it didn’t take long before they both fell asleep, finding comfort in the embrace.
When Mana woke up he was alone on the couch with a blanket around him, finally had got a good nights sleep.
”Gackt?” He called softly, hoping he wasn’t alone.
After just a couple of seconds, Gackt poked his head through the door way ”Yes?” in his normal, almost cheery voice ”Breakfast is ready”.
He received a small smile from Mana, who walked to him and held him closely, nuzzling into his chest.
“Good morning to you too” he said into Mana’s hair and kissed the top of his head, glad to finally see Mana feel a bit better.
“What’s for breakfast?”
“Your favourite” a little smirk crept its way over Gackt’s face ”fresh fruit”.
~To be Continued~