Aug 19, 2006 14:26
i feel like im wasting my life & money.
im never gona be happy.
i finally found anti-depressants that worked & now i cant take them cuz im breaking out in hives.
i just broke my phone cuz i cant take any of the shit from my dad. i treat him like crap. i feel like shit for it. he does so much for me. im gona lose him. i wanted him to at least see me graduate. i dont think it'll happen.
i just wasted my money i dance. it wont make me happy.
ive put so much money into guitar it wont make me happy.
i put so much time//money into biking it used to make me happy cuz i didnt have to think about reality.. not anymore it put me in the hospital, thats all.
transferring to an arts school?! what was i thinking. nothing will ever make me happy & it fucking sucks.
im SO sick of hearing people say SMILE! thats all i hear SMILE!! shut the fuck up. its just not me. im not me. nothing makes me happy anymore. im nothing but miserable. i feel like nothing. i cant do this anymore. its such a waste of a life. it should just end already.
15 years and i havent goten anywhere or done anything. of killed my mother. thats all. whats the point in this life?!.. nothing!!