(no subject)
walking down a side street.
past little houses with miniature front yards and miniature trees casting shadows from the orange street lights that appear every so often.
my best friend to my right.
"it feels like pasadena"
its slightly chilly.
but we're all dressed up in layers for no reason.
to feel good for the 20 minutes we're actually gone.
the feeling of having everything [i've wanted].
the feeling of being lucky for a moment in life.
how long will this moment last?
a few years?
a few more?
now i sit here. alone. playing media from the band i've loved for so long. i threw my freshman year away in highschool to laying in my room blasting their album. amazing i thought. how do they do that? a dream. a destination. determination. into passion and production. pushing, pulling, scraping, fighting. for a dream. for nothing. and everything. all at once. :[see thought B]
i am proud of myself. i've worked for everything i have. everything.
its tight but i get by.
on everything. i still have the dream. but now its a lifestyle.
its the reason i wake up.
and i know i've said that before.
newsflash: i've said that before.
lets take a road trip. to anywhere. just to feel new.
"i get excited when i get confused"
B:]like the hustle and bustle of a hospital.
the many faces we see everyday. sitting in an elevator saying nothing.
i sat and stared at a woman pacing. mid 40s. grey payless type shoes. whispering something to herself. ruffled papers in her arm. she noticed me. i noticed her. what kind of life does she have? does she go home every night to her husband and kids and think about her job all night? or maybe she goes home to an empty apartment across town. she watches TV mindlessly and falls asleep and does the same thing all over again. or maybe she goes out and gets hammered. alone. or maybe with her friend. or her boyfriend. or her girlfriend. or something.
i wished i could of asked her. we stood so close to each other. "what is your life like outside of work?" your "other" life [as i heard it put by another lemming nurse on a different occasion]
we'll scatter about starting around 5 AM and scatter back around the same time 12 hours later.
hide away for a small pay. all night. everyone does it.[:
past little houses with miniature front yards and miniature trees casting shadows from the orange street lights that appear every so often.
my best friend to my right.
"it feels like pasadena"
its slightly chilly.
but we're all dressed up in layers for no reason.
to feel good for the 20 minutes we're actually gone.
the feeling of having everything [i've wanted].
the feeling of being lucky for a moment in life.
how long will this moment last?
a few years?
a few more?
now i sit here. alone. playing media from the band i've loved for so long. i threw my freshman year away in highschool to laying in my room blasting their album. amazing i thought. how do they do that? a dream. a destination. determination. into passion and production. pushing, pulling, scraping, fighting. for a dream. for nothing. and everything. all at once. :[see thought B]
i am proud of myself. i've worked for everything i have. everything.
its tight but i get by.
on everything. i still have the dream. but now its a lifestyle.
its the reason i wake up.
and i know i've said that before.
newsflash: i've said that before.
lets take a road trip. to anywhere. just to feel new.
"i get excited when i get confused"
B:]like the hustle and bustle of a hospital.
the many faces we see everyday. sitting in an elevator saying nothing.
i sat and stared at a woman pacing. mid 40s. grey payless type shoes. whispering something to herself. ruffled papers in her arm. she noticed me. i noticed her. what kind of life does she have? does she go home every night to her husband and kids and think about her job all night? or maybe she goes home to an empty apartment across town. she watches TV mindlessly and falls asleep and does the same thing all over again. or maybe she goes out and gets hammered. alone. or maybe with her friend. or her boyfriend. or her girlfriend. or something.
i wished i could of asked her. we stood so close to each other. "what is your life like outside of work?" your "other" life [as i heard it put by another lemming nurse on a different occasion]
we'll scatter about starting around 5 AM and scatter back around the same time 12 hours later.
hide away for a small pay. all night. everyone does it.[: