oh you've got grey eyes
Cassie asked me if I was still butthurt about you. It was funny, cause every time she and I fucked, every time we laid around naked, I was thinking about you. Sometimes it felt like cheating. Nearly every time it felt like lies and distraction. Her on my chest, me pretending to care. Something is usually better than nothing.
Anyway, I lied to her of course.
Been trying to lie to myself for a long time.
I think I'm getting better. A few more months, things should be good. Charlie misses you; misses pixie. I used to fantasize about going back to how things were, but mostly fantasize about much darker things. I may play D&D every Friday, but when I think about it, I really don't like fantasy, especially the ones that feel real. But that's because I live in my head. It's kind of a sickness, mixing up feelings with real life.
One day we'll talk again, and we'll be friends, cause I still love you. I don't want to lose that, even if maybe I did.
I think I'm still lying.
Anyway, I lied to her of course.
Been trying to lie to myself for a long time.
I think I'm getting better. A few more months, things should be good. Charlie misses you; misses pixie. I used to fantasize about going back to how things were, but mostly fantasize about much darker things. I may play D&D every Friday, but when I think about it, I really don't like fantasy, especially the ones that feel real. But that's because I live in my head. It's kind of a sickness, mixing up feelings with real life.
One day we'll talk again, and we'll be friends, cause I still love you. I don't want to lose that, even if maybe I did.
I think I'm still lying.