(no subject)
So a long time ago, I knew this kid who would say and do things to make people see a point of view, to change their mind. Ignoring what may have made that other person happy; some self-righteous --honestly pathetic-- attempt to help people and maybe at the time all the other person needed was someone to yell at, talk to, or just lean on.
Several stupid mistakes, choices, and a few relationships later the kid gave up on people; just tried his best to not see everything, to not pay attention, to just push through and make it back on his feet. A few clubbing adventures later, one-night stands, drunken moments and departure from familiarity; the kid began to wake up. The high-strung bullshit began to fade and some clarity slowly set in. Thinking back on all the mistakes the kid, me, myself, couldn’t shrug off; it comes down to saying sorry, not for forgiveness or to restart some old friendship, but for the piece of mind it was said, nothing more.
To Little-Miss: I really don’t remember what I said or how I said it, most of those times are just memories nothing more, so it is hard for me to bring up evidence that can support me on what I am apologizing for. There are a lot of undocumented events and conversations that lead to this, how things are now, and how it was dealt with then. I can’t specifically say sorry, I have never been the person to bullshit myself through doing it either, but this is honestly the best I can and may ever come up with.
To Lauren: Regardless if you realize it or not, you were one of the last stepping-stones to get to this, and I thank you. Not that I can take back what I said when I was mad, but if at ever possible, ill try. You caught me at my worst and still tried, I was honestly childish at best and then drove you to never speak to me again. I called you some time after, to just figure everything out, but never got a response, and ill assume it will stay that way. I hope you are well, I hope your going through with your dreams, and you sleep well. Be happy, because life is too short not to be, in my opinion and if you are already happy, stay that way, smile, it was always beautiful when you did.
To JT: Man if you were any nicer, you would possibly explode, you are always there when you are needed and a great friend. Sorry for going MIA so much, and never keeping in touch, I have always been “that” friend. My longest standing friendship to date and I completely blame you for this indy pop, mellow, happy go fucking lucky, phase in my life. Something Corporate - Walking by, all your damn fault. -.- IM me more mofo
Andrew: You are the collective parts of me ill never understand, just there -- never leaving but never staying. Just floating back and forth, you have always been there to call me on my shit, even if I never listen or noticed it in the background. In all honestly - fuck you and thanks.
That is it for the people who know / read this.
Several stupid mistakes, choices, and a few relationships later the kid gave up on people; just tried his best to not see everything, to not pay attention, to just push through and make it back on his feet. A few clubbing adventures later, one-night stands, drunken moments and departure from familiarity; the kid began to wake up. The high-strung bullshit began to fade and some clarity slowly set in. Thinking back on all the mistakes the kid, me, myself, couldn’t shrug off; it comes down to saying sorry, not for forgiveness or to restart some old friendship, but for the piece of mind it was said, nothing more.
To Little-Miss: I really don’t remember what I said or how I said it, most of those times are just memories nothing more, so it is hard for me to bring up evidence that can support me on what I am apologizing for. There are a lot of undocumented events and conversations that lead to this, how things are now, and how it was dealt with then. I can’t specifically say sorry, I have never been the person to bullshit myself through doing it either, but this is honestly the best I can and may ever come up with.
To Lauren: Regardless if you realize it or not, you were one of the last stepping-stones to get to this, and I thank you. Not that I can take back what I said when I was mad, but if at ever possible, ill try. You caught me at my worst and still tried, I was honestly childish at best and then drove you to never speak to me again. I called you some time after, to just figure everything out, but never got a response, and ill assume it will stay that way. I hope you are well, I hope your going through with your dreams, and you sleep well. Be happy, because life is too short not to be, in my opinion and if you are already happy, stay that way, smile, it was always beautiful when you did.
To JT: Man if you were any nicer, you would possibly explode, you are always there when you are needed and a great friend. Sorry for going MIA so much, and never keeping in touch, I have always been “that” friend. My longest standing friendship to date and I completely blame you for this indy pop, mellow, happy go fucking lucky, phase in my life. Something Corporate - Walking by, all your damn fault. -.- IM me more mofo
Andrew: You are the collective parts of me ill never understand, just there -- never leaving but never staying. Just floating back and forth, you have always been there to call me on my shit, even if I never listen or noticed it in the background. In all honestly - fuck you and thanks.
That is it for the people who know / read this.