Loose ends part 1
Title : Loose Ends
Pairing : Ryo/NEWS (Gen)
Rating : PG-13
Summary : In life and death, sometimes all you need is a helping hand. It takes 7 different people to teach Ryo this particular lesson.
A/N or Warnings : Warnings for character death (of a sort...) and a bit of blood. There are ghosts here. Beware.
Special love and thanks to my beta, who is a large part of the reason that this fic happened. You are an amazing person and an even more amazing friend and I don't know what I'd do without you or your hand holding and encouragement! ♥♥
Nishikido Ryo's life ends when he's 23 years old.
He's stabbed in the back by someone trying to rob him, in and out and then he's laid out against the pavement, not even enough breath left to curse as the asshole riffles through his pockets and take what little is there before running off. Ryo knows, rationally, that the guy's probably desperate and starving like a lot of other people--including Ryo himself-- are these days. Maybe he needs to feed his family or has a sick wife or kid that needs to see a doctor. Desperate times and all.
The non-rational part of Ryo can't help but hope that if the asshole does buy food that he chokes on it. Ryo's life hasn't been the most honest of lives up to this point, either; he lies, he cheats, he steals if he has to-- but he's never hurt anyone, never left them bleeding their life out in a dirty alleyway. He may be a crook, but he still thinks it's a pretty rotten thing to do to a person.
A few more labored breaths later and he's dead, without the time to really be scared or contemplate his life, or do much more than marvel at how quickly the blood is soaking through his shirt and running out onto the pavement around him.
An unglamorous death to go along with an unglamorous life.
Still, it was his unglamorous life, and he can't help but feel like something was stolen from him. It pisses him off.
He stays with his body as it cools in the night time air, the blood turning odd, dark colors as it thickens against the pavement, and wonders if this is the part where he vows revenge and becomes one of those angry ghosts that his older brothers used to tell him stories about on late summer nights.
He'd been so scared of ghosts back then (and maybe up until recently, but he isn't going to admit it to anyone), and now he is one. It might be funny if he wasn't the one living it. Or not living it, as it were.
"You're not a ghost."
The voice is soft, tone even and devoid of any indication that the speaker notices the dead body lying on the bloody pavement. It's a mere statement of fact, an observation. It makes the whole situation seem that much more surreal. Ryo wonders for a moment if, maybe, he's had too much to drink and this is actually all a dream that he'll wake up and barely remember tomorrow.
He shakes the thought out of his head and turns to seek out the source of the voice with a frown.
"Who are you?" The words are out of Ryo's mouth before he's even finished turning, his mouth turning downwards into a frown as he catches site of the unfamiliar figure leaning casually against the alley wall.
He's slightly shorter than Ryo, a fact which Ryo can't help but feel slightly smug over. He's got one of those faces that makes it hard to judge his age, but Ryo feels pretty safe putting him around the same age that he is. His dark eyes speak of experience and look out of place with the impishness of his features.
It all seems incredibly bland given the situation, like he's simply out for an evening stroll and happening upon a dead body and a lingering ghost is just part of the routine.
"You're not a ghost," the stranger repeats, lips quirking up on one side, just enough to give the impression of a smirk without really being one.
Ryo blinks, not quite sure what to make of the conversation-- if it could qualify as that. "I'm pretty sure that that's my body and blood all over the pavement. Unless this is some kind of bad dream, I'm dead."
"Oh, you're dead," the stranger agrees, his eyes flickering to the body and then away again just as quickly. "Very dead, I'd say. But being dead doesn't mean you're a ghost."
"Then what the hell am I?" Ryo shoots back, annoyed with the nonchalant way the other is talking about this, like it happens everyday.
Well, okay. People do die everyday, but those people aren't him, and this guy has to come along and start arguing with him about whether or not he's dead before his body's even done bleeding. It's irritating, to say the least.
"I never argued with you about whether you were dead," the stranger points out, his smirk widening.
"Stop that," Ryo mutters, scowling at him. "It's really hard to have a conversation with you when you keep changing the subject and... reading my mind, or whatever it is you're doing."
"Sorry."
Ryo doesn't think he sounds sorry in the least (and he really does hope the other can read his mind and caught that one, dammit). "If I'm not a ghost then what in the hell am I?"
"You know how in ghost stories there's always the 'other'? Something that's not quite human, but not a ghost, either?"
Ryo frowns but nods, not liking the particular direction of this conversation.
"That's me... and now you."
"So I'm, what... some sort of boogeyman?"
"I think 'shinigami' is what the kids are calling us these days." The other shrugs slightly at Ryo's look of disbelief. "It's as good a name as any, I guess. To tell you the truth, I don't think there is a word for what we are."
Well, this is just great. Not only is he dead, but he's a... nothing. "So you're one... whatever this is, too?"
"Yep."
"Are you here to take me to the other side, then?" Ryo glances back at his body and sighs. He doesn't really feel much of an attachment to it, but he is oddly reluctant to just leave it there like that, unsure if anyone will find it and, once they do, if there will even be anyone to care that he's dead.
"Nothing that dramatic," the stranger assures him, and Ryo can practically hear the laughter in his voice. "Unless you consider Tokyo the other side."
"Tokyo?" Ryo doesn't even try to keep the disdain out of his voice.
"Spoken like a true Kansai boy."
It takes two weeks for Ryo to actually find out the stranger's name, and even then it's only a fluke. The bastard seems to like annoying Ryo in any way he can, and withholding his name is just another way to do just that. Ryo has taken to calling him 'The Mole' because of the rather noticeable one on his chin. Sadly, the nickname doesn't annoy him nearly as much as Ryo wants it to.
"Hey, Nino!"
Ryo is too busy staring into his bowl of ramen and blatantly ignoring his lunch partner to really register that the words are directed at the man sitting across the table. He shifts the noodles around with his chopsticks, sighing inwardly. It seems unfair that he gets to eat regularly for the first time in his life (or not-life, as is the case), and he doesn't even need too. He doesn't really see the point of eating just for the sake of eating.
"Hey, Yoko." The Mole stops mid-bite and grins as the new arrival claps him on the shoulder and plops down onto an empty chair. "On business?"
"Yeah, Junno called in a favor I owed him."
Ryo blinks, staring at the new addition to their table for a long moment before it clicks and he gives The Mole a sour look. "Your name is Nino?"
Yoko is all smiles as he looks at Ryo and then back at Nino again, wagging his finger at him and clucking his tongue. "You didn't even tell him your name?"
Nino-- Ryo's almost disappointed that his name isn't something more sinister or interesting, but he guesses 'Ryo' really isn't the world's most intimidating name for an unnamed supernatural being, either-- just smiles back and shrugs. "Didn't seem important."
"So mean," Yoko sighs, the sympathy in his voice not quite matching the grin that he's still wearing. "So, you must be Ryo-chan." He extends his hand and Ryo ignores it in favor of bowing his head.
"Just Ryo. And you're... Yoko?"
"Ah! So you've heard about me?"
"No," Ryo answers honestly, feeling only slightly bad at the way the other man's grin falters a little at the admission. He's just being honest, afterall.
It doesn't take long for Yoko's smile to bounce back, though. "Ah, well, I'm Yoko. We'll be working together at some point, I'm sure."
"Just Yoko?"
"Yokoyama Kimitaka," he amends, the name sounding rusty, unused. "We don't really use our full names."
"'We'?" Ryo can't help but ask, trying not to look too eager and give Nino the satisfaction.
"Yeah... people like us," Yoko explains, laughing as he turns to Nino. "Geez, Nino, haven't you taught this kid anything?"
Nino just smiles. Ryo is tempted to stab him with his chopstick, but then decides it probably wouldn't do much good since he's already dead.
"I guess I get to teach you the trade," Nino says out of the blue later that night.
Ryo is tempted to pretend that he's asleep, but his curiosity wins out and he finds himself rolling over to stare at Nino through the dark. "The trade?"
"If you hadn't noticed, we don't sleep, so that trick is never going to work." Nino grins and Ryo glares at him, wishing there were some way to keep the other out of his head.
"Would you just answer the damn question?"
"Dead people," Nino answers. "Our business is dead people. Ghosts, to be exact."
"Ghosts? What do we do with ghosts?" Ryo asks with a frown.
Nino shrugs and smiles. "Whatever they need us to do with them."
Ryo sighs and wonders how, out of all the dead people there have to be in Japan, he ended up with this one for a teacher.
"What's this?" Ryo looks down at the worn piece of paper that Nino has laid out on the table between them, the writing hard to make out in the dim light of their only lantern. He squints and leans closer, mouthing the syllables as he reads it off: Yonehana, Nagasawa, Ikuta. It goes on for a few more lines, a list of names that mean nothing to him at all. "Are these the people I have to find?"
Nino shakes his head and laughs. "No, you don't get a list. It's not that easy."
"Then what is this?"
"A reminder," Nino answers, his face devoid of its usual smirk as he refolds the paper and tucks it between the pages of a book of ghost stories. Ryo would point out just how cliche it is that that happens to be the only book that they own between the two of them, but Nino would probably just find it amusing and tell him to stop being so serious. "You're going to learn a lot of new names doing this and you'll forget most of them."
"So I have to write them down?"
"No, that would take a lot more paper than this." Nino laughs and taps the cover of the book lightly with his finger. His face goes oddly serious as he continues. "These are just the ones that I can't forget. You'll have a list like this, too, eventually."
Ryo doesn't really understand completely but he nods anyway and they fall back into silence.
He forgets about the strange conversation and Nino's wrinkled piece of paper until he realizes, one day, that he's started keeping a list of his own. It's not written on a piece of paper and pressed between the pages of a book like Nino's, but it's still just as real. He keeps it locked away inside his head, hidden between his memories; seven names and faces that he can't forget.
It isn't until he mentions it to Nino one night years later as they sit on a rooftop sipping warm beer that he realizes he really doesn't want to.
1. Uchi Hiroki
The first time Ryo returns to his home town after his death, he meets Uchi Hiroki.
It's Yoko's fault, of course. He'd been down visiting Yoko in Osaka when the other had given him some sob story about not having time to take care of a job he had in Kadoma, and Ryo, being the schmuck that he is, had taken the bait and agreed to help him out. In retrospect, he probably should have known that he was being set up. Yoko had been hinting the last few times that Ryo had seen him that he should make a point to visit his hometown again, just for closure, hints that Ryo had steadfastly ignored, and Yoko is just the type to know that Ryo would be more likely to go if he had a job there.
He's willing to bet the bastard isn't even busy. He's probably sitting at home laughing at Ryo's stupidity.
Sometimes Yoko is almost worse than Nino.
He finds Uchi in a shop in the older part of town. He knows he's in the right place when he reads the character scrawled on the worn wooden sign above the door and catches a gimpse of brightly patterned silk through the partially opened door. He hesitates for just a moment before he slides the door the rest of the way open and steps inside, muttering a quick "please excuse me" under his breath.
"Ah... I'm sorry, but we're closed today, sir. We should be open again next week if you'd like to come back."
"Oh, I didn't realize," Ryo says, looking up to find the ghost of a young man who can't be a day over 20 staring back at him. He tries his friendliest smile. "Will you be open again soon?"
"We should be," the ghost answers, stepping out from between the displays, his smile just as stiff as his movements. "There's an illness in the family."
"Ah... sorry to hear that," Ryo says, bowing his head slightly. "I'll come back in a few days, then."
"Please do."
They trade polite goodbyes and bow their heads at each other before Ryo turns and steps out the way he came, deciding to give it two days tops before he returns. If he plays his cards right this could still be a quick one.
"I'm sorry, but we're-- oh, it's you again."
"Still closed?" Ryo asks as he slides the door shut behind him, already knowing what answer he's going to get. 'Dead' is not exactly an easy illness to cure, afterall.
"Yes." The ghost's eyes are sad as he steps forward into the room and bows his head in apology. "I'm sorry. There's another shop on the northern end of town. I can give you directions."
"Ah, yes. I've heard of them, but a friend recommended your shop specifically. He said you were the best." Ryo smiles and wonders when, exactly, it got so easy to lie. His brothers would be impressed, considering just how bad he was at it growing up.
"Really? Well... I guess I could make an exception, then. Just don't tell anyone." The ghost smiles a little, then, and Ryo thinks that if ghosts could blush this one would be.
"My lips are sealed, Uchi-san."
"Hiroki. You can call me Hiroki. 'Uchi-san' makes me feel old."
"Hiroki," Ryo repeats with a smile. "I'm Ryo. Nishikido Ryo."
Ryo goes home a few hours later with an expensive new yukata and an invitation to tea the next day.
It doesn't take Ryo long to get to know Hiroki, but that's not really much of a surprise to him. Ghosts are by nature lonely creatures, and they're so eager to have someone actually talk to them that it's generally not that hard to get to know them. Earning their trust is a bit harder, but it's something that Ryo's gotten good at over the years.
He is pretty surprised, however, when he realizes that he actually likes Hiroki.
It's not that he's disliked everyone that he's helped before this; it's just that he's never really felt a connection to any of them. Hiroki, on the other hand, feels like an old friend. Ryo finds himself laughing more around Hiroki than he has in all the years that he's been dead. Hiroki's also one of the first ghosts that he actually wants to get to know for the sake of knowing him and not because he has to.
He finds himself spending more and more time with the other and ignores that nagging voice in the back of his head that likes to remind him that he came here to do a job. He knows that he has to tell Hiroki the truth, but he keeps telling himself that it can wait a little longer, that Hiroki's not ready yet.
It's a Friday night and they're sitting on the floor in Uchi's room, a bottle of sake sitting on the table and two cups on the floor between them. Hiroki is telling (another) story about his mother and Ryo is listening quietly, more entertained by the other's enthusiasm than by the story itself.
"Wait... your mom used to dress you like a girl? That explains a lot."
"No." Hiroki frowns and stiffens a little, his face getting that over protective look that it always does when someone says something that might be a slight against his mother. "I was the one who wanted to wear it."
"That doesn't make it much better."
Uchi gives Ryo a dirty look but seems to realize that he hasn't really done himself any favors by clearing his mother's name. "Yeah, well, kids are weird. I bet you were a weird kid, too."
Ryo shakes his head. "I've always been this awesome."
"Liar." Uchi snorts and goes quiet for a moment before he speaks again, his voice thoughtful. "So, what about your family? You never talk about them."
"What about them?"
"I don't know-- do you have any siblings? What does your dad do? What's your mom like? You never talk about them." Hiroki's face in genuinely curious as he stretches his legs out across the tatami, his foot brushing against Ryo's thigh as he waits.
Ryo shrugs and reaches for his glass, taking a sip as he tries to stall. "They're dead."
"All of them? Shit... I'm sorry. I wouldn't have asked--"
"You didn't know," Ryo points out with a shrug and a weak smile. He wants to point out that it doesn't really matter because he's dead, too, but that would require an explanation that he really doesn't want to give at the moment.
"Still... I'm sorry." Hiroki bites his lip and presses his foot against Ryo's thigh. "I don't know what I'd do if that happened. Things have been bad enough since mom got sick."
"It's okay," Ryo says, more out of reflex than anything.
There's a moment of awkward silence where neither of them seem quite sure what to say. Hiroki breaks it just as the air around them is starting to get a bit too heavy. "Hey... are you still going to be in town next week?"
"Yeah. Why?"
"I thought we could go to the festival together."
"Only if you promise not to wear that girly yukata I've seen lying around here."
"My mom made that, you know."
"That explains a lot." Ryo winces as Uchi jabs him in the side with his big toe, but doesn't make an effort to supress his laughter.
As he's walking home that night, he tells himself that waiting another day or two to tell Uchi the truth won't hurt anything.
In the end it doesn't matter what Ryo tells himself, because Ryo doesn't have to tell Uchi he's dead; he finds out from his mother instead.
It's the day of the town festival and the excitement in the air is infectious. The streets are lined with lanterns and full of people hurrying back and forth, scrambling to finish all their last minute preparations. By the time he gets to the Uchi family shop and slips inside Ryo is grinning and feeling an eagerness he doesn't remember feeling since he was a kid.
That feeling abruptly dies when he gets to Hiroki's room and finds him sitting on the floor, staring blankly at the wall. He doesn't even blink when Ryo greets him, doesn't stir when Ryo stops in front of him and asks what's wrong. It's a full minute before he says anything, and in that minute Ryo can feel the ball of worry forming in the pit of his stomach.
"My aunt came to visit," Hiroki says finally, his voice soft and his eyes still staring blankly at the wall. "She was talking with my mother in the kitchen, said my mom needed to move on, that mourning wasn't going to bring me back."
Ryo feels his heart sink and wonder which makes him feel worse-- the fact that Hiroki had to find out like this, or the fact that he'd found out at all.
"I'm dead, aren't I?" Hiroki looks up at him then, his mouth curving downwards at the corners, eyes searching Ryo's face.
Ryo nods and looks down at his feet, not trusting his voice at the moment. He tries to remind himself that it's just a job, something he's done hundreds of times before and that Hiroki could be screaming or crying or could have just disappeared, the way that some do. It could be so much worse, really. He knows rationally that all these things are true, but it doesn't make the lump in his throat any less real.
"How long?"
"A few months."
"When mom got sick. Or not sick, I guess. Just sad. That explains all the crying."
"Yeah."
He watches as Hiroki bows his head and draws his legs up against his chest, his brow furrowed and eyes distant. He doesn't ask Ryo again, doesn't really say much of anything.
Ryo ignores the urge to put an arm around him and goes to the window, staring down at the street as the silence drags on around them. If there's one thing that being dead has taught him, it's patience.
The shadows in the street are already lengthening when Uchi finally stands again and closes the distance between them to take Ryo's hand. Ryo turns, frowning a little as he tightens his hand around the other's automatically.
"Hiroki?"
"Shut up." Hiroki tugs at Ryo's hand and pulls him towards the door. The look on his face is determined enough that Ryo does just that, letting himself be dragged out of the building and out onto the street.
Around them, lanterns are being lit and families are emerging from their homes, full of smiles and laughter and dressed in their festival best. He sees a mother crouching down, adjusting the obi on her daughter's yukata as the little girl squirms, obviously eager for them to be on their way.
They bypass the stalls and head away from the sights and smells and sounds of the festival, out to a dark, empty spot along the riverbank. Hiroki sits down in the grass and tugs at Ryo's hand until he has no choice but to take a seat beside him.
The riverbank is silent save for the steady hum of cicadas and the distant drone of the festival and the soft sound of Uchi's breathing. Ryo turns to look at him, watches him stare out at the river and the quickly darkening sky.
The first stars have already started to show when Uchi finally speaks. "I just want to see them one more time."
"See what?" Ryo asks, but the loud crack and the sudden explosion of color and light against the sky is all the answer he needs. He doesn't say anything after that, just tilts his head towards the sky, trying to remember the last time he'd actually taken the time to watch fireworks like this. After the first few, Hiroki lays his head against Ryo's shoulder and starts to hum a festival song, something that Ryo knows all the words to but can't remember the name. He remembers singing it with his family as a child.
They stay like that, huddled together in companionable silence until the show ends. Ryo thinks about his family, thinks about his life as it is now and about Hiroki and finally understands what Nino meant when he said that it was probably for the best that they didn't have any real power to change things, because right now, if he had that power, he'd want to use it.
Hiroki stops humming with the last of the fireworks and picks his head up off of Ryo's shoulder with a sigh. "Will you do me a favor?"
Anything, Ryo almost says, but just bites his tongue and nods slowly. "If it's something that I can do, yes."
"You'd say 'no' to a dead man?" Hiroki asks with a faint laugh. "You're the worst."
Ryo chuckles and shakes his head. "I'm not god here, you know."
"No, god would be better at this," Hiroki teases, turning to meet Ryo's eyes as he continues. "Don't worry, I won't ask you to bring me back to life. I just want you to watch them for me next year. The fireworks, I mean. I want to know someone else is watching them even if I can't."
"I will."
Ryo keeps his eyes fixed on the scattered lanterns across the river, as he hears more than sees Hiroki stand and brush non-existant dirt from his clothing. Nothing sticks to you when you're dead, but old habits die hard.
"Thanks," Hiroki murmurs just before Ryo hears him start to walk away.
"You, too," Ryo answers. By the time he turns his head to look behind him, the other's already gone.
2. Yamashita Tomohisa
Yamashita Tomohisa is the first ghost that Ryo ever meets that already knows that it's dead.
Well, no, technically that's a lie. He's met a lot of ghosts that know that they're dead, but they're generally insubstantial spectres who like to roam around the edges of cemetaries and the odd public bathroom (something which he hasn't, to this day, quite figured out the reasoning behind). They're generally more color and smoke and loud screechy noises than person, and Yamashita is none of these things. He's calm and quiet and his features are so clear that he almost looks alive.
He's sitting in the doorway of a shop when Ryo first spots him, hands folded over his knees as he stares out at the passing crowds. It's the military uniform that he's wearing that catches Ryo's eye.
The flash of recognition on the other's face as he meets Ryo's eyes makes him realize that the other's more than just a normal war veteran. It's that look that makes Ryo stop to talk to him, even though he's really just passing through and he really doesn't need another ghost on his plate at the moment.
"Are you lost?"
"No."
"Waiting for someone?"
"No," the ghost shrugs and looks up at him. "I just don't have anywhere to go."
There's a brief pause while Ryo mulls things over. It's so much easier when they're talkative and he doesn't have to do more than respond when appropriate.
"You're dead, too?"
"Huh?" Ryo blinks and looks around a bit stupidly then points to himself. Well, this is unexpected. "Me?"
"No, the other dead guy behind you," the ghost answers with a soft chuckle. "Yeah, you. You can see me, so I figure you have to be dead, too."
"Yeah... well, sort of." Ryo shrugs and frowns down at the other. "So you know you're dead?"
The ghost gives Ryo A Look in answer and Ryo laughs and rubs the back of his head. "Okay, stupid question. So, how long have you known?"
"I'm not sure. What month is it?"
"September."
"Then I'd say... about two years." The ghost smiles at him, lopsided and half-hearted, the kind of smile that makes you want to give the person doing it a hug.
"Damn," Ryo says instead and runs his hands through his hair awkwardly. He really doesn't know what to do with this situation. "And you're still here?"
"Like I said, nowhere better to go."
Ryo waits a beat before saying, "You could come with me, if you feel like company."
The ghost stares at him, his face blank. Ryo is just beginning to wonder if he inadvertantly committed some sort of faux pas when the ghosts stands. "Sure. Why not?"
Yamashita Tomohisa, as the ghost is known, becomes a fixture in Ryo's apartment after that. He ends up there the day that they meet and just doesn't leave. He never asks to stay and Ryo never really invites him, but Ryo prefers it this way. There's not any awkward expectation--Tomohisa can stay or he can go and Ryo doesn't feel obligated to play host and entertain him.
For all the time that he's spent around ghosts, Ryo still finds it a bit odd to live with one. Even a ghost that looks as alive as Tomohisa does is still a ghost, and they have a tendency to just disappear sometimes and drift in and out as they please.
Still, it's oddly calming coming home and knowing someone will be waiting for him. He can even ignore Nino's disapproving looks when he finds out about it. It's not like he's not doing his job. Tomohisa already knew he was dead when Ryo met him.
"You should still talk to him about it," Nino points out and Ryo hates the way he can feel his shoulders stiffen at the words.
"Aren't you the one who told me that it's their decision? Well, he decided to stay."
Nino gives him a look that's a bit too knowing for Ryo's comfort. "Suit yourself."
Ryo ignores him and changes conversation topics.
"How does it taste?" Tomohisa is watching him as they walk through the slowly emptying park, the late autumn air cold and still around them.
Ryo takes another bite of dango and shrugs. "Not bad."
"You hate it."
"No... it's okay."
Tomohisa shakes his head and Ryo's about to protest again when he realizes that the other is laughing at him. "You know you didn't have to eat it if you hate it that much."
"What?" Ryo stops and gapes at the other, the dango clutched limply between his fingers. "But you kept going on and on about how much you loved dango."
"Yeah, but I can't eat it anymore," Tomohisa points out, his smile widening. "I appreciate the gesture and all, but you don't have to eat something you hate just for me."
Ryo opens his mouth to protest but stops, glances at the remaining dango sitting all prim and proper on its little stick and sighs. "Okay, that was kind of stupid."
"Kind of?"
"Don't push it," Ryo grumbles, tossing the remainder into a nearby bush. Truth be told, it was worth the awful taste just to see the other smile like that. "Let's go home. It's cold."
Pi nods, the smile lingering. The other's footsteps are silent as they make their way out of the park, a comfortable silence surrounding them. At the edge of the park, a little girl runs past them, laughing happily as her father chases after her. Tomohisa stops and watches them, his smile growing wistful.
"It's nice, isn't it?" Tomohisa asks as they both watch the girl's father sweep her up in his arms, their laughter ringing through the crisp evening air.
"She's cute."
Tomohisa makes a soft sound of agreement and starts to walk again, his steps slow and thoughtful. "Did you have kids before you died?"
"No," Ryo answers, unable to help a laugh at the thought. "Probably a good thing, too."
"Probably," Tomohisa says with a soft laugh. They keep walking and Ryo thinks that the conversation has ended until the other speaks again. "I did."
"You did?"
"Yeah, a daughter. She was two when they shipped me out to the Pacific."
"Have you ever gone back to see her?" Ryo asks, even though he knows he probably shouldn't. If Tomohisa is here and not haunting the place that his family lives, there has to be a reason, afterall. Ghosts tend to stick close to home or other familiar places.
Then again, Tomohisa's not exactly your average dead guy.
"Once."
They fall into silence again and Ryo knows enough not to ask the other to elaborate. It isn't until they get back to the tiny apartment that they both call home that Tomohisa finally speaks again. "Natsuko."
Ryo pauses in the doorway and gives him a questioning look.
"My daughter's name," Tomohisa explains with a slight smile. "She was born in the summer."
"Really original," Ryo teases and is relieved to see Tomohisa's smile widen. "But pretty."
"Thanks," Tomohisa says, a hint of pride in his voice as he follows Ryo into the apartment.
There's a light snow falling outside when Ryo gets home and finds the apartment empty, and he knows that Tomohisa is gone. He's not really surprised by it; Tomohisa wasn't meant to stay around forever.
It doesn't stop the pang of disappointment that Ryo feels coming home to an empty apartment, though. It's almost embarrassing just how long it takes to go away.
Nino gives him a knowing look the next time he visits.
Ryo just glares at him. "Going to say 'I told you so'?"
"What good would that do? Besides, we all have to learn sometime."
"Yeah."
"Feel like grabbing a beer?"
"I hate beer," Ryo points out, but knows by Nino's smile that the other hasn't forgotten this so much as he's overlooking it, or just doesn't care. He sighs and shakes his head. "You're buying."
Ryo's shocked when Nino actually does just that.
It's ten years later when Ryo sees Tomohisa's smile again, this time for the last time.
He's on a train bound for Chiba, crowded onto a seat between two old men, listening to their friendly back and forth. It would probably be easier to just disappear and have no one see him, but he kind of enjoys the odd sense of anonymity he gets when traveling on trains, even visible like this. The train stops at a station and a group of chattering school girls claim the seat across from him, giggling behind their hands as they talk about whatever it is that teenage girls talk about.
Ryo smiles when one of them meets his eyes and she smiles back, eyes bright as her nose scrunches and the corners of her eyes crinkle with happiness. Ryo stares at her and remembers Tomohisa's laughter.
"What's your name?" Ryo asks, ignoring the 'tsk' that the old man on his right makes, presumably at Ryo's forwardness.
The girl's smile turns embarrassed but she holds his eyes as she answers. "Natsuko."
"Natsuko?"
"I was born in summer," she explains, laughing. "Really original, huh?"
Ryo smiles a smile that shows too many teeth and shakes his head slowly. "It's a pretty name."
"Thanks." She blushes prettily and looks like she's about to say something else, but the train pulls to a stop before she gets a chance. Her friends stand and she joins them, gathering her school bag over her shoulder, hesitating only a moment as one of her friends takes her hand and pulls her out of the open doors and onto the waiting platform.
Ryo's still wearing the same smile when the train reaches his stop an hour later.
3. Koyama Keiichiro
Koyama Keiichiro is the first person that Ryo knows both before and after he dies.
There's a ramen shop near Ryo's new apartment: a tiny, one-room restaurant named Ryutaro that Ryo sometimes wanders into when he's had a long day.
He's not sure how he ends up in the ramen shop the first time, considering he really doesn't eat that often anymore, but it becomes his default place to go to get away from things and think. The shop is perfect for it, really--small without being too small, homey without being too quaint. The food is decent enough that he doesn't mind eating there and, best of all, while there's usually a steady stream of customers, it's never crowded.
He doesn't even mind the overly-friendly waiter who likes to chat him up sometimes when he comes in.
"Nishikido-kun! It's been awhile."
Ryo smiles a little and nods as Koyama slides into the booth across from him. By all rights, Koyama's cheerfulness should probably be annoying, but the other is so genuine about it and legitimately nice that it's kind of endearing. Most of the time, anyway.
"I've been busy." Ryo shrugs.
"Out of town on business again?" Koyama wait for Ryo's nod and sighs, the sound wistful. "You work too hard sometimes."
"Not everyone can live off their parents, you know."
"Rude." Koyama clucks his tongue and tries to look put out, but his smile ruins the effect. "So, what'll it be?"
Ryo makes a show of staring at the menu that Koyama hands him and thinking it over while Koyama watches him with an amused tilt of his head. "Miso ramen."
"... with extra negi."
"You should at least pretend like you're asking, you know. I'm a customer."
"Would you like extra negi?"
"Yes," Ryo mumbles, the corners of his mouth twitching as he hands the menu back to a smiling Koyama.
"Coming right up."
Sometimes it's months between Ryo's visits to Ryutaro and sometimes it's mere days, but every time he goes there it's always the same cheerful chorus of voices that welcome him and the same smiling face that takes his order, teasing him gently and insisting that he eat more because he's looking too thin. The consistency of it is comforting and it reminds him a bit of going home, back when that was still an option.
It's almost a relief to be able to go there after a particularly tough day or a particularly long trip away from home, to be able to sit down and enjoy a bowl of ramen and undemanding living company.
That all changes one unseasonably cold day in March. He's just gotten back from a trip to Hokkaido and is thoroughly enjoying being back to Tokyo and civilization (even if he'd never admit as much aloud.) He heads for the Koyama family restaurant straight off the train, deciding that it's not worth the hassle and the extra five minutes it will take to drop his bag off at home.
The familiar smells greet him as he opens the shop door, but the greeting that he's become so accustomed to is noticeably absent. He frowns, notes the emptiness in the shop and the way that Koyama's father's shoulders are hunched over the stove and the noticeable lack of Koyama himself.
He frowns as he takes his seat and looks around. A young woman that has to be Koyama's older sister stops next to his table and hands him a menu. He thinks he can understand why Koyama usually deals with the customers out front now; his sister doesn't exactly come across as personable.
"Ah... can I just have a bowl of miso ramen?"
She nods, her expression neutral as she takes the menu back from him. "Anything else?"
He starts to shake his head but stops and meets her eyes with an embarrassed smile. "Actually, I hope this isn't rude but does Keiichiro-kun have the day off today? I haven't been here for awhile and I wanted to say hello."
Ryo doesn't think he's ever seen a person go as still as she does then, her knuckles white as she grips the menu and stares down at him with an unreadable look in her eyes.
"Ah... I'm sorry. It was a rude question--"
"Kei--" she cuts him off, her voice tight as she continues. "Kei died last month."
"What?" It's not the most elegant thing that Ryo's ever said, but it's all he can think to say. He may spend most of his time with dead people, but they're dead when he meets them. He doesn't have much experience with the other side of things like this.
"Your order will be ready soon." She turns and walks away without further explanation, leaving Ryo alone at the empty table.
"Nishikido-kun!"
To say that Ryo's surprised to see Koyama the next time he walks past Ryutaro would be an understatement. He stops in the middle of the sidewalk and stares at him, looking very much like someone seeing a ghost for the first time.
Koyama either chooses not to notice or honestly doesn't care, his smile lighting up his face as he closes the distance between them with a few long strides. "It's been awhile."
"Yeah... I've been away."
"Are you coming inside? I'm taking some time off from working but I could keep you company."
"Uh... no. Just ate." Ryo hopes that the lie doesn't show on his face, but he doesn't know what else to say. The last thing he wants is to have to go into that shop and have Koyama's family serve him ramen while he pretends that he's not chatting with their dead son.
"Next time, then."
"Next time," Ryo agrees, and hates the part of himself that is tempted to go find Nino and see if the other can't handle this one for him.
"Don't stay away so long this time," Koyama says, his smile just as bright now as it ever was when he was alive.
"I'll try," Ryo promises and hurries off down the sidewalk, telling himself that he is not running away, no matter what it may look like to anyone watching.
Nino, the bastard, is nowhere to be found when Ryo visits his apartment and, according to his gossipy old landlady, has paid his rent six months in advance; a sure sign that wherever he is, he's not returning anytime soon.
Ryo contemplates finding a route to and from his apartment that lets him avoid passing the Koyamas' restaurant, but is still rational enough to know that that's stupid, no matter how uncomfortable the thought of seeing Koyama again makes him. In the end he gives in and does what he knows he has to do and goes back to the shop to find Koyama.
Koyama's sitting on the curb outside the shop when Ryo finds him, a sleepy looking tabby cat stretched out in a patch of sun and warm pavement beside him. Koyama's fingers are moving over the cat's fur, petting without really touching, and the cat's purring just as happily as Ryo imagines it would if Koyama were still alive and actually able to touch its fur.
"Nishikido-kun. You didn't wait long to visit this time."
"I'm in town for a while."
Koyama smiles as Ryo takes a seat on the pavement, the cat stretched out lazily between them. It stops its purring and cracks one eye open to look at Ryo, sizing him up. It decides that he's either not a threat or just plain uninteresting and rolls over onto its back, offering its stomach with what Ryo supposes passes in cat language as a complaint.
"Is this your cat?"
Koyama nods and starts to scratch at the cat's belly. "Nyanta. He followed me home one day when I was eight and he's been here ever since."
Ryo reaches out and strokes the cat's fur lightly, surprised at the way that it arches into the touch, its purr deepening. "He's nice."
"Most of the time," Koyama agrees with a laugh.
Ryo continues stroking the cat's fur, listening to its soft purrs as he searches for the right words. He's always hated this part.
"So," Ryo begins, clearing his throat loudly. "... do you want to go for a walk? There's something I want to tell you."
Koyama takes the news surprisingly well, considering. There are tears, and Ryo might even give in and let the other hug him until they pass, but it's nothing that unreasonable, all things considered. Their walk back to the Koyama family restaurant is silent, the streets grown dark and mostly empty.
Ryo knows talking won't change anything so he doesn't bother, just keeps pace with the other, elbow bumping against Koyama's as they walk.
There's a sad sort of acceptance in Koyama's eyes when they arrive back at his family's restaurant to find the lights out and the door locked tight, the living members of the Koyama family presumably upstairs, eating their dinner and getting ready to end another long day.
"Do you think I should say goodbye?"
"Do you want to?"
Koyama stares at the lights in the upstairs windows above the shop, watching shadowy figures pass back and forth in front of them. He doesn't speak again until the light goes out and the shadows disappear. "Will you come with me?"
Ryo nods in answer and waits for Koyama to lead the way.
Koyama's never there when Ryo passes by the restaurant on his way to and from his apartment again, but every so often there's a sleepy-looking tabby cat sitting on the curve with an expectant look on its face when it sees him. Ryo always makes a point to stop for a few minutes to pet it before going about his business.
4. Kato Shigeaki
Ryo thinks Shige is the most irritating person he's ever met in his life, and he's met a lot of irritating people.
It's not so much that he's a know-it-all or that he has to argue with Ryo about everything, although that doesn't hurt; it's that he insists on haunting a library. A library. What kind of self-respecting ghost does that?
When he stops to think about it, he probably shouldn't be that surprised. It isn't as if Kato hasn't been annoying since the first time they met, afterall.
"Are you Kato Shigeaki?"
Kato turns from where he's crouched over a heavy law tome, squinting his ghostly eyes to make out the words, and gives Ryo an assessing look. "Yes."
"Great," Ryo says as he takes a seat in the empty chair across from the other with a sigh, hoping that this one goes quickly. He doesn't think he can stand being cooped up here, surrounded by dusty books and stuck up academics for very long.
"Can I help you with something?"
"Actually, I'm here to help you."
Kato blinks and gives Ryo a look that might actually make him want to squirm if he was less sure of himself. As it is, he can feel himself bristling. "Help? If you want to help leave me alone. I have a thesis to finish and my bar exam to study for."
Ryo has to literally bite his tongue to keep from verbally bitch slapping the other in answer. Who the hell does this kid think he is? "Yeah, well, I don't really want to be here either, but I have a job to do."
"Then go do it." Kato gives him a disinterested look before turning back to his book.
Ryo crosses his arms over his chest and settles into the chair, ignoring the way it digs into his back and writes off the possibility of making any plans for the next few weeks. This is going to be a tough one.
Three weeks later and Ryo really didn't know Shige any better than he had when they'd first met. He'd spent almost every daylight hour cooped up in the library, hunched over a book that he couldn't even, technically, turn the page to.
"Okay, enough of this." Ryo stands and reaches over, snapping the book in front of Shige shut and ignoring the shushing noises coming from the other library patrons around him. It wasn't like they could see him at the moment, and even if they could, he really didn't give a shit.
"What the hell, Ryo, I was--"
"Reading. Yeah, I know." Ryo crosses his arms over his chest and gives the other his most intimidating look. It was a lot easier when the other was sitting, giving Ryo a height advantage he didn't have otherwise. "If you read anymore your brain is going to rot-- or mine is. Come on, we're getting out of here."
"But--"
"Stop making excuses and come on."
Shige sighs but Ryo can hear him following as Ryo makes his way out of the library and into the spring air and sunshine. He takes a deep breath as he walks, Shige huffing and muttering something less than friendly under his breath. Ryo ignores him, not really caring what he has to say. If he was that against leaving his dusty little corner of the library he wouldn't have followed.
Ryo doesn't really have a destination planned, just lets his feet guide him. They lead him and a still-muttering Shige to a small park on the edge of campus, barely more than a couple of benches, a tired-looking fountain, and a ring of cherry trees. Ryo stops and takes a seat on one of the benches anyway, ignoring the way the paint is chipping off the wood beneath him and the annoyed sound that Shige makes in favor of watching the cherry blossoms ruffle slightly in the wind.
It's only a minute, maybe two, before Shige gives in and takes a seat beside him. Ryo thinks the other looks out of place almost, out here in the sunshine, away from the stacks of dusty books and huddled forms of his fellow academics. He looks younger, less serious, even with the way he's sitting straight backed against the bench and frowning at nothing in particular.
"Hey."
"What?" Shige keeps staring straight ahead, his back stiffening and the crease in his brow deepening at the sound of Ryo's voice.
"Shige."
"What?" Shige turns finally, his shoulders pushed back and chin jutting out defiantly as he scowls at Ryo.
"Lighten up."
Shige huffs but relaxes a little against the bench as he turns away. Ryo goes back to staring at the cherry blossoms, enjoying the fresh air and silence.
"So why did you drag me out here, anyway?" It takes Ryo a minute to realize that the question is directed at him. When he turns to look at Shige the other is still staring straight ahead, but his expression is uncertain, like he's not quite used to just sitting outside chatting with someone normally like this.
Ryo shrugs. "Why not? You can't tell me you like spending all of your time cooped up in the library like that."
"I have things to do--" Shige starts but cuts himself off and slumps back against the bench with a sigh. "It sucks sometimes but I have to do it if I want to stay ahead."
"So, why Law, then?"
"You'll laugh."
"It's that bad?" Ryo asks, unable to suppress a grin.
"No! It's just embarrassing."
"Embarrassing? Don't tell me you chose law because you lost a bet."
"No...." Shige start to fidget against the bench, his next words too low to hear.
"What?"
"Because of a girl, okay?" Shige blurts and Ryo could swear that the other's actually blushing.
"Seriously? You decided to study Law because of a girl?"
"Yeah. Well... sort of, anyway. Go ahead and laugh," Shige mumbles, his words more embarrassed than angry.
"So what was her name?" Ryo asks, his lack of laughter surprising even himself.
Shige blinks and turns, giving Ryo a wary look. He looks sort of like a stray dog trying to decide if he wants to go for the food being offered to him and risk being poisoned or ignore it and starve. "Kaori."
"Is she studying Law, too?"
Shige shakes his head, face still wary even as his posture gets less defensive. "No. We went to high school together. I kind of liked her--"
"Kind of?"
"Yeah, okay, I liked her a lot. And one day we were all talking about University and what we wanted to do and she said that she thought Law was really cool."
Ryo can't help but laugh at that. "So you decided to apply to one of the most competitive Law schools in the country because some girl you liked thought it was 'cool'?"
Shige starts to scowl but the expression dies as he meets Ryo's eyes and he laughs instead, looking as startled as Ryo at the sound. "... okay, it's dumb, I know."
"Just a bit."
"I like it, though. At first it was just something to do that would impress people but now-- I don't know, I actually enjoy it."
"So what changed?" Ryo asks, surprised that he's actually legitimately interested in the answer.
Shige's quiet for so long that Ryo thinks he might not answer and it catches him off guard when the other finally starts to speak. "We had to do a project in one of my classes on appeals cases. Everyone got an actual case and had to research it, write a paper about the possible grounds for appeal." He pauses, frowning slightly. "I hated the project at first, thought it was pretty useless. I never had any interest in criminal law, really."
"And a project you hated made you start loving Law?"
"No. Well, not entirely." Shige laughs again and the sound makes Ryo smile. "I hated the project, but the case itself was pretty interesting. The client was accused of hitting a pedestrian with his car and driving away from the scene. The victim died on the way to the hospital. Witnesses got a make and model of the vehicle and the first two letters of the license plate-- it seemed pretty cut and dry, but the guy kept claiming he was innocent. I thought it was just another crook trying to get out of serving his time, you know? But I did the reading like I was supposed to, reviewed all the court transcripts and notes and even talked to his lawyer. I wanted to get a good mark."
Shige turns to look at Ryo, a wry smile on his face and a fair bit of self-deprication in his voice. "I was doing it all for myself, but then I found out he was innocent."
"Innocent?"
"Yeah, actually innocent." Shige turns away to stare out into the park again. "And he's spent seven years of his life in jail for a crime he didn't commit, and he might never get out because he can't afford the lawyer fees."
"Wow."
"Yeah. It's cheesy, but it made me realize that it's not just about me. That what we do makes a difference-- that I could make a difference," Shige mumbles, a soft determination in his voice.
"That is pretty cheesy."
"Shut up," Shige says, but the words lack heat. "You know what the worst part is? Ever since then, I've been using all my free time to research the case and try to find a way to get the guy off."
"Seriously?"
"Yeah. There's a non-profit group that said they'd take on the case if I did the legwork for them."
Ryo looks at Shige then, really looks at him like he hasn't really bothered doing up to this point. He's just been assuming that Shige was another stuck up college kid who lived with his nose in a book because he wasn't capable of dealing with the real world until now, but the more he actually talks to Shige, the less that seems to be the case. "So that's why you're always in the library."
"Yeah. Lame, right?"
"No." Ryo shakes his head, smiling a little. "Not really."
It's funny, Ryo thinks, just how used to the library he gets. He doesn't mind the quiet or the dim lighting or the musty smell of books anymore. They're still not his favorite things in the world, but they don't outright irritate him anymore. Instead they just sort of fade into the background like some strange type of white noise, something he doesn't notice unless he stops and actually thinks about it.
Shige isn't as annoying, either. He's still stuck up and stubborn and a bit of an asshole at times, but if Ryo's honest with himself, he's most of those things, too. Now that Ryo knows more about him, he actually kind of respects him.
It's that respect that has him standing awkwardly in the rather posh looking office of some law professor that, judging by the number of plaques lining her wall, is probably pretty well known, even if Ryo's never heard of her. She has one of those faces that makes it hard to judge her actual age and a no-nonsense look about her that makes Ryo suspect her classes must be hell.
"Nishikido-kun. Have a seat, please." She motions to one of the plush leather seats with a curt nod of her head.
"Thanks." Ryo takes the seat and resists the urge to fidget.
"I'm sorry, but I have trouble keeping track of my students these days. You must be in International Trade Law with me this term?"
"Uh, no." Ryo winces, feeling more awkward and ineloquent than he has since he was ten. "I'm not a student."
"Oh. Are you interested in applying for next school year, then?"
"No," Ryo shakes his head, his voice apologetic. "I actually wanted to ask a few questions about a friend of mine who went here."
"Ah, I don't know if I feel comfortable giving out information about students without their permission. If you wanted to come back with a signed consent form I'd be happy to answer any questions you have."
"That might be hard, actually. He died about three months ago."
"Oh, I'm sorry," she says, and the sympathy in her voice actually seems genuine. She hesitates for a moment before she continues, her expression softening, "Your friend wouldn't happen to be Kato-kun, would it?"
Ryo manages to coax Shige out of the library and back to the park again, this time with only a few token complaints from the other.
"I have something for you," Ryo says without pretext as they both take a seat on the worn out park bench, earning him a curious look from the other.
"For me?" Shige isn't quite able to hide his curiosity as he glances over at Ryo.
Ryo reaches into his pocket and pulls out a piece of paper in answer and Shige watches as he unfolds it and spreads it out on the bench between them, staring down at it so he doesn't have to meet Shige's eyes. "I thought you might want to read this."
Shige nods dumbly, his eyes going from Ryo down to the page spread out against the peeling paint of the seat, his mouth moving slightly as he reads. It's a print out of a news article, one of the ones that you can find all over the place on the internet nowadays with the click of a few buttons (something which still baffles Ryo at times, even if Nino keeps insisting it's not that hard to learn). It would look just like any other news story if it weren't for the pictures, one of Shige smiling awkwardly in what looks like a photo from a school ID, and another of a middle aged man with a standard issue prisoner's haircut being embraced by his wife and child outside the gates of a prison. Besides the picture, the only thing that really stands out about it is the headline--Friends and Classmates of Aoyama Law Student Struggle to Finish His Work, Keep Memory Alive-- a big, bold declaration splashed across the top of the page.
Ryo can see Shige's hands trembling as he finishes and looks up at him, his eyes wide. "Is this true?"
"Yeah."
Ryo can't quite make sense of the look that Shige gives him before he looks away, his eyes focusing on the article as he reads over it again, no doubt taking it all in. Ryo sits quietly and lets him reread it, hoping that he did the right thing. Even after all these years he still wonders if he's not doing this wrong.
When Shige finally looks up again he knows that, at least this time, he hasn't made a mistake.
"So, I--," Shige starts, takes a deep breath, and stops, his face uncertain. Ryo can almost see the thoughts moving through his head and doesn't say anything to interrupt them. "I don't know what to say."
"'Thank you' works."
Shige smiles, the expression a more honest version of the one that's staring up at them from the paper between them, and laughs. "Shouldn't you be congratulating me instead?"
Ryo grins back at him and echoes his laughter. "Fine... congratulations. I guess you did a pretty good job."
"Thanks." Shige taps his finger against the article for emphasis. "For this."
Ryo just shrugs and tries not to look embarrassed. "You did the work. All I did was find the article."
"I did, didn't I?"
A few hours later Ryo leaves the park alone, a smile on his face and a piece of paper folded neatly in his pocket.
Pairing : Ryo/NEWS (Gen)
Rating : PG-13
Summary : In life and death, sometimes all you need is a helping hand. It takes 7 different people to teach Ryo this particular lesson.
A/N or Warnings : Warnings for character death (of a sort...) and a bit of blood. There are ghosts here. Beware.
Special love and thanks to my beta, who is a large part of the reason that this fic happened. You are an amazing person and an even more amazing friend and I don't know what I'd do without you or your hand holding and encouragement! ♥♥
Nishikido Ryo's life ends when he's 23 years old.
He's stabbed in the back by someone trying to rob him, in and out and then he's laid out against the pavement, not even enough breath left to curse as the asshole riffles through his pockets and take what little is there before running off. Ryo knows, rationally, that the guy's probably desperate and starving like a lot of other people--including Ryo himself-- are these days. Maybe he needs to feed his family or has a sick wife or kid that needs to see a doctor. Desperate times and all.
The non-rational part of Ryo can't help but hope that if the asshole does buy food that he chokes on it. Ryo's life hasn't been the most honest of lives up to this point, either; he lies, he cheats, he steals if he has to-- but he's never hurt anyone, never left them bleeding their life out in a dirty alleyway. He may be a crook, but he still thinks it's a pretty rotten thing to do to a person.
A few more labored breaths later and he's dead, without the time to really be scared or contemplate his life, or do much more than marvel at how quickly the blood is soaking through his shirt and running out onto the pavement around him.
An unglamorous death to go along with an unglamorous life.
Still, it was his unglamorous life, and he can't help but feel like something was stolen from him. It pisses him off.
He stays with his body as it cools in the night time air, the blood turning odd, dark colors as it thickens against the pavement, and wonders if this is the part where he vows revenge and becomes one of those angry ghosts that his older brothers used to tell him stories about on late summer nights.
He'd been so scared of ghosts back then (and maybe up until recently, but he isn't going to admit it to anyone), and now he is one. It might be funny if he wasn't the one living it. Or not living it, as it were.
"You're not a ghost."
The voice is soft, tone even and devoid of any indication that the speaker notices the dead body lying on the bloody pavement. It's a mere statement of fact, an observation. It makes the whole situation seem that much more surreal. Ryo wonders for a moment if, maybe, he's had too much to drink and this is actually all a dream that he'll wake up and barely remember tomorrow.
He shakes the thought out of his head and turns to seek out the source of the voice with a frown.
"Who are you?" The words are out of Ryo's mouth before he's even finished turning, his mouth turning downwards into a frown as he catches site of the unfamiliar figure leaning casually against the alley wall.
He's slightly shorter than Ryo, a fact which Ryo can't help but feel slightly smug over. He's got one of those faces that makes it hard to judge his age, but Ryo feels pretty safe putting him around the same age that he is. His dark eyes speak of experience and look out of place with the impishness of his features.
It all seems incredibly bland given the situation, like he's simply out for an evening stroll and happening upon a dead body and a lingering ghost is just part of the routine.
"You're not a ghost," the stranger repeats, lips quirking up on one side, just enough to give the impression of a smirk without really being one.
Ryo blinks, not quite sure what to make of the conversation-- if it could qualify as that. "I'm pretty sure that that's my body and blood all over the pavement. Unless this is some kind of bad dream, I'm dead."
"Oh, you're dead," the stranger agrees, his eyes flickering to the body and then away again just as quickly. "Very dead, I'd say. But being dead doesn't mean you're a ghost."
"Then what the hell am I?" Ryo shoots back, annoyed with the nonchalant way the other is talking about this, like it happens everyday.
Well, okay. People do die everyday, but those people aren't him, and this guy has to come along and start arguing with him about whether or not he's dead before his body's even done bleeding. It's irritating, to say the least.
"I never argued with you about whether you were dead," the stranger points out, his smirk widening.
"Stop that," Ryo mutters, scowling at him. "It's really hard to have a conversation with you when you keep changing the subject and... reading my mind, or whatever it is you're doing."
"Sorry."
Ryo doesn't think he sounds sorry in the least (and he really does hope the other can read his mind and caught that one, dammit). "If I'm not a ghost then what in the hell am I?"
"You know how in ghost stories there's always the 'other'? Something that's not quite human, but not a ghost, either?"
Ryo frowns but nods, not liking the particular direction of this conversation.
"That's me... and now you."
"So I'm, what... some sort of boogeyman?"
"I think 'shinigami' is what the kids are calling us these days." The other shrugs slightly at Ryo's look of disbelief. "It's as good a name as any, I guess. To tell you the truth, I don't think there is a word for what we are."
Well, this is just great. Not only is he dead, but he's a... nothing. "So you're one... whatever this is, too?"
"Yep."
"Are you here to take me to the other side, then?" Ryo glances back at his body and sighs. He doesn't really feel much of an attachment to it, but he is oddly reluctant to just leave it there like that, unsure if anyone will find it and, once they do, if there will even be anyone to care that he's dead.
"Nothing that dramatic," the stranger assures him, and Ryo can practically hear the laughter in his voice. "Unless you consider Tokyo the other side."
"Tokyo?" Ryo doesn't even try to keep the disdain out of his voice.
"Spoken like a true Kansai boy."
It takes two weeks for Ryo to actually find out the stranger's name, and even then it's only a fluke. The bastard seems to like annoying Ryo in any way he can, and withholding his name is just another way to do just that. Ryo has taken to calling him 'The Mole' because of the rather noticeable one on his chin. Sadly, the nickname doesn't annoy him nearly as much as Ryo wants it to.
"Hey, Nino!"
Ryo is too busy staring into his bowl of ramen and blatantly ignoring his lunch partner to really register that the words are directed at the man sitting across the table. He shifts the noodles around with his chopsticks, sighing inwardly. It seems unfair that he gets to eat regularly for the first time in his life (or not-life, as is the case), and he doesn't even need too. He doesn't really see the point of eating just for the sake of eating.
"Hey, Yoko." The Mole stops mid-bite and grins as the new arrival claps him on the shoulder and plops down onto an empty chair. "On business?"
"Yeah, Junno called in a favor I owed him."
Ryo blinks, staring at the new addition to their table for a long moment before it clicks and he gives The Mole a sour look. "Your name is Nino?"
Yoko is all smiles as he looks at Ryo and then back at Nino again, wagging his finger at him and clucking his tongue. "You didn't even tell him your name?"
Nino-- Ryo's almost disappointed that his name isn't something more sinister or interesting, but he guesses 'Ryo' really isn't the world's most intimidating name for an unnamed supernatural being, either-- just smiles back and shrugs. "Didn't seem important."
"So mean," Yoko sighs, the sympathy in his voice not quite matching the grin that he's still wearing. "So, you must be Ryo-chan." He extends his hand and Ryo ignores it in favor of bowing his head.
"Just Ryo. And you're... Yoko?"
"Ah! So you've heard about me?"
"No," Ryo answers honestly, feeling only slightly bad at the way the other man's grin falters a little at the admission. He's just being honest, afterall.
It doesn't take long for Yoko's smile to bounce back, though. "Ah, well, I'm Yoko. We'll be working together at some point, I'm sure."
"Just Yoko?"
"Yokoyama Kimitaka," he amends, the name sounding rusty, unused. "We don't really use our full names."
"'We'?" Ryo can't help but ask, trying not to look too eager and give Nino the satisfaction.
"Yeah... people like us," Yoko explains, laughing as he turns to Nino. "Geez, Nino, haven't you taught this kid anything?"
Nino just smiles. Ryo is tempted to stab him with his chopstick, but then decides it probably wouldn't do much good since he's already dead.
"I guess I get to teach you the trade," Nino says out of the blue later that night.
Ryo is tempted to pretend that he's asleep, but his curiosity wins out and he finds himself rolling over to stare at Nino through the dark. "The trade?"
"If you hadn't noticed, we don't sleep, so that trick is never going to work." Nino grins and Ryo glares at him, wishing there were some way to keep the other out of his head.
"Would you just answer the damn question?"
"Dead people," Nino answers. "Our business is dead people. Ghosts, to be exact."
"Ghosts? What do we do with ghosts?" Ryo asks with a frown.
Nino shrugs and smiles. "Whatever they need us to do with them."
Ryo sighs and wonders how, out of all the dead people there have to be in Japan, he ended up with this one for a teacher.
"What's this?" Ryo looks down at the worn piece of paper that Nino has laid out on the table between them, the writing hard to make out in the dim light of their only lantern. He squints and leans closer, mouthing the syllables as he reads it off: Yonehana, Nagasawa, Ikuta. It goes on for a few more lines, a list of names that mean nothing to him at all. "Are these the people I have to find?"
Nino shakes his head and laughs. "No, you don't get a list. It's not that easy."
"Then what is this?"
"A reminder," Nino answers, his face devoid of its usual smirk as he refolds the paper and tucks it between the pages of a book of ghost stories. Ryo would point out just how cliche it is that that happens to be the only book that they own between the two of them, but Nino would probably just find it amusing and tell him to stop being so serious. "You're going to learn a lot of new names doing this and you'll forget most of them."
"So I have to write them down?"
"No, that would take a lot more paper than this." Nino laughs and taps the cover of the book lightly with his finger. His face goes oddly serious as he continues. "These are just the ones that I can't forget. You'll have a list like this, too, eventually."
Ryo doesn't really understand completely but he nods anyway and they fall back into silence.
He forgets about the strange conversation and Nino's wrinkled piece of paper until he realizes, one day, that he's started keeping a list of his own. It's not written on a piece of paper and pressed between the pages of a book like Nino's, but it's still just as real. He keeps it locked away inside his head, hidden between his memories; seven names and faces that he can't forget.
It isn't until he mentions it to Nino one night years later as they sit on a rooftop sipping warm beer that he realizes he really doesn't want to.
1. Uchi Hiroki
The first time Ryo returns to his home town after his death, he meets Uchi Hiroki.
It's Yoko's fault, of course. He'd been down visiting Yoko in Osaka when the other had given him some sob story about not having time to take care of a job he had in Kadoma, and Ryo, being the schmuck that he is, had taken the bait and agreed to help him out. In retrospect, he probably should have known that he was being set up. Yoko had been hinting the last few times that Ryo had seen him that he should make a point to visit his hometown again, just for closure, hints that Ryo had steadfastly ignored, and Yoko is just the type to know that Ryo would be more likely to go if he had a job there.
He's willing to bet the bastard isn't even busy. He's probably sitting at home laughing at Ryo's stupidity.
Sometimes Yoko is almost worse than Nino.
He finds Uchi in a shop in the older part of town. He knows he's in the right place when he reads the character scrawled on the worn wooden sign above the door and catches a gimpse of brightly patterned silk through the partially opened door. He hesitates for just a moment before he slides the door the rest of the way open and steps inside, muttering a quick "please excuse me" under his breath.
"Ah... I'm sorry, but we're closed today, sir. We should be open again next week if you'd like to come back."
"Oh, I didn't realize," Ryo says, looking up to find the ghost of a young man who can't be a day over 20 staring back at him. He tries his friendliest smile. "Will you be open again soon?"
"We should be," the ghost answers, stepping out from between the displays, his smile just as stiff as his movements. "There's an illness in the family."
"Ah... sorry to hear that," Ryo says, bowing his head slightly. "I'll come back in a few days, then."
"Please do."
They trade polite goodbyes and bow their heads at each other before Ryo turns and steps out the way he came, deciding to give it two days tops before he returns. If he plays his cards right this could still be a quick one.
"I'm sorry, but we're-- oh, it's you again."
"Still closed?" Ryo asks as he slides the door shut behind him, already knowing what answer he's going to get. 'Dead' is not exactly an easy illness to cure, afterall.
"Yes." The ghost's eyes are sad as he steps forward into the room and bows his head in apology. "I'm sorry. There's another shop on the northern end of town. I can give you directions."
"Ah, yes. I've heard of them, but a friend recommended your shop specifically. He said you were the best." Ryo smiles and wonders when, exactly, it got so easy to lie. His brothers would be impressed, considering just how bad he was at it growing up.
"Really? Well... I guess I could make an exception, then. Just don't tell anyone." The ghost smiles a little, then, and Ryo thinks that if ghosts could blush this one would be.
"My lips are sealed, Uchi-san."
"Hiroki. You can call me Hiroki. 'Uchi-san' makes me feel old."
"Hiroki," Ryo repeats with a smile. "I'm Ryo. Nishikido Ryo."
Ryo goes home a few hours later with an expensive new yukata and an invitation to tea the next day.
It doesn't take Ryo long to get to know Hiroki, but that's not really much of a surprise to him. Ghosts are by nature lonely creatures, and they're so eager to have someone actually talk to them that it's generally not that hard to get to know them. Earning their trust is a bit harder, but it's something that Ryo's gotten good at over the years.
He is pretty surprised, however, when he realizes that he actually likes Hiroki.
It's not that he's disliked everyone that he's helped before this; it's just that he's never really felt a connection to any of them. Hiroki, on the other hand, feels like an old friend. Ryo finds himself laughing more around Hiroki than he has in all the years that he's been dead. Hiroki's also one of the first ghosts that he actually wants to get to know for the sake of knowing him and not because he has to.
He finds himself spending more and more time with the other and ignores that nagging voice in the back of his head that likes to remind him that he came here to do a job. He knows that he has to tell Hiroki the truth, but he keeps telling himself that it can wait a little longer, that Hiroki's not ready yet.
It's a Friday night and they're sitting on the floor in Uchi's room, a bottle of sake sitting on the table and two cups on the floor between them. Hiroki is telling (another) story about his mother and Ryo is listening quietly, more entertained by the other's enthusiasm than by the story itself.
"Wait... your mom used to dress you like a girl? That explains a lot."
"No." Hiroki frowns and stiffens a little, his face getting that over protective look that it always does when someone says something that might be a slight against his mother. "I was the one who wanted to wear it."
"That doesn't make it much better."
Uchi gives Ryo a dirty look but seems to realize that he hasn't really done himself any favors by clearing his mother's name. "Yeah, well, kids are weird. I bet you were a weird kid, too."
Ryo shakes his head. "I've always been this awesome."
"Liar." Uchi snorts and goes quiet for a moment before he speaks again, his voice thoughtful. "So, what about your family? You never talk about them."
"What about them?"
"I don't know-- do you have any siblings? What does your dad do? What's your mom like? You never talk about them." Hiroki's face in genuinely curious as he stretches his legs out across the tatami, his foot brushing against Ryo's thigh as he waits.
Ryo shrugs and reaches for his glass, taking a sip as he tries to stall. "They're dead."
"All of them? Shit... I'm sorry. I wouldn't have asked--"
"You didn't know," Ryo points out with a shrug and a weak smile. He wants to point out that it doesn't really matter because he's dead, too, but that would require an explanation that he really doesn't want to give at the moment.
"Still... I'm sorry." Hiroki bites his lip and presses his foot against Ryo's thigh. "I don't know what I'd do if that happened. Things have been bad enough since mom got sick."
"It's okay," Ryo says, more out of reflex than anything.
There's a moment of awkward silence where neither of them seem quite sure what to say. Hiroki breaks it just as the air around them is starting to get a bit too heavy. "Hey... are you still going to be in town next week?"
"Yeah. Why?"
"I thought we could go to the festival together."
"Only if you promise not to wear that girly yukata I've seen lying around here."
"My mom made that, you know."
"That explains a lot." Ryo winces as Uchi jabs him in the side with his big toe, but doesn't make an effort to supress his laughter.
As he's walking home that night, he tells himself that waiting another day or two to tell Uchi the truth won't hurt anything.
In the end it doesn't matter what Ryo tells himself, because Ryo doesn't have to tell Uchi he's dead; he finds out from his mother instead.
It's the day of the town festival and the excitement in the air is infectious. The streets are lined with lanterns and full of people hurrying back and forth, scrambling to finish all their last minute preparations. By the time he gets to the Uchi family shop and slips inside Ryo is grinning and feeling an eagerness he doesn't remember feeling since he was a kid.
That feeling abruptly dies when he gets to Hiroki's room and finds him sitting on the floor, staring blankly at the wall. He doesn't even blink when Ryo greets him, doesn't stir when Ryo stops in front of him and asks what's wrong. It's a full minute before he says anything, and in that minute Ryo can feel the ball of worry forming in the pit of his stomach.
"My aunt came to visit," Hiroki says finally, his voice soft and his eyes still staring blankly at the wall. "She was talking with my mother in the kitchen, said my mom needed to move on, that mourning wasn't going to bring me back."
Ryo feels his heart sink and wonder which makes him feel worse-- the fact that Hiroki had to find out like this, or the fact that he'd found out at all.
"I'm dead, aren't I?" Hiroki looks up at him then, his mouth curving downwards at the corners, eyes searching Ryo's face.
Ryo nods and looks down at his feet, not trusting his voice at the moment. He tries to remind himself that it's just a job, something he's done hundreds of times before and that Hiroki could be screaming or crying or could have just disappeared, the way that some do. It could be so much worse, really. He knows rationally that all these things are true, but it doesn't make the lump in his throat any less real.
"How long?"
"A few months."
"When mom got sick. Or not sick, I guess. Just sad. That explains all the crying."
"Yeah."
He watches as Hiroki bows his head and draws his legs up against his chest, his brow furrowed and eyes distant. He doesn't ask Ryo again, doesn't really say much of anything.
Ryo ignores the urge to put an arm around him and goes to the window, staring down at the street as the silence drags on around them. If there's one thing that being dead has taught him, it's patience.
The shadows in the street are already lengthening when Uchi finally stands again and closes the distance between them to take Ryo's hand. Ryo turns, frowning a little as he tightens his hand around the other's automatically.
"Hiroki?"
"Shut up." Hiroki tugs at Ryo's hand and pulls him towards the door. The look on his face is determined enough that Ryo does just that, letting himself be dragged out of the building and out onto the street.
Around them, lanterns are being lit and families are emerging from their homes, full of smiles and laughter and dressed in their festival best. He sees a mother crouching down, adjusting the obi on her daughter's yukata as the little girl squirms, obviously eager for them to be on their way.
They bypass the stalls and head away from the sights and smells and sounds of the festival, out to a dark, empty spot along the riverbank. Hiroki sits down in the grass and tugs at Ryo's hand until he has no choice but to take a seat beside him.
The riverbank is silent save for the steady hum of cicadas and the distant drone of the festival and the soft sound of Uchi's breathing. Ryo turns to look at him, watches him stare out at the river and the quickly darkening sky.
The first stars have already started to show when Uchi finally speaks. "I just want to see them one more time."
"See what?" Ryo asks, but the loud crack and the sudden explosion of color and light against the sky is all the answer he needs. He doesn't say anything after that, just tilts his head towards the sky, trying to remember the last time he'd actually taken the time to watch fireworks like this. After the first few, Hiroki lays his head against Ryo's shoulder and starts to hum a festival song, something that Ryo knows all the words to but can't remember the name. He remembers singing it with his family as a child.
They stay like that, huddled together in companionable silence until the show ends. Ryo thinks about his family, thinks about his life as it is now and about Hiroki and finally understands what Nino meant when he said that it was probably for the best that they didn't have any real power to change things, because right now, if he had that power, he'd want to use it.
Hiroki stops humming with the last of the fireworks and picks his head up off of Ryo's shoulder with a sigh. "Will you do me a favor?"
Anything, Ryo almost says, but just bites his tongue and nods slowly. "If it's something that I can do, yes."
"You'd say 'no' to a dead man?" Hiroki asks with a faint laugh. "You're the worst."
Ryo chuckles and shakes his head. "I'm not god here, you know."
"No, god would be better at this," Hiroki teases, turning to meet Ryo's eyes as he continues. "Don't worry, I won't ask you to bring me back to life. I just want you to watch them for me next year. The fireworks, I mean. I want to know someone else is watching them even if I can't."
"I will."
Ryo keeps his eyes fixed on the scattered lanterns across the river, as he hears more than sees Hiroki stand and brush non-existant dirt from his clothing. Nothing sticks to you when you're dead, but old habits die hard.
"Thanks," Hiroki murmurs just before Ryo hears him start to walk away.
"You, too," Ryo answers. By the time he turns his head to look behind him, the other's already gone.
2. Yamashita Tomohisa
Yamashita Tomohisa is the first ghost that Ryo ever meets that already knows that it's dead.
Well, no, technically that's a lie. He's met a lot of ghosts that know that they're dead, but they're generally insubstantial spectres who like to roam around the edges of cemetaries and the odd public bathroom (something which he hasn't, to this day, quite figured out the reasoning behind). They're generally more color and smoke and loud screechy noises than person, and Yamashita is none of these things. He's calm and quiet and his features are so clear that he almost looks alive.
He's sitting in the doorway of a shop when Ryo first spots him, hands folded over his knees as he stares out at the passing crowds. It's the military uniform that he's wearing that catches Ryo's eye.
The flash of recognition on the other's face as he meets Ryo's eyes makes him realize that the other's more than just a normal war veteran. It's that look that makes Ryo stop to talk to him, even though he's really just passing through and he really doesn't need another ghost on his plate at the moment.
"Are you lost?"
"No."
"Waiting for someone?"
"No," the ghost shrugs and looks up at him. "I just don't have anywhere to go."
There's a brief pause while Ryo mulls things over. It's so much easier when they're talkative and he doesn't have to do more than respond when appropriate.
"You're dead, too?"
"Huh?" Ryo blinks and looks around a bit stupidly then points to himself. Well, this is unexpected. "Me?"
"No, the other dead guy behind you," the ghost answers with a soft chuckle. "Yeah, you. You can see me, so I figure you have to be dead, too."
"Yeah... well, sort of." Ryo shrugs and frowns down at the other. "So you know you're dead?"
The ghost gives Ryo A Look in answer and Ryo laughs and rubs the back of his head. "Okay, stupid question. So, how long have you known?"
"I'm not sure. What month is it?"
"September."
"Then I'd say... about two years." The ghost smiles at him, lopsided and half-hearted, the kind of smile that makes you want to give the person doing it a hug.
"Damn," Ryo says instead and runs his hands through his hair awkwardly. He really doesn't know what to do with this situation. "And you're still here?"
"Like I said, nowhere better to go."
Ryo waits a beat before saying, "You could come with me, if you feel like company."
The ghost stares at him, his face blank. Ryo is just beginning to wonder if he inadvertantly committed some sort of faux pas when the ghosts stands. "Sure. Why not?"
Yamashita Tomohisa, as the ghost is known, becomes a fixture in Ryo's apartment after that. He ends up there the day that they meet and just doesn't leave. He never asks to stay and Ryo never really invites him, but Ryo prefers it this way. There's not any awkward expectation--Tomohisa can stay or he can go and Ryo doesn't feel obligated to play host and entertain him.
For all the time that he's spent around ghosts, Ryo still finds it a bit odd to live with one. Even a ghost that looks as alive as Tomohisa does is still a ghost, and they have a tendency to just disappear sometimes and drift in and out as they please.
Still, it's oddly calming coming home and knowing someone will be waiting for him. He can even ignore Nino's disapproving looks when he finds out about it. It's not like he's not doing his job. Tomohisa already knew he was dead when Ryo met him.
"You should still talk to him about it," Nino points out and Ryo hates the way he can feel his shoulders stiffen at the words.
"Aren't you the one who told me that it's their decision? Well, he decided to stay."
Nino gives him a look that's a bit too knowing for Ryo's comfort. "Suit yourself."
Ryo ignores him and changes conversation topics.
"How does it taste?" Tomohisa is watching him as they walk through the slowly emptying park, the late autumn air cold and still around them.
Ryo takes another bite of dango and shrugs. "Not bad."
"You hate it."
"No... it's okay."
Tomohisa shakes his head and Ryo's about to protest again when he realizes that the other is laughing at him. "You know you didn't have to eat it if you hate it that much."
"What?" Ryo stops and gapes at the other, the dango clutched limply between his fingers. "But you kept going on and on about how much you loved dango."
"Yeah, but I can't eat it anymore," Tomohisa points out, his smile widening. "I appreciate the gesture and all, but you don't have to eat something you hate just for me."
Ryo opens his mouth to protest but stops, glances at the remaining dango sitting all prim and proper on its little stick and sighs. "Okay, that was kind of stupid."
"Kind of?"
"Don't push it," Ryo grumbles, tossing the remainder into a nearby bush. Truth be told, it was worth the awful taste just to see the other smile like that. "Let's go home. It's cold."
Pi nods, the smile lingering. The other's footsteps are silent as they make their way out of the park, a comfortable silence surrounding them. At the edge of the park, a little girl runs past them, laughing happily as her father chases after her. Tomohisa stops and watches them, his smile growing wistful.
"It's nice, isn't it?" Tomohisa asks as they both watch the girl's father sweep her up in his arms, their laughter ringing through the crisp evening air.
"She's cute."
Tomohisa makes a soft sound of agreement and starts to walk again, his steps slow and thoughtful. "Did you have kids before you died?"
"No," Ryo answers, unable to help a laugh at the thought. "Probably a good thing, too."
"Probably," Tomohisa says with a soft laugh. They keep walking and Ryo thinks that the conversation has ended until the other speaks again. "I did."
"You did?"
"Yeah, a daughter. She was two when they shipped me out to the Pacific."
"Have you ever gone back to see her?" Ryo asks, even though he knows he probably shouldn't. If Tomohisa is here and not haunting the place that his family lives, there has to be a reason, afterall. Ghosts tend to stick close to home or other familiar places.
Then again, Tomohisa's not exactly your average dead guy.
"Once."
They fall into silence again and Ryo knows enough not to ask the other to elaborate. It isn't until they get back to the tiny apartment that they both call home that Tomohisa finally speaks again. "Natsuko."
Ryo pauses in the doorway and gives him a questioning look.
"My daughter's name," Tomohisa explains with a slight smile. "She was born in the summer."
"Really original," Ryo teases and is relieved to see Tomohisa's smile widen. "But pretty."
"Thanks," Tomohisa says, a hint of pride in his voice as he follows Ryo into the apartment.
There's a light snow falling outside when Ryo gets home and finds the apartment empty, and he knows that Tomohisa is gone. He's not really surprised by it; Tomohisa wasn't meant to stay around forever.
It doesn't stop the pang of disappointment that Ryo feels coming home to an empty apartment, though. It's almost embarrassing just how long it takes to go away.
Nino gives him a knowing look the next time he visits.
Ryo just glares at him. "Going to say 'I told you so'?"
"What good would that do? Besides, we all have to learn sometime."
"Yeah."
"Feel like grabbing a beer?"
"I hate beer," Ryo points out, but knows by Nino's smile that the other hasn't forgotten this so much as he's overlooking it, or just doesn't care. He sighs and shakes his head. "You're buying."
Ryo's shocked when Nino actually does just that.
It's ten years later when Ryo sees Tomohisa's smile again, this time for the last time.
He's on a train bound for Chiba, crowded onto a seat between two old men, listening to their friendly back and forth. It would probably be easier to just disappear and have no one see him, but he kind of enjoys the odd sense of anonymity he gets when traveling on trains, even visible like this. The train stops at a station and a group of chattering school girls claim the seat across from him, giggling behind their hands as they talk about whatever it is that teenage girls talk about.
Ryo smiles when one of them meets his eyes and she smiles back, eyes bright as her nose scrunches and the corners of her eyes crinkle with happiness. Ryo stares at her and remembers Tomohisa's laughter.
"What's your name?" Ryo asks, ignoring the 'tsk' that the old man on his right makes, presumably at Ryo's forwardness.
The girl's smile turns embarrassed but she holds his eyes as she answers. "Natsuko."
"Natsuko?"
"I was born in summer," she explains, laughing. "Really original, huh?"
Ryo smiles a smile that shows too many teeth and shakes his head slowly. "It's a pretty name."
"Thanks." She blushes prettily and looks like she's about to say something else, but the train pulls to a stop before she gets a chance. Her friends stand and she joins them, gathering her school bag over her shoulder, hesitating only a moment as one of her friends takes her hand and pulls her out of the open doors and onto the waiting platform.
Ryo's still wearing the same smile when the train reaches his stop an hour later.
3. Koyama Keiichiro
Koyama Keiichiro is the first person that Ryo knows both before and after he dies.
There's a ramen shop near Ryo's new apartment: a tiny, one-room restaurant named Ryutaro that Ryo sometimes wanders into when he's had a long day.
He's not sure how he ends up in the ramen shop the first time, considering he really doesn't eat that often anymore, but it becomes his default place to go to get away from things and think. The shop is perfect for it, really--small without being too small, homey without being too quaint. The food is decent enough that he doesn't mind eating there and, best of all, while there's usually a steady stream of customers, it's never crowded.
He doesn't even mind the overly-friendly waiter who likes to chat him up sometimes when he comes in.
"Nishikido-kun! It's been awhile."
Ryo smiles a little and nods as Koyama slides into the booth across from him. By all rights, Koyama's cheerfulness should probably be annoying, but the other is so genuine about it and legitimately nice that it's kind of endearing. Most of the time, anyway.
"I've been busy." Ryo shrugs.
"Out of town on business again?" Koyama wait for Ryo's nod and sighs, the sound wistful. "You work too hard sometimes."
"Not everyone can live off their parents, you know."
"Rude." Koyama clucks his tongue and tries to look put out, but his smile ruins the effect. "So, what'll it be?"
Ryo makes a show of staring at the menu that Koyama hands him and thinking it over while Koyama watches him with an amused tilt of his head. "Miso ramen."
"... with extra negi."
"You should at least pretend like you're asking, you know. I'm a customer."
"Would you like extra negi?"
"Yes," Ryo mumbles, the corners of his mouth twitching as he hands the menu back to a smiling Koyama.
"Coming right up."
Sometimes it's months between Ryo's visits to Ryutaro and sometimes it's mere days, but every time he goes there it's always the same cheerful chorus of voices that welcome him and the same smiling face that takes his order, teasing him gently and insisting that he eat more because he's looking too thin. The consistency of it is comforting and it reminds him a bit of going home, back when that was still an option.
It's almost a relief to be able to go there after a particularly tough day or a particularly long trip away from home, to be able to sit down and enjoy a bowl of ramen and undemanding living company.
That all changes one unseasonably cold day in March. He's just gotten back from a trip to Hokkaido and is thoroughly enjoying being back to Tokyo and civilization (even if he'd never admit as much aloud.) He heads for the Koyama family restaurant straight off the train, deciding that it's not worth the hassle and the extra five minutes it will take to drop his bag off at home.
The familiar smells greet him as he opens the shop door, but the greeting that he's become so accustomed to is noticeably absent. He frowns, notes the emptiness in the shop and the way that Koyama's father's shoulders are hunched over the stove and the noticeable lack of Koyama himself.
He frowns as he takes his seat and looks around. A young woman that has to be Koyama's older sister stops next to his table and hands him a menu. He thinks he can understand why Koyama usually deals with the customers out front now; his sister doesn't exactly come across as personable.
"Ah... can I just have a bowl of miso ramen?"
She nods, her expression neutral as she takes the menu back from him. "Anything else?"
He starts to shake his head but stops and meets her eyes with an embarrassed smile. "Actually, I hope this isn't rude but does Keiichiro-kun have the day off today? I haven't been here for awhile and I wanted to say hello."
Ryo doesn't think he's ever seen a person go as still as she does then, her knuckles white as she grips the menu and stares down at him with an unreadable look in her eyes.
"Ah... I'm sorry. It was a rude question--"
"Kei--" she cuts him off, her voice tight as she continues. "Kei died last month."
"What?" It's not the most elegant thing that Ryo's ever said, but it's all he can think to say. He may spend most of his time with dead people, but they're dead when he meets them. He doesn't have much experience with the other side of things like this.
"Your order will be ready soon." She turns and walks away without further explanation, leaving Ryo alone at the empty table.
"Nishikido-kun!"
To say that Ryo's surprised to see Koyama the next time he walks past Ryutaro would be an understatement. He stops in the middle of the sidewalk and stares at him, looking very much like someone seeing a ghost for the first time.
Koyama either chooses not to notice or honestly doesn't care, his smile lighting up his face as he closes the distance between them with a few long strides. "It's been awhile."
"Yeah... I've been away."
"Are you coming inside? I'm taking some time off from working but I could keep you company."
"Uh... no. Just ate." Ryo hopes that the lie doesn't show on his face, but he doesn't know what else to say. The last thing he wants is to have to go into that shop and have Koyama's family serve him ramen while he pretends that he's not chatting with their dead son.
"Next time, then."
"Next time," Ryo agrees, and hates the part of himself that is tempted to go find Nino and see if the other can't handle this one for him.
"Don't stay away so long this time," Koyama says, his smile just as bright now as it ever was when he was alive.
"I'll try," Ryo promises and hurries off down the sidewalk, telling himself that he is not running away, no matter what it may look like to anyone watching.
Nino, the bastard, is nowhere to be found when Ryo visits his apartment and, according to his gossipy old landlady, has paid his rent six months in advance; a sure sign that wherever he is, he's not returning anytime soon.
Ryo contemplates finding a route to and from his apartment that lets him avoid passing the Koyamas' restaurant, but is still rational enough to know that that's stupid, no matter how uncomfortable the thought of seeing Koyama again makes him. In the end he gives in and does what he knows he has to do and goes back to the shop to find Koyama.
Koyama's sitting on the curb outside the shop when Ryo finds him, a sleepy looking tabby cat stretched out in a patch of sun and warm pavement beside him. Koyama's fingers are moving over the cat's fur, petting without really touching, and the cat's purring just as happily as Ryo imagines it would if Koyama were still alive and actually able to touch its fur.
"Nishikido-kun. You didn't wait long to visit this time."
"I'm in town for a while."
Koyama smiles as Ryo takes a seat on the pavement, the cat stretched out lazily between them. It stops its purring and cracks one eye open to look at Ryo, sizing him up. It decides that he's either not a threat or just plain uninteresting and rolls over onto its back, offering its stomach with what Ryo supposes passes in cat language as a complaint.
"Is this your cat?"
Koyama nods and starts to scratch at the cat's belly. "Nyanta. He followed me home one day when I was eight and he's been here ever since."
Ryo reaches out and strokes the cat's fur lightly, surprised at the way that it arches into the touch, its purr deepening. "He's nice."
"Most of the time," Koyama agrees with a laugh.
Ryo continues stroking the cat's fur, listening to its soft purrs as he searches for the right words. He's always hated this part.
"So," Ryo begins, clearing his throat loudly. "... do you want to go for a walk? There's something I want to tell you."
Koyama takes the news surprisingly well, considering. There are tears, and Ryo might even give in and let the other hug him until they pass, but it's nothing that unreasonable, all things considered. Their walk back to the Koyama family restaurant is silent, the streets grown dark and mostly empty.
Ryo knows talking won't change anything so he doesn't bother, just keeps pace with the other, elbow bumping against Koyama's as they walk.
There's a sad sort of acceptance in Koyama's eyes when they arrive back at his family's restaurant to find the lights out and the door locked tight, the living members of the Koyama family presumably upstairs, eating their dinner and getting ready to end another long day.
"Do you think I should say goodbye?"
"Do you want to?"
Koyama stares at the lights in the upstairs windows above the shop, watching shadowy figures pass back and forth in front of them. He doesn't speak again until the light goes out and the shadows disappear. "Will you come with me?"
Ryo nods in answer and waits for Koyama to lead the way.
Koyama's never there when Ryo passes by the restaurant on his way to and from his apartment again, but every so often there's a sleepy-looking tabby cat sitting on the curve with an expectant look on its face when it sees him. Ryo always makes a point to stop for a few minutes to pet it before going about his business.
4. Kato Shigeaki
Ryo thinks Shige is the most irritating person he's ever met in his life, and he's met a lot of irritating people.
It's not so much that he's a know-it-all or that he has to argue with Ryo about everything, although that doesn't hurt; it's that he insists on haunting a library. A library. What kind of self-respecting ghost does that?
When he stops to think about it, he probably shouldn't be that surprised. It isn't as if Kato hasn't been annoying since the first time they met, afterall.
"Are you Kato Shigeaki?"
Kato turns from where he's crouched over a heavy law tome, squinting his ghostly eyes to make out the words, and gives Ryo an assessing look. "Yes."
"Great," Ryo says as he takes a seat in the empty chair across from the other with a sigh, hoping that this one goes quickly. He doesn't think he can stand being cooped up here, surrounded by dusty books and stuck up academics for very long.
"Can I help you with something?"
"Actually, I'm here to help you."
Kato blinks and gives Ryo a look that might actually make him want to squirm if he was less sure of himself. As it is, he can feel himself bristling. "Help? If you want to help leave me alone. I have a thesis to finish and my bar exam to study for."
Ryo has to literally bite his tongue to keep from verbally bitch slapping the other in answer. Who the hell does this kid think he is? "Yeah, well, I don't really want to be here either, but I have a job to do."
"Then go do it." Kato gives him a disinterested look before turning back to his book.
Ryo crosses his arms over his chest and settles into the chair, ignoring the way it digs into his back and writes off the possibility of making any plans for the next few weeks. This is going to be a tough one.
Three weeks later and Ryo really didn't know Shige any better than he had when they'd first met. He'd spent almost every daylight hour cooped up in the library, hunched over a book that he couldn't even, technically, turn the page to.
"Okay, enough of this." Ryo stands and reaches over, snapping the book in front of Shige shut and ignoring the shushing noises coming from the other library patrons around him. It wasn't like they could see him at the moment, and even if they could, he really didn't give a shit.
"What the hell, Ryo, I was--"
"Reading. Yeah, I know." Ryo crosses his arms over his chest and gives the other his most intimidating look. It was a lot easier when the other was sitting, giving Ryo a height advantage he didn't have otherwise. "If you read anymore your brain is going to rot-- or mine is. Come on, we're getting out of here."
"But--"
"Stop making excuses and come on."
Shige sighs but Ryo can hear him following as Ryo makes his way out of the library and into the spring air and sunshine. He takes a deep breath as he walks, Shige huffing and muttering something less than friendly under his breath. Ryo ignores him, not really caring what he has to say. If he was that against leaving his dusty little corner of the library he wouldn't have followed.
Ryo doesn't really have a destination planned, just lets his feet guide him. They lead him and a still-muttering Shige to a small park on the edge of campus, barely more than a couple of benches, a tired-looking fountain, and a ring of cherry trees. Ryo stops and takes a seat on one of the benches anyway, ignoring the way the paint is chipping off the wood beneath him and the annoyed sound that Shige makes in favor of watching the cherry blossoms ruffle slightly in the wind.
It's only a minute, maybe two, before Shige gives in and takes a seat beside him. Ryo thinks the other looks out of place almost, out here in the sunshine, away from the stacks of dusty books and huddled forms of his fellow academics. He looks younger, less serious, even with the way he's sitting straight backed against the bench and frowning at nothing in particular.
"Hey."
"What?" Shige keeps staring straight ahead, his back stiffening and the crease in his brow deepening at the sound of Ryo's voice.
"Shige."
"What?" Shige turns finally, his shoulders pushed back and chin jutting out defiantly as he scowls at Ryo.
"Lighten up."
Shige huffs but relaxes a little against the bench as he turns away. Ryo goes back to staring at the cherry blossoms, enjoying the fresh air and silence.
"So why did you drag me out here, anyway?" It takes Ryo a minute to realize that the question is directed at him. When he turns to look at Shige the other is still staring straight ahead, but his expression is uncertain, like he's not quite used to just sitting outside chatting with someone normally like this.
Ryo shrugs. "Why not? You can't tell me you like spending all of your time cooped up in the library like that."
"I have things to do--" Shige starts but cuts himself off and slumps back against the bench with a sigh. "It sucks sometimes but I have to do it if I want to stay ahead."
"So, why Law, then?"
"You'll laugh."
"It's that bad?" Ryo asks, unable to suppress a grin.
"No! It's just embarrassing."
"Embarrassing? Don't tell me you chose law because you lost a bet."
"No...." Shige start to fidget against the bench, his next words too low to hear.
"What?"
"Because of a girl, okay?" Shige blurts and Ryo could swear that the other's actually blushing.
"Seriously? You decided to study Law because of a girl?"
"Yeah. Well... sort of, anyway. Go ahead and laugh," Shige mumbles, his words more embarrassed than angry.
"So what was her name?" Ryo asks, his lack of laughter surprising even himself.
Shige blinks and turns, giving Ryo a wary look. He looks sort of like a stray dog trying to decide if he wants to go for the food being offered to him and risk being poisoned or ignore it and starve. "Kaori."
"Is she studying Law, too?"
Shige shakes his head, face still wary even as his posture gets less defensive. "No. We went to high school together. I kind of liked her--"
"Kind of?"
"Yeah, okay, I liked her a lot. And one day we were all talking about University and what we wanted to do and she said that she thought Law was really cool."
Ryo can't help but laugh at that. "So you decided to apply to one of the most competitive Law schools in the country because some girl you liked thought it was 'cool'?"
Shige starts to scowl but the expression dies as he meets Ryo's eyes and he laughs instead, looking as startled as Ryo at the sound. "... okay, it's dumb, I know."
"Just a bit."
"I like it, though. At first it was just something to do that would impress people but now-- I don't know, I actually enjoy it."
"So what changed?" Ryo asks, surprised that he's actually legitimately interested in the answer.
Shige's quiet for so long that Ryo thinks he might not answer and it catches him off guard when the other finally starts to speak. "We had to do a project in one of my classes on appeals cases. Everyone got an actual case and had to research it, write a paper about the possible grounds for appeal." He pauses, frowning slightly. "I hated the project at first, thought it was pretty useless. I never had any interest in criminal law, really."
"And a project you hated made you start loving Law?"
"No. Well, not entirely." Shige laughs again and the sound makes Ryo smile. "I hated the project, but the case itself was pretty interesting. The client was accused of hitting a pedestrian with his car and driving away from the scene. The victim died on the way to the hospital. Witnesses got a make and model of the vehicle and the first two letters of the license plate-- it seemed pretty cut and dry, but the guy kept claiming he was innocent. I thought it was just another crook trying to get out of serving his time, you know? But I did the reading like I was supposed to, reviewed all the court transcripts and notes and even talked to his lawyer. I wanted to get a good mark."
Shige turns to look at Ryo, a wry smile on his face and a fair bit of self-deprication in his voice. "I was doing it all for myself, but then I found out he was innocent."
"Innocent?"
"Yeah, actually innocent." Shige turns away to stare out into the park again. "And he's spent seven years of his life in jail for a crime he didn't commit, and he might never get out because he can't afford the lawyer fees."
"Wow."
"Yeah. It's cheesy, but it made me realize that it's not just about me. That what we do makes a difference-- that I could make a difference," Shige mumbles, a soft determination in his voice.
"That is pretty cheesy."
"Shut up," Shige says, but the words lack heat. "You know what the worst part is? Ever since then, I've been using all my free time to research the case and try to find a way to get the guy off."
"Seriously?"
"Yeah. There's a non-profit group that said they'd take on the case if I did the legwork for them."
Ryo looks at Shige then, really looks at him like he hasn't really bothered doing up to this point. He's just been assuming that Shige was another stuck up college kid who lived with his nose in a book because he wasn't capable of dealing with the real world until now, but the more he actually talks to Shige, the less that seems to be the case. "So that's why you're always in the library."
"Yeah. Lame, right?"
"No." Ryo shakes his head, smiling a little. "Not really."
It's funny, Ryo thinks, just how used to the library he gets. He doesn't mind the quiet or the dim lighting or the musty smell of books anymore. They're still not his favorite things in the world, but they don't outright irritate him anymore. Instead they just sort of fade into the background like some strange type of white noise, something he doesn't notice unless he stops and actually thinks about it.
Shige isn't as annoying, either. He's still stuck up and stubborn and a bit of an asshole at times, but if Ryo's honest with himself, he's most of those things, too. Now that Ryo knows more about him, he actually kind of respects him.
It's that respect that has him standing awkwardly in the rather posh looking office of some law professor that, judging by the number of plaques lining her wall, is probably pretty well known, even if Ryo's never heard of her. She has one of those faces that makes it hard to judge her actual age and a no-nonsense look about her that makes Ryo suspect her classes must be hell.
"Nishikido-kun. Have a seat, please." She motions to one of the plush leather seats with a curt nod of her head.
"Thanks." Ryo takes the seat and resists the urge to fidget.
"I'm sorry, but I have trouble keeping track of my students these days. You must be in International Trade Law with me this term?"
"Uh, no." Ryo winces, feeling more awkward and ineloquent than he has since he was ten. "I'm not a student."
"Oh. Are you interested in applying for next school year, then?"
"No," Ryo shakes his head, his voice apologetic. "I actually wanted to ask a few questions about a friend of mine who went here."
"Ah, I don't know if I feel comfortable giving out information about students without their permission. If you wanted to come back with a signed consent form I'd be happy to answer any questions you have."
"That might be hard, actually. He died about three months ago."
"Oh, I'm sorry," she says, and the sympathy in her voice actually seems genuine. She hesitates for a moment before she continues, her expression softening, "Your friend wouldn't happen to be Kato-kun, would it?"
Ryo manages to coax Shige out of the library and back to the park again, this time with only a few token complaints from the other.
"I have something for you," Ryo says without pretext as they both take a seat on the worn out park bench, earning him a curious look from the other.
"For me?" Shige isn't quite able to hide his curiosity as he glances over at Ryo.
Ryo reaches into his pocket and pulls out a piece of paper in answer and Shige watches as he unfolds it and spreads it out on the bench between them, staring down at it so he doesn't have to meet Shige's eyes. "I thought you might want to read this."
Shige nods dumbly, his eyes going from Ryo down to the page spread out against the peeling paint of the seat, his mouth moving slightly as he reads. It's a print out of a news article, one of the ones that you can find all over the place on the internet nowadays with the click of a few buttons (something which still baffles Ryo at times, even if Nino keeps insisting it's not that hard to learn). It would look just like any other news story if it weren't for the pictures, one of Shige smiling awkwardly in what looks like a photo from a school ID, and another of a middle aged man with a standard issue prisoner's haircut being embraced by his wife and child outside the gates of a prison. Besides the picture, the only thing that really stands out about it is the headline--Friends and Classmates of Aoyama Law Student Struggle to Finish His Work, Keep Memory Alive-- a big, bold declaration splashed across the top of the page.
Ryo can see Shige's hands trembling as he finishes and looks up at him, his eyes wide. "Is this true?"
"Yeah."
Ryo can't quite make sense of the look that Shige gives him before he looks away, his eyes focusing on the article as he reads over it again, no doubt taking it all in. Ryo sits quietly and lets him reread it, hoping that he did the right thing. Even after all these years he still wonders if he's not doing this wrong.
When Shige finally looks up again he knows that, at least this time, he hasn't made a mistake.
"So, I--," Shige starts, takes a deep breath, and stops, his face uncertain. Ryo can almost see the thoughts moving through his head and doesn't say anything to interrupt them. "I don't know what to say."
"'Thank you' works."
Shige smiles, the expression a more honest version of the one that's staring up at them from the paper between them, and laughs. "Shouldn't you be congratulating me instead?"
Ryo grins back at him and echoes his laughter. "Fine... congratulations. I guess you did a pretty good job."
"Thanks." Shige taps his finger against the article for emphasis. "For this."
Ryo just shrugs and tries not to look embarrassed. "You did the work. All I did was find the article."
"I did, didn't I?"
A few hours later Ryo leaves the park alone, a smile on his face and a piece of paper folded neatly in his pocket.