(no subject)
last night we went to a movie. she held my hand the whole time. i've never had that before. i love it when we're on her scooter and the wind blows and i get cold and i hold her closer to me. and she grasps my had when she has to stop. then we went back to her house...had some tea with milk..then cuddled and talked for a little bit. and she fell asleep on top of me like she alwyas does as i scratched her back and held her head.
haha i love how i can feel her body twitch as she's falling asleep. im such a weirdo.
and in the morning when she woke up she justkept kissing my face. especially my forehead. and nuzzled against me.
i bought this nice little card that reminds me of her...well i dedicated louis armstrong's a kiss to build a dream on to her. and i found a card that said that.
i missed her so much tonight. tonight was my last saturday night here.
i don't know how to feel about that. i've laughed so much with these girls. drea and angelface are like my sisters. i feel like i can tell them anything. its going to be weird not being around them.
you know what i realized? I dedicated this diary to pretty much whoever i'm into at the time. whoever i love, whoever i fancy. but you know who i need to dedicate it to? myself. i need to be selfish. realize my self.
but as the waves hit the water, all i could think about was her. which one? i dont know anymore. they're both there. in my system. and i cant do a damn fucking thing about it.
im going to miss haley. that's for fuckin sure. i love that girl. love her. even if she does treat me like shit. jessie did too towards the end..and i still loved her. ..i'm not sure who drug me through worse. i'm thinkin jessie. cause it cut so much deeper.
im goig to go now. but imade a promise to myself. as i was fighting the temptation not to walk into the ocean and never turn back. i promisd myself hat if the ocean didn't take me. i'm stickin around. and im making a fucking difference in this world. im going to make someone proud of me. an you know who that someone is?
myself.
erika c/s
haha i love how i can feel her body twitch as she's falling asleep. im such a weirdo.
and in the morning when she woke up she justkept kissing my face. especially my forehead. and nuzzled against me.
i bought this nice little card that reminds me of her...well i dedicated louis armstrong's a kiss to build a dream on to her. and i found a card that said that.
i missed her so much tonight. tonight was my last saturday night here.
i don't know how to feel about that. i've laughed so much with these girls. drea and angelface are like my sisters. i feel like i can tell them anything. its going to be weird not being around them.
you know what i realized? I dedicated this diary to pretty much whoever i'm into at the time. whoever i love, whoever i fancy. but you know who i need to dedicate it to? myself. i need to be selfish. realize my self.
but as the waves hit the water, all i could think about was her. which one? i dont know anymore. they're both there. in my system. and i cant do a damn fucking thing about it.
im going to miss haley. that's for fuckin sure. i love that girl. love her. even if she does treat me like shit. jessie did too towards the end..and i still loved her. ..i'm not sure who drug me through worse. i'm thinkin jessie. cause it cut so much deeper.
im goig to go now. but imade a promise to myself. as i was fighting the temptation not to walk into the ocean and never turn back. i promisd myself hat if the ocean didn't take me. i'm stickin around. and im making a fucking difference in this world. im going to make someone proud of me. an you know who that someone is?
myself.
erika c/s