Confusion block
I really don't know what's going on with my life anymore.
I'm back at home.
In a way I happy to be here. It makes some things easier, and it makes me feel safe.
But I miss having my freedom. I have a 2:00 curfew on weeknights and I have to tell my parents where I'm going.
And my mom thinks I'm on drugs because I come home at 4:00. That's just great.
As of my 19th birthday (June 28, don't forget) I will be dropped off my mom's health and life insurance. So it's either find a full time job with benefits or go to school.
I want to got to Model College of Hair Design more than anything. But I don't know how I'd deal with living in Minnesota. I don't know if things would be any different at that school than they were at GB. I don't know if I'll show up to my classes, or begin feeling like it's not worthwhile again.
I'm just really confused. Like I've stated before I wish life had a pause button.
I really need some time off of work to just sit around and think about what I really want to do with my life. Because right now my life isn't really going anywhere. Which I honestly don't mind in a way, but I feel like by doing what I'm doing I'm going to mess up everything I worked so hard for in high school. Like I'm going to disapoint my family.
I need a break from work. I'm scheduled 14 days in a row at the hotel. I worked 4 days in a row at the Pancaked Place on top of that. I'm exhausted. Physically and mentally. I had 59 rooms in one week. 7 towel rooms. 2.5 hours. and 20 some hours at the P.P.
I need a break from this.
I get the house all to myself after I work both jobs tomorrow. My mom's going to Atlanta and won't be home until after 12.
I'll get some thinking in then.
I'm back at home.
In a way I happy to be here. It makes some things easier, and it makes me feel safe.
But I miss having my freedom. I have a 2:00 curfew on weeknights and I have to tell my parents where I'm going.
And my mom thinks I'm on drugs because I come home at 4:00. That's just great.
As of my 19th birthday (June 28, don't forget) I will be dropped off my mom's health and life insurance. So it's either find a full time job with benefits or go to school.
I want to got to Model College of Hair Design more than anything. But I don't know how I'd deal with living in Minnesota. I don't know if things would be any different at that school than they were at GB. I don't know if I'll show up to my classes, or begin feeling like it's not worthwhile again.
I'm just really confused. Like I've stated before I wish life had a pause button.
I really need some time off of work to just sit around and think about what I really want to do with my life. Because right now my life isn't really going anywhere. Which I honestly don't mind in a way, but I feel like by doing what I'm doing I'm going to mess up everything I worked so hard for in high school. Like I'm going to disapoint my family.
I need a break from work. I'm scheduled 14 days in a row at the hotel. I worked 4 days in a row at the Pancaked Place on top of that. I'm exhausted. Physically and mentally. I had 59 rooms in one week. 7 towel rooms. 2.5 hours. and 20 some hours at the P.P.
I need a break from this.
I get the house all to myself after I work both jobs tomorrow. My mom's going to Atlanta and won't be home until after 12.
I'll get some thinking in then.