(no subject)
27/02/07
An AWFUL day. For basic and abbreviated evidence of this, please, feel free to click on the link below. However, those of a cynical disposition may look away now, as blood pressure may shoot through the roof…
9.26am - I am horrified to read this in the paper: “NORWAY - An artwork that had £8,000 of bank notes pasted on it has been stolen from a gallery in Oslo. ‘Relative Value’ by Jan Christensen became famous because the artist used his own cash. Thieves smashed a window and made off with the canvas on Sunday. Mr Christensen said ‘We were afraid of something like this.’” Concrete proof once again, that I am alone with my logic. People are stupid, it’s simple.
9.57am - I eat my lunch. I am truly a fat man.
10.38am - The first of several horrific pieces of dialogue that I have had to endure:
Me: ...that’s £127.68 please.
Customer: …No, it’s not.
Me: No it really is, that’s what these two bills add up to.
Customer: They don’t, they add up to £113.58.
Me: With all due respect madam, that’s just not true.
Customer: It is, I added it up on this piece of paper.
Me: Again, with all due respect, I used a computer. It thinks 4000 times a second.
Customer: Are you saying I’m wrong?
Me: That’s exactly what I’m saying. You are fundamentally and deeply wrong.
Customer: I’m just going to phone my husband and see what he makes of this.
…it’s at this point I realise that the 2 inches of bullet proof glass between me and the customer is positioned for their benefit, and not mine.
11.20am - The newborn baby of a colleague is brought into the office for a showing off session. A customer hears the baby cry:
Customer: Oh, is that a baby I hear?
Me: Yes, it’s the new born of one of our colleagues.
Customer: Oh, there’s a lot of them about these days isn’t there?
…WHAT?! PEOPLE?!...I have since prayed to the Lord above that she wasn’t trying to find a way to moan about the existence of the human race.
…and that was just the morning. It’s futile and needless to detail my afternoon. Just trust me when I say that I was glad to leave.
In other news, spoke to Joe, and hopefully he shall be free this weekend so I can go visit. A small measure of normality would be a welcome trip.
P.S - I think I will move to Leeds Vee, can I sleep on your sofa and not get a job? x
X
Mood: Desperation.
Music: Pull Tiger Tail, Sunshine Underground.
An AWFUL day. For basic and abbreviated evidence of this, please, feel free to click on the link below. However, those of a cynical disposition may look away now, as blood pressure may shoot through the roof…
9.26am - I am horrified to read this in the paper: “NORWAY - An artwork that had £8,000 of bank notes pasted on it has been stolen from a gallery in Oslo. ‘Relative Value’ by Jan Christensen became famous because the artist used his own cash. Thieves smashed a window and made off with the canvas on Sunday. Mr Christensen said ‘We were afraid of something like this.’” Concrete proof once again, that I am alone with my logic. People are stupid, it’s simple.
9.57am - I eat my lunch. I am truly a fat man.
10.38am - The first of several horrific pieces of dialogue that I have had to endure:
Me: ...that’s £127.68 please.
Customer: …No, it’s not.
Me: No it really is, that’s what these two bills add up to.
Customer: They don’t, they add up to £113.58.
Me: With all due respect madam, that’s just not true.
Customer: It is, I added it up on this piece of paper.
Me: Again, with all due respect, I used a computer. It thinks 4000 times a second.
Customer: Are you saying I’m wrong?
Me: That’s exactly what I’m saying. You are fundamentally and deeply wrong.
Customer: I’m just going to phone my husband and see what he makes of this.
…it’s at this point I realise that the 2 inches of bullet proof glass between me and the customer is positioned for their benefit, and not mine.
11.20am - The newborn baby of a colleague is brought into the office for a showing off session. A customer hears the baby cry:
Customer: Oh, is that a baby I hear?
Me: Yes, it’s the new born of one of our colleagues.
Customer: Oh, there’s a lot of them about these days isn’t there?
…WHAT?! PEOPLE?!...I have since prayed to the Lord above that she wasn’t trying to find a way to moan about the existence of the human race.
…and that was just the morning. It’s futile and needless to detail my afternoon. Just trust me when I say that I was glad to leave.
In other news, spoke to Joe, and hopefully he shall be free this weekend so I can go visit. A small measure of normality would be a welcome trip.
P.S - I think I will move to Leeds Vee, can I sleep on your sofa and not get a job? x
X
Mood: Desperation.
Music: Pull Tiger Tail, Sunshine Underground.