WOW
You know whats really sad? thinking about what it is to be happy, and realizing you really never have been... I wish i knew why there is so much tension in my head, or what this weird sick feeling is in my chest is. As much as i have thought about it, i still have not been able to identify a cause or solution. Its odd to think that i could become so aware with the meeting of one person. Unfortunatly, the only things i have become aware of are how dismal this world is, and the utter pointlessness of life. The phenomina of human interaction no longer makes any sense to me, other than that it is neccisary for the endurance of sanity. I can't even really enjoy listening to music anymore because it feels so much like the same old thing. I wonder what it would be like to not have the burden of thought. To exist entirely on instinct and reflex. To have no concept of love or hate, Just survival. I think i could be happy if i couldnt think. Or maybe not, who knows?