Nervous

[nevermissbhaven]

So...I am very nervous about sharing this on live journal, because it is not really something that I have shared before in it's entirety. I am afraid of being the "kid with the messed up childhood." But, on the other hand, it feels good to finally get this out and I feel like it helps a bit with the continual healing process. I know that it's a lot

Comments

my love for my brave britty

[anonymous]

Britty the divorce was the worst time in my life. I just could not visual a divorce between your father and I.we had made so many plans, I did not understand what was going on this was my life unravlling before us.Britty I worried so about you ,you where so hurt.I was devasted I knew we where having a rough time but never in a million years dream divorce.It was like a piece of the puzzle missing and Icould not find the missing piece.Idid find the lost piece It was Mary nothing has ever hurt me so deeply in my life. I really came unraveled,Icould not sleep, eat, think ,read ,move ,I was just sinking deeper into depression belive me bab I tried so hard not to let that happen.I had all was been strong at most everything.but 25 year of being in love and had our life planed,the new home we work on for months every weekend baby I can possible put in to words what was happing to me. I gusse I went a little nuts ooo. Baby the worst think I hated the most was what this doing to you. I tryed to hold my head up It just would not stay up the tears where endless.I am really sorry for daying bobby to soon. I needed to talk to some one and he hah a lot of the answers this hah been going for guit a long time,ijust wish he would have sit down and told me Not find out the way i did. sorrybabyfor mistakes I made.Ijust lost it never mean to hurt you or johnny.so so sorry but I have to tell you it was just to much to take I didnt belive that could happen to me I considered myself strong but apeason can only take so much hurt. but you know the good part about it bab It is making me a much stronger personand am back in my faith with our Father GOD trough Jesus name. In a new church I am ejoying and God has may thing he needs me to do in this church.do not know them al yet but he will rvell them to me I think one may be working with children in some way and I think i may go on a misson trip that would be cool. ALso Iam on the committe to word with the new building decorating. life is good and life is god. And I hope mary an your dad will be happy and the boys are happy love much and more my baby girl lov mother