whatever
Yeah well i think this Post
will be really long...im not sure yeah so lately things have been CRAZY
i dont know what to do...i mean i miss some people like you wont even
guess...its really sad to think that i may never get to see some of
these people that seriously and honest to god i love and care about
from the bottom of my heart...i never really knew you could feel this
way about some people that you just met and then become friends with
like so fast...i really do miss you guys...you arent all about drama
and fights and you really dont care about stupid stuff like that and
also i mean there are these days when i just want to get on a plane and
not even care where im going but just get outta here and go some where
else maybe even for good...i dont know if i would ever really be able
to do that alone or even leave for good. i dont know what im talking
about right now but i was just talking to will and we both go through
the same stuff when we get backk..i mean i have lost a best friend lost
all feeling inside and dont know what to do about the guy problem...i
want to just go somewhere where there is no freaking drama...you really
have no idea what its like to be me..and im not even talking about my
life being horriable and i know that there are people out there that
have nothing or their lives really do suck and thats not what im
saying. i really dont know anyone cole i can really trust anymore. i
know you all that are reading this really dont care about me and i dont
even care if you care or not im talking about things that really are
personal to me and i dont know what to share with who anymore.i would
share it with anyone i met on my cruise and thats only becuase i love
them and i trust them but i know i cant always go and run and cry on
there shoulders. i know that they wouldnt care really but at the same
time its like i know i will always have them with me and always know
that they do care about me...holy hell i mean their there for me more
now then some of my friends from home have EVER been there for me. i
know that a lot of people from home and school that are reading this
are gonna think that i really hate them or i never trusted them but im
saying thanks to colton that i relize i really dont have anyone to go
to here..i know that if i was to get on an air plane and fly to
maryland or new york or where ever then i know that they wouldnt care
but i know i have people that i can stay with and they will talk to me
and help me though all the stuff i get put though i mean things at home
are getting better but they will never be the same again not after all
the hell i have put my whole family though. i know i have hurt them and
made them worry i know that they dont deserve any of the stuff i put
them though. i know i screw up all the time and i use the excuse that
everyone makes mistakes some times and its ok but really i have used
that one to much and it doesnt come true anymore...i just wish i could
get away from the people that i cant trust and i cant even call a
friend. i dont know what the point of typing this was. i just really
dont know what to do anymore..i miss you guys from the cruise and i
want to see you all together again.i dont care what i have to do..i
will see you all again.i love you guys so much!!! but im going to go
now and prolly sleep or listen to music like i alwayss do..have fun...i
love you ...
-Sam
-Sam