cross my heart and hope to die; stick every needle in my eye; if it would bring me back to you.
so new years was eventful.
britney was drunk like wow.
dustin was pissed becasue he though i drank and he didnt want me to drive.
i was perfectly fine. no alcohal for me.
but dustin was drunk off his ass and didnt understand.
so him and britney got into an argument for like an hour. it was hilarious two drunk people fighting about being drunk.
so we left and dustin yelled " have fun getting a D.U.I" he didnt understand i didnt drink.
what a whore.
its all good.
sooo hmm left the party around 3. went to i-hop.
ate so much. best food ever! ok not really but mmmm
matt told me he loved me. idk if that was the alcohaul talking. but it raises the question. do i love him back? YES. he makes mehappy again for the first time since well. yea. those days are in my past i still love him i always will. but i think ive finally moved on. i love that feeling. i mean yea its still there hell always be in my heart./ i truly loved him. i loved him unconditionaly. i screwed up, ill admit it. biggest regret of my life. but ive learned from it. the most painful learning ive ever had to do but i did it. all i can do now is take a jump of faith and hope matt catches me. im tired of holding back becasue i think think old flames could posibly be rekindled i think its pretty obvious they cant. no matter now much i want them to. ive decided to let go of that. its hard yea as i go back and read this i look back on everything. he was my best friend. the only person i could talk to about everything. the only person i TRULY cared about. i could stay up for hours just talking to him about who knows what. i cant count the letters i wrote and threw away casue i couldnt get the nerve up to send them about how i felt about him, how i missed him, how i wish i could go back... you kno all that stuff. but thats in my past now. ill never forget about it. but its in the past. i realize the same thing could happen with matt. as i told micheal, i kno this will probably end in tears, mine or his, most likly mine but thats a chance im willing to take.
everything is blue. just like my life. haha not really.
i can see you
britney is drunk in this picture... haha
wet hair is HOT. ok maybe not. lol
matt! :]
lawrence playing the ukalalee *or however you spell it*
matt's car. i love it.
matt again.
matt in this pirate hat...lol
