[Somewhat shaky video turns on, the camera pointing mostly at the Master's face. He is smirking as he walks, holding his Network Device. He clearly finds something very amusing.]
Hullo, City! Now, I haven't been taking the curses very seriously but I've been assured that this is generally a hellish month. Due, I suspect, mainly to the allure of
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I...oww...my head...
[extreme sarcasm]
I'm not actually sure just at the moment.
I'll get right back to you once I can see anything.
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Mmgh, well, I'm tied up at the moment.
[humourless laughter]
I mean literally. Literally tied up. But I...yes, I'm pretty sure I still have my eyes. And...no blindfold that I can feel so...it's very dark. Staggeringly dark. As in there is absolutely no light in this room or wherever I am. Clearly, I still have my Network Device, as I'm talking to you. But the screen's off, or something similar.
I can't see a thing.
[pause, then he speaks dryly]
I suppose this is meant to teach me not to laugh at the deities?
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Just stay calm. I'm sure someone'll be by to help you, or I can--you were in the pumpkin patch? Spooky dark places can't be that hard to find.
...Not laughing would be a good idea, yeah.
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I'll stop laughing when they stop being funny.
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[pause]
--sorry, I thought I heard something. I'm perhaps a wee bit paranoid over on this end but rightfully so. Anyway, once I have my hands out in front of me I can feel around for my Device, turn on the light of the screen again and find out where I am. It's all really quite simple, if I--
[A dull thud. Silence.]
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[Pause. Long pause. Longer pause.]
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[pause]
Things have become a little more interesting.
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[pause]
All right, fine, I agree with you, enough is enough. I think I heard someone on the Network volunteering to scour the pumpkin patch for survivors. I'll ask her to maybe try and pop by. [sigh, spoken a little bit stiffly, not nearly as charming as usual] Thank you for your help and advice.
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[said just as cheerfully as usual, thank you] You're welcome!
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