Here's another fic I found lying around on my hard drive :p
Title: The Only Way
Fandom: Grimm
Pairing: Nick/Renard
Rating: PG-13
Summary: The only way to rid one's self of temptation is to give in to it... (Set in Season 2 before Adalind's spell is broken. AU.)
There are a thousand different reasons not to act on the burning want that itches beneath his skin... And that this is largely a product of that bitch Adalind's magic is only one of them.
Sean needs Nick on his side. There are a thousand different ways that this curse could jeopardize their relationship, and Sean is as aware of this - each and every time he comes into contact with the object of his obsession - as he is powerless to stop the craving.
"Captain... I love Juliette..."
Sean's leashing in his emotions, barely, and Nick looks as though he's doing the same... Body tense and jaw clenched, rigid; hands balled into fists at his sides. Nick's eyes are bright and sharp and full of so much-
'Best not to look at his eyes,' Sean thinks, feeling speared by remorse and guilt and jealousy. "I know that," he says. "Believe me, Nick... I know."
"Then just stop!"
"I would if it were only that simple!" The words are out of his mouth before Sean can stop them... A shout rather than the calm, rational tone he's meant to maintain. There's nothing calm or rational - or simple, for that matter - about any of this. "Don't you think I- Don't you think I've tried to reign in this... this hunger?"
Nick looks away from him.
"I've tried everything not to do this to you..." Sean can hear Nick breathing across the short distance of his office, which they've put between themselves like a buffer. As if any physical barrier can hold against the spell - much less an imaginary one. "Not to make you choose..."
Sean hears Nick's almost inaudible gasp... and god help him but it makes his pulse leap. It makes him dream. To be able to pull that ragged breathing, a quiet gasp, from a place of pleasure rather than torment-
But Sean's lying, of course. He hasn't tried everything. He hasn't drug Nick to the Wessen apothecary, because once he does all of his secrets will be out. Out and perhaps just as damaging as what Sean wants to do to Nick right now. To close the distance between them and to reach for and to claim Nick. It's killing Sean not to do it, and he isn't exaggerating... He knows Hexenbeist magic. It is literally killing them not to give in to this.
"You have to try harder." Nick's voice is just a breath.
It would sting, Nick's rejection of him so matter-of-fact... no matter that Sean knows not to expect more from Nick than the spell was meant to give him. (If Sean feels more... has felt more, for some time now... that is his problem and only his problem.) Except that Nick's eyes are closed as he speaks. His words are so unlike him, so weak and uncertain. He's holding himself so still...
"Can you?" Sean should have said nothing. Nick is standing between him and the door, so he can't walk away, but Sean could order Nick out of his office. He could try to hold on for one more day... To survive one more brush with temptation-
But instead he finds himself having asked that question... Seeing Nick glance back at him sharply. Seeing the need and the despair - mirrors to his own - so plain on Nick's face...
Nick's voice is stronger this time, but wrecked, as he says, "God, I don't think so..."
And it's all that Sean can take.
In long strides, Sean finds himself at Nick's side, hands hovering near Nick's face like that damned barrier is physical.
'It is, damn it... It is,' Sean tells himself, fingers curling. He cannot save himself from his doomed infatuation with his grimm. He's too much of a coward to save Nick from Adalind's spell. But at the very least he will have Nick's consent before he pushes the both of them towards succumbing to it. In as much as a man can consent while under a Hexenbeist's magic...
"Captain-"
"Sean... Call me Sean..."
They're so close... to touching, to kissing. He's breathing Nick's breath; their eyes are on only each other.
Nick's lashes flutter. "Sean..."
Sean feels the utterance of his name, by Nick's tongue, up and down his spine he has waited so long to hear it uttered like this. Nick says, "I can't..." but the words fade away, and he says it like he's saying, "I give..."
So that's what Sean chooses to hear. He takes Nick's face in his hands and he crashes their mouths together. After so much build up, the simple slide of lips is not enough - he has to feel the bones in Nick's jaw beneath his fingertips, he has to feel the hard press of teeth. He has to taste skin...
He has to open his mouth as Nick licks into it with a groan that sets Sean's nerves on fire.
"Son of a bitch..." Nick breathes into their kiss, and Sean doesn't know if Nick is cursing him or just cursing in general, but it doesn't matter.
Adalind's won. Whatever she hopes to gain by this... She's won. This is almost certain to end badly. But with Nick pressed against him, the sounds of their coming together - clothing rustling, buttons popping, zippers rending; pants and sighs and moans - drowning out the voices of caution in his head...
Quite frankly... Sean can't be bothered to give a damn.
[end.]