Fic: What a Lovely Way... (Chuck, Chuck/Bryce, PG13, MPREG)
Title: What a Lovely Way...
Fandom: Chuck
Pairing: Chuck/Bryce
Rating: PG13
Word Count:
Warning(s): Crackety crack crack mpreg :p And all that comes with it.
Summary: An undercover op goes sideways, leaving Chuck pregnant, Bryce in the wind, and their relationship - or lack thereof - up in the air.
Author's Note: For this prompt at chuck_anonkink.
AO3
He knows that it’s a hormonal thing. If there’s one thing Chuck’s learned since this whole incredible, impossible pregnancy began, it’s the power of hormones. Chuck can be on top of the world one day, ready to take on parenthood… single-parenthood… single-parent-slash-spy-hood all together. He can have his head held high and his wit ready to strike down anyone who might slight his unborn child or the manner of his or her conception…
And the next day he’ll be sobbing into his new hypoallergenic pillows (Devon and Ellie have taken baby-proofing and germ-proofing his place to a whole new level) and wondering what he was thinking when he didn’t let General Beckman authorize “treatment” for his “condition”.
Chuck will curse the shady fertility clinic he and Bryce infiltrated posing as hopeful clients, then apologize profusely to the bulge beneath his t-shirt for wishing away the “happy accident” that resulted.
Chuck’s moods shift this way, in fact, three times a week, so he knows better than to swear by the powerful emotions surging through him as he and Morgan and Sarah wait in the special examination room the General had constructed in Castle and Devon and Ellie confer with the doctor out in the corridor.
Casey is… around. Somewhere. The General tied talking Chuck out of keeping his baby; Sarah stood neutral on the subject, wary but supportive. Morgan was thrilled, and Devon and Ellie were fascinated but concerned.
But Casey didn’t say a word about any of it before Chuck finally started to show. Chuck had more or less gotten the impression that Casey was so disgusted by the situation, by Chuck’s decision and by the no-doubt-obvious motivations behind that decision, that he couldn’t stand having a conversation with Chuck about it.
But when Casey overheard Sarah fussing at Chuck for forgetting to take his prenatals, he grabbed Chuck by the scruff of his neck, dragged him into one of Castle’s interrogation rooms, and gave him a talking-to that shattered all of Chuck’s apparently ill-conceived notions. “Chuck, you’re one of the best spies I’ve ever worked with. And you’re- You’re a friend,” Casey mumbled, to Chuck’s growing surprise. “And if we have to bury you because you got yourself so hung up on Larkin you’d risk your life to have his kid, I will follow you wherever stupid spies go when they die and kick your ass for the rest of eternity.”
The gist of their discussion was: take your pills. Oh, and also get more bedrest. Chuck’s pretty sure no other pregnant person has gotten that advice from an armed assassin growling in their face.
‘Hormones, hormones, hormones…,’ Chuck tells himself, while Sarah squeezes his hand. But he can’t hold back the words regardless. “I wish Bryce were here,” Chuck says aloud. He doesn’t lift his eyes from the pattern on his hospital gown because he knows what expression he’ll see on both Sarah’s and Morgan’s face.
“I mean,” Chuck babbles, forcing a pretty pitiful-sounding laugh. “That’s supposed to be a part of the process, right? I’m supposed to curse the baby’s father for ‘doing this to me’ and, you know, like, chew ice chips or something.”
But when he does look up, Chuck doesn’t see pity in either of his friends’ expressions. Morgan looks pale and uncharacteristically serious; Sarah looks about as shaken as Chuck feels. “We- I can get you some ice chips, if you want,” Sarah says, glossing over the other half of Chuck’s words. She obviously doesn’t know what to say about Bryce… So she doesn’t. No one does. They’ve been avoiding the ‘B-word’ around Chuck since Bryce left Burbank like the General mandated a silent order on the subject (which, now that Chuck thinks about it, doesn’t sound so far-fetched.) “You just can’t eat or drink anything before the ex- Before the surgery.”
And-
And Chuck appreciates the sentiment. He really does. He only made the ‘baby’s father’ crack in a lame attempt to lighten the mood, but now that it’s been spoken, Chuck finds himself expanding on the idea, much to his own horror. “Not that the baby has a “father” in the traditional sense of the word… Bryce didn’t actually do anything. This… this has nothing to do with him, really.”
Chuck can’t make himself stop either. Sarah gets this deer-in-the-headlights look; Chuck can see Morgan swallow and look away. He holds the hand that Sarah isn’t holding in one of his (but he and Chuck promised each other that they would never speak of it.) “So that was a stupid thing to say, I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I-”
Chuck realizes that he’s been squeezing the bejeezus out of Sarah’s and Morgan’s hand, and he tries to let go, but they each hold tight, even as Morgan stutters in his haste to negate everything Chuck’s just said.
“Of course your baby has a father!” He says, leaning forward, intent. “He - or she - has the best father and mother and- and everything a baby could have! Charles Bartowski, don’t you dare say it’s stupid to want to share that with someone that you care about.”
Chuck breathes. Willing his eyes to obey as his mouth could not. ‘Don’t cry! Don’t cr- Damn it!’
“If I was Bryce, I would feel honored to be the parent of a brand new little Bartowski,” Morgan continues thickly. And Sarah shocks Chuck silly when she nods. “And no matter if Bryce does or doesn’t come around, we will be right here with you, all the way.” Morgan gestures between himself and Sarah with his free hand.
“And so will Ellie and Awesome and John,” Sarah adds. “And Alex… and I think even the General’s warming up to the idea of there being a little Chuck running around in the world.”
Chuck has to huff out a laugh - a real one this time - at that. ‘I seriously doubt it,’ he thinks. “We are not letting the CIA build a second substation beneath my baby’s daycare,” Chuck says, playing along.
“Buddy, we will do anything we have to do to help you through this.” And though Chuck’s latest emotional breakdown - hormone-induced or otherwise - seems to have been averted, Morgan keeps talking to keep Chuck smiling. “In fact, if it would make you feel better to curse at someone as a part of your “process”… curse at me! I can take it.”
Chuckling, Chuck lets Sarah and Morgan go, so he can wipe his eyes, and now they let him. “You really couldn’t,” he says, at the same time that Sarah says, “I don’t think so.”
Morgan’s is a watery grin. But his voice is light as he admits, “I really couldn’t. You know me, Chuck. A harsh word from you and I’m mush.”
It’s not the best time for Bryce to show up in the doorway, a step or two behind Casey - while Chuck is scrubbing at his face like a child. ‘At least he didn’t show while I was bawling like a baby.’ Chuck clings to the thought as the room falls silent and everyone stares at one another for a long moment.
“I-” Bryce starts and stops. So unlike his usual smooth-spoken self.
Casey grunts impolitely. “I’m not gonna do your talking for you, too, Larkin, so get your shit together. Walker.” And Casey looks to Sarah and nods at the door, with a glare for Morgan that presumably means the same thing.
“Chuck, you-“
“I’m fine, buddy. You go ahead.” Chuck tells Morgan, noticing the dirty looks and gestures that Morgan is throwing at Bryce but too flustered to ask Morgan to behave.
Bryce hasn’t looked at anyone but Chuck since entering the room.
In seconds, he and Chuck are alone together.
Another thing Chuck’s learned since becoming pregnant? Is that you shouldn’t put off doing anything that needs to be done. (That’s a pretty easy lesson to learn when your belly’s gotten too big for you to double back and take care of something that you’ve forgotten.)
Bryce says, “Chuck, I’m sorry…”
And, at the same time, Chuck says the same basic thing.
Bryce frowns, but otherwise his face is inscrutable. Still, Chuck thinks he detects surprise before Bryce can recover and get his expressions back under complete control.
“Chuck, why are you apologizing to me?”
Chuck would have thought that it was obvious. “For Morgan. And probably Casey,” he says. “They don’t really understand… any of this.” And who could blame them? It’s not every day that their male friend and/or spy partner goes into labor.
But it is sort of starting to freak Chuck out, how intently Bryce is looking at him. Chuck keeps resisting the urge to look down at himself and see what Bryce is staring at, because of course Chuck knows. It’s been months since Bryce has seen Chuck’s stomach, and the sight of it is still startling even to Chuck, who gets to see it every day.
Chuck’s face burns and he picks at his army issue bedcovers. The worst time for Bryce to see Chuck is now - when Chuck looks like he’s swallowed a basketball. Bryce, the guy Chuck has been hopelessly pining for since pretty much the 90’s, and Chuck, the guy wanting miserably to hide. Nothing makes wanting to hide more miserable than the certainty that you can’t.
“Do you?” Bryce asks.
Chuck breathes deeply.
The best answer would be ‘yes.’
Chuck meant what he told Morgan and Sarah. Bryce didn’t technically do anything to owe Chuck the apology he’s nonetheless given Chuck just now. Neither of them knew, when Bryce gave the clinic his ‘sample’ and Chuck registered ‘Mr. Charlie Charles’ for the clinic's revolutionary procedure, that a freaky series of events would end in Chuck actually being operated on and successfully implanted with an artifical womb. Complete with a viable embryo. Bryce didn’t ask to be the father of Chuck’s baby. In fact, he told Chuck flat out that Chuck should get rid of it when Chuck realized that the procedure had actually taken.
So Chuck probably shouldn't have been surprised when he and Bryce had a big fight about Chuck's decision to carry the "embryo" to term instead. Bryce obviously hates the thought of his first (and maybe only? Bryce's never talked about wanting kids) child being born this way. To someone Bryce has no romantic feelings - or, as far as Chuck knows, any feelings whatsoever - towards. Chuck "understands" that Bryce taking off after their fight - on a temporary reassignment the General said Bryce had requested - wasn't Bryce abandoning Chuck. He and Chuck aren't the couple they went into that clinic pretending to be. They're barely even friends at this point. They were just beginning to reclaim that easy companionship they'd shared in college when Chuck made this decision that, apparently, Bryce can't tolerate having been made.
Chuck’s just not sure his heart can understand it.
“Bryce… I get it. I do,” Chuck settles on saying. “You're not cool with this. And I'm sorry that I had to go against your wishes to keep the baby."
An emotion flickers across Bryce’s face again, though this time Chuck can’t say which one. “Chuck…”
“Let me finish. And you are under absolutely no obligation... to do anything, to have any sort of contact with- No one even has to know that the baby is yours! Not even him... or her."
Another flicker. "You don't know which?"
"I- I wanted to be surprised." Chuck tries not to wonder if that makes him even more strange in Bryce's eyes... More pathetic, even perverse. Not only did Chuck choose to go through with this pregnancy, but he actually found himself reveling in certain parts of it. Picking out baby names with his family and friends; readying a nursery. Deciding not to find out the sex of the baby ahead of time. Chuck remembers, somewhat sheepish under Bryce's searching gaze, the first time he felt the baby kick and realized what was happening. He burst into Devon and Ellie's in the middle of the night, almost giving the both of them a heart attack. And then he would have felt embarrassed for it, except that the baby had stopped kicking by then and Ellie was determined to make it start again. She kept Chuck up for hours, poking him in the sides while Devon used a stethoscope to listen to Chuck's stomach, approximating the baby's location so Ellie could wake him or her up.
And speaking of which... The baby is obviously awake now. Chuck's mostly ignored the fluttery movements, but when he receives a particularly sharp kick at the very center of his stomach, Chuck lays a hand over that spot without thinking.
Bryce's eyes immediately catch the gesture. And he shocks Chuck to the core by asking, "Can I-"
He gestures, and it's obvious what he's requesting.
Almost dazed, Chuck nods and moves his hand. Bryce lays his own down in the same spot, his eyes glued to the mound beneath his touch like he expects to see a tiny foot when he feels it.
It's Chuck's turn to stare at Bryce now and he swallows, seeing... something struggling to show itself on Bryce's face once and for all. He forces the rest of what he has to say out before he loses his nerve. Before Bryce can speak his turn and crush Chuck's hopes, however far-fetched, completely.
"I just couldn't kill it, Bryce," Chuck chokes out, snapping Bryce's gaze back to himself. "I couldn't let it go. It- He or she... is a baby. Our baby. It's not what either of us wanted or, obviously, expected, but that's not the baby's fault!" Chuck can feel himself getting worked up over this, but he goes on. "You can be angry, if you want. I don't blame you for how you feel. You don't have to- to claim the baby or anything, but, man. I wish you wouldn't have left. I wish you'd come back. I love-" Chuck barely stops himself from revealing one truth by revealing another. "I love this baby. And I wish you wouldn't hate me for that."
The mask of indifference on Bryce's face finally crumbles. And what remains pierces Chuck, looking at it, because Chuck mistakes the fury in Bryce's expression for being directed at himself. At the same time, Chuck feels something odd right where the baby had kicked him. It's Bryce's hand Chuck is feeling, not the baby. Bryce's hand is shaking.
And Bryce's other hand is reaching for Chuck's throat. No, for Chuck's face. Bryce cups one side of Chuck's face in his palm and kisses Chuck before Chuck can form an intelligent thought about this turn of events.
"I could never- I don't hate you, Chuck. I don't hate the baby," Bryce says against Chuck's lips. And then he pulls back far enough that Chuck sees the wet sheen of his eyes. "I don't want you to pretend that this had nothing to do with me. I want you to have this baby."
Chuck reels with the information.
Bryce continues, "I just wanted to keep you safe more. Chuck, you know how dangerous the operation you're about to have can be."
Chuck knows all the statistics. "I think it's worth the risk."
"I think," Bryce says, looking completely serious, "I couldn't live with myself if you died because of me."
This is all a bit much for Chuck's hormone-addled brain. Besides the fact that Bryce makes two people since Chuck became pregnant to naturally assume that Chuck is going to die on the operating table, Chuck's just been given a solid reason to believe that he's about to have a dream come true.
"You know this isn't your fault, Bryce. What are you saying?"
Bryce doesn't keep him waiting. With a second, shorter, kiss to Chuck's lips, Bryce looks Chuck in the eyes and says, "I'm saying that I love you, Chuck. And if it hadn't sort of terrified me to figure that out, I would have been around to say it to you these last six months. I'm sorry that I wasn't."
Chuck thinks he would be well within his rights to bawl again, right about now - even without pregnancy hormones. But he's far too happy to take advantage, and there are better things he could do with his time before the operation.
Chuck takes Bryce's face in his hands and smiles. "You're here now." And with several hours' time to prove his words true before their son - or daughter - is born.
Bryce makes the most of them.
[end.]
Fandom: Chuck
Pairing: Chuck/Bryce
Rating: PG13
Word Count:
Warning(s): Crackety crack crack mpreg :p And all that comes with it.
Summary: An undercover op goes sideways, leaving Chuck pregnant, Bryce in the wind, and their relationship - or lack thereof - up in the air.
Author's Note: For this prompt at chuck_anonkink.
AO3
He knows that it’s a hormonal thing. If there’s one thing Chuck’s learned since this whole incredible, impossible pregnancy began, it’s the power of hormones. Chuck can be on top of the world one day, ready to take on parenthood… single-parenthood… single-parent-slash-spy-hood all together. He can have his head held high and his wit ready to strike down anyone who might slight his unborn child or the manner of his or her conception…
And the next day he’ll be sobbing into his new hypoallergenic pillows (Devon and Ellie have taken baby-proofing and germ-proofing his place to a whole new level) and wondering what he was thinking when he didn’t let General Beckman authorize “treatment” for his “condition”.
Chuck will curse the shady fertility clinic he and Bryce infiltrated posing as hopeful clients, then apologize profusely to the bulge beneath his t-shirt for wishing away the “happy accident” that resulted.
Chuck’s moods shift this way, in fact, three times a week, so he knows better than to swear by the powerful emotions surging through him as he and Morgan and Sarah wait in the special examination room the General had constructed in Castle and Devon and Ellie confer with the doctor out in the corridor.
Casey is… around. Somewhere. The General tied talking Chuck out of keeping his baby; Sarah stood neutral on the subject, wary but supportive. Morgan was thrilled, and Devon and Ellie were fascinated but concerned.
But Casey didn’t say a word about any of it before Chuck finally started to show. Chuck had more or less gotten the impression that Casey was so disgusted by the situation, by Chuck’s decision and by the no-doubt-obvious motivations behind that decision, that he couldn’t stand having a conversation with Chuck about it.
But when Casey overheard Sarah fussing at Chuck for forgetting to take his prenatals, he grabbed Chuck by the scruff of his neck, dragged him into one of Castle’s interrogation rooms, and gave him a talking-to that shattered all of Chuck’s apparently ill-conceived notions. “Chuck, you’re one of the best spies I’ve ever worked with. And you’re- You’re a friend,” Casey mumbled, to Chuck’s growing surprise. “And if we have to bury you because you got yourself so hung up on Larkin you’d risk your life to have his kid, I will follow you wherever stupid spies go when they die and kick your ass for the rest of eternity.”
The gist of their discussion was: take your pills. Oh, and also get more bedrest. Chuck’s pretty sure no other pregnant person has gotten that advice from an armed assassin growling in their face.
‘Hormones, hormones, hormones…,’ Chuck tells himself, while Sarah squeezes his hand. But he can’t hold back the words regardless. “I wish Bryce were here,” Chuck says aloud. He doesn’t lift his eyes from the pattern on his hospital gown because he knows what expression he’ll see on both Sarah’s and Morgan’s face.
“I mean,” Chuck babbles, forcing a pretty pitiful-sounding laugh. “That’s supposed to be a part of the process, right? I’m supposed to curse the baby’s father for ‘doing this to me’ and, you know, like, chew ice chips or something.”
But when he does look up, Chuck doesn’t see pity in either of his friends’ expressions. Morgan looks pale and uncharacteristically serious; Sarah looks about as shaken as Chuck feels. “We- I can get you some ice chips, if you want,” Sarah says, glossing over the other half of Chuck’s words. She obviously doesn’t know what to say about Bryce… So she doesn’t. No one does. They’ve been avoiding the ‘B-word’ around Chuck since Bryce left Burbank like the General mandated a silent order on the subject (which, now that Chuck thinks about it, doesn’t sound so far-fetched.) “You just can’t eat or drink anything before the ex- Before the surgery.”
And-
And Chuck appreciates the sentiment. He really does. He only made the ‘baby’s father’ crack in a lame attempt to lighten the mood, but now that it’s been spoken, Chuck finds himself expanding on the idea, much to his own horror. “Not that the baby has a “father” in the traditional sense of the word… Bryce didn’t actually do anything. This… this has nothing to do with him, really.”
Chuck can’t make himself stop either. Sarah gets this deer-in-the-headlights look; Chuck can see Morgan swallow and look away. He holds the hand that Sarah isn’t holding in one of his (but he and Chuck promised each other that they would never speak of it.) “So that was a stupid thing to say, I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I-”
Chuck realizes that he’s been squeezing the bejeezus out of Sarah’s and Morgan’s hand, and he tries to let go, but they each hold tight, even as Morgan stutters in his haste to negate everything Chuck’s just said.
“Of course your baby has a father!” He says, leaning forward, intent. “He - or she - has the best father and mother and- and everything a baby could have! Charles Bartowski, don’t you dare say it’s stupid to want to share that with someone that you care about.”
Chuck breathes. Willing his eyes to obey as his mouth could not. ‘Don’t cry! Don’t cr- Damn it!’
“If I was Bryce, I would feel honored to be the parent of a brand new little Bartowski,” Morgan continues thickly. And Sarah shocks Chuck silly when she nods. “And no matter if Bryce does or doesn’t come around, we will be right here with you, all the way.” Morgan gestures between himself and Sarah with his free hand.
“And so will Ellie and Awesome and John,” Sarah adds. “And Alex… and I think even the General’s warming up to the idea of there being a little Chuck running around in the world.”
Chuck has to huff out a laugh - a real one this time - at that. ‘I seriously doubt it,’ he thinks. “We are not letting the CIA build a second substation beneath my baby’s daycare,” Chuck says, playing along.
“Buddy, we will do anything we have to do to help you through this.” And though Chuck’s latest emotional breakdown - hormone-induced or otherwise - seems to have been averted, Morgan keeps talking to keep Chuck smiling. “In fact, if it would make you feel better to curse at someone as a part of your “process”… curse at me! I can take it.”
Chuckling, Chuck lets Sarah and Morgan go, so he can wipe his eyes, and now they let him. “You really couldn’t,” he says, at the same time that Sarah says, “I don’t think so.”
Morgan’s is a watery grin. But his voice is light as he admits, “I really couldn’t. You know me, Chuck. A harsh word from you and I’m mush.”
It’s not the best time for Bryce to show up in the doorway, a step or two behind Casey - while Chuck is scrubbing at his face like a child. ‘At least he didn’t show while I was bawling like a baby.’ Chuck clings to the thought as the room falls silent and everyone stares at one another for a long moment.
“I-” Bryce starts and stops. So unlike his usual smooth-spoken self.
Casey grunts impolitely. “I’m not gonna do your talking for you, too, Larkin, so get your shit together. Walker.” And Casey looks to Sarah and nods at the door, with a glare for Morgan that presumably means the same thing.
“Chuck, you-“
“I’m fine, buddy. You go ahead.” Chuck tells Morgan, noticing the dirty looks and gestures that Morgan is throwing at Bryce but too flustered to ask Morgan to behave.
Bryce hasn’t looked at anyone but Chuck since entering the room.
In seconds, he and Chuck are alone together.
Another thing Chuck’s learned since becoming pregnant? Is that you shouldn’t put off doing anything that needs to be done. (That’s a pretty easy lesson to learn when your belly’s gotten too big for you to double back and take care of something that you’ve forgotten.)
Bryce says, “Chuck, I’m sorry…”
And, at the same time, Chuck says the same basic thing.
Bryce frowns, but otherwise his face is inscrutable. Still, Chuck thinks he detects surprise before Bryce can recover and get his expressions back under complete control.
“Chuck, why are you apologizing to me?”
Chuck would have thought that it was obvious. “For Morgan. And probably Casey,” he says. “They don’t really understand… any of this.” And who could blame them? It’s not every day that their male friend and/or spy partner goes into labor.
But it is sort of starting to freak Chuck out, how intently Bryce is looking at him. Chuck keeps resisting the urge to look down at himself and see what Bryce is staring at, because of course Chuck knows. It’s been months since Bryce has seen Chuck’s stomach, and the sight of it is still startling even to Chuck, who gets to see it every day.
Chuck’s face burns and he picks at his army issue bedcovers. The worst time for Bryce to see Chuck is now - when Chuck looks like he’s swallowed a basketball. Bryce, the guy Chuck has been hopelessly pining for since pretty much the 90’s, and Chuck, the guy wanting miserably to hide. Nothing makes wanting to hide more miserable than the certainty that you can’t.
“Do you?” Bryce asks.
Chuck breathes deeply.
The best answer would be ‘yes.’
Chuck meant what he told Morgan and Sarah. Bryce didn’t technically do anything to owe Chuck the apology he’s nonetheless given Chuck just now. Neither of them knew, when Bryce gave the clinic his ‘sample’ and Chuck registered ‘Mr. Charlie Charles’ for the clinic's revolutionary procedure, that a freaky series of events would end in Chuck actually being operated on and successfully implanted with an artifical womb. Complete with a viable embryo. Bryce didn’t ask to be the father of Chuck’s baby. In fact, he told Chuck flat out that Chuck should get rid of it when Chuck realized that the procedure had actually taken.
So Chuck probably shouldn't have been surprised when he and Bryce had a big fight about Chuck's decision to carry the "embryo" to term instead. Bryce obviously hates the thought of his first (and maybe only? Bryce's never talked about wanting kids) child being born this way. To someone Bryce has no romantic feelings - or, as far as Chuck knows, any feelings whatsoever - towards. Chuck "understands" that Bryce taking off after their fight - on a temporary reassignment the General said Bryce had requested - wasn't Bryce abandoning Chuck. He and Chuck aren't the couple they went into that clinic pretending to be. They're barely even friends at this point. They were just beginning to reclaim that easy companionship they'd shared in college when Chuck made this decision that, apparently, Bryce can't tolerate having been made.
Chuck’s just not sure his heart can understand it.
“Bryce… I get it. I do,” Chuck settles on saying. “You're not cool with this. And I'm sorry that I had to go against your wishes to keep the baby."
An emotion flickers across Bryce’s face again, though this time Chuck can’t say which one. “Chuck…”
“Let me finish. And you are under absolutely no obligation... to do anything, to have any sort of contact with- No one even has to know that the baby is yours! Not even him... or her."
Another flicker. "You don't know which?"
"I- I wanted to be surprised." Chuck tries not to wonder if that makes him even more strange in Bryce's eyes... More pathetic, even perverse. Not only did Chuck choose to go through with this pregnancy, but he actually found himself reveling in certain parts of it. Picking out baby names with his family and friends; readying a nursery. Deciding not to find out the sex of the baby ahead of time. Chuck remembers, somewhat sheepish under Bryce's searching gaze, the first time he felt the baby kick and realized what was happening. He burst into Devon and Ellie's in the middle of the night, almost giving the both of them a heart attack. And then he would have felt embarrassed for it, except that the baby had stopped kicking by then and Ellie was determined to make it start again. She kept Chuck up for hours, poking him in the sides while Devon used a stethoscope to listen to Chuck's stomach, approximating the baby's location so Ellie could wake him or her up.
And speaking of which... The baby is obviously awake now. Chuck's mostly ignored the fluttery movements, but when he receives a particularly sharp kick at the very center of his stomach, Chuck lays a hand over that spot without thinking.
Bryce's eyes immediately catch the gesture. And he shocks Chuck to the core by asking, "Can I-"
He gestures, and it's obvious what he's requesting.
Almost dazed, Chuck nods and moves his hand. Bryce lays his own down in the same spot, his eyes glued to the mound beneath his touch like he expects to see a tiny foot when he feels it.
It's Chuck's turn to stare at Bryce now and he swallows, seeing... something struggling to show itself on Bryce's face once and for all. He forces the rest of what he has to say out before he loses his nerve. Before Bryce can speak his turn and crush Chuck's hopes, however far-fetched, completely.
"I just couldn't kill it, Bryce," Chuck chokes out, snapping Bryce's gaze back to himself. "I couldn't let it go. It- He or she... is a baby. Our baby. It's not what either of us wanted or, obviously, expected, but that's not the baby's fault!" Chuck can feel himself getting worked up over this, but he goes on. "You can be angry, if you want. I don't blame you for how you feel. You don't have to- to claim the baby or anything, but, man. I wish you wouldn't have left. I wish you'd come back. I love-" Chuck barely stops himself from revealing one truth by revealing another. "I love this baby. And I wish you wouldn't hate me for that."
The mask of indifference on Bryce's face finally crumbles. And what remains pierces Chuck, looking at it, because Chuck mistakes the fury in Bryce's expression for being directed at himself. At the same time, Chuck feels something odd right where the baby had kicked him. It's Bryce's hand Chuck is feeling, not the baby. Bryce's hand is shaking.
And Bryce's other hand is reaching for Chuck's throat. No, for Chuck's face. Bryce cups one side of Chuck's face in his palm and kisses Chuck before Chuck can form an intelligent thought about this turn of events.
"I could never- I don't hate you, Chuck. I don't hate the baby," Bryce says against Chuck's lips. And then he pulls back far enough that Chuck sees the wet sheen of his eyes. "I don't want you to pretend that this had nothing to do with me. I want you to have this baby."
Chuck reels with the information.
Bryce continues, "I just wanted to keep you safe more. Chuck, you know how dangerous the operation you're about to have can be."
Chuck knows all the statistics. "I think it's worth the risk."
"I think," Bryce says, looking completely serious, "I couldn't live with myself if you died because of me."
This is all a bit much for Chuck's hormone-addled brain. Besides the fact that Bryce makes two people since Chuck became pregnant to naturally assume that Chuck is going to die on the operating table, Chuck's just been given a solid reason to believe that he's about to have a dream come true.
"You know this isn't your fault, Bryce. What are you saying?"
Bryce doesn't keep him waiting. With a second, shorter, kiss to Chuck's lips, Bryce looks Chuck in the eyes and says, "I'm saying that I love you, Chuck. And if it hadn't sort of terrified me to figure that out, I would have been around to say it to you these last six months. I'm sorry that I wasn't."
Chuck thinks he would be well within his rights to bawl again, right about now - even without pregnancy hormones. But he's far too happy to take advantage, and there are better things he could do with his time before the operation.
Chuck takes Bryce's face in his hands and smiles. "You're here now." And with several hours' time to prove his words true before their son - or daughter - is born.
Bryce makes the most of them.
[end.]