Title: And Sugar We’re Going Down Swinging
Author:
nevcolleilFandom: Chuck
Pairing: Chuck/Bryce
1sentence Theme set: Alpha
Rating: PG-13
Warning[s]: Character Death (canon and non); various Aus; more than the usual amount of angst in my experience with these :p
AO3 #01 - Comfort
The truth should be a cold comfort with Bryce long dead and gone, but Chuck digs all of the memorabilia from his days at Stanford out of the garbage and feels better for the first time in ages.
#02 - Kiss
Their first kiss is for show - for their cover; Chuck doesn’t literally swoon (thank God - hello, embarrassing!) but he’s mortifyingly close by the time Bryce pulls back, a gleam in his eye, and licks his lips.
#03 - Soft
The thing that people don’t get about Chuck is this: he’s not soft, he’s just gentle; he’s not foolish, he’s just naïve, and Bryce will kill or be killed to keep him that way.
#04 - Pain
Chuck had thought that his father’s abandonment had hurt him, that Bryce’s betrayal had stung; as Bryce lies beside him and dies Chuck feels pain for the first time in his life.
#05 - Potatoes
They’re having one of their “cover dates” with Ellie and Awesome, and Chuck is watching Bryce laugh with his sister over a plate of pot roast and potatoes when he realizes that he wants this to be real - needs it to be real - so badly.
#06 - Rain
They’re both soaked to the bone, rumpled like forgotten laundry, but when Bryce sees that Chuck is alive he takes Chuck’s bloodied face gently in his hands and thinks it’s the most beautiful thing he’s fucking seen; the rain hides his tears.
#07 - Chocolate
Bryce has an honest-to-god chocolate fetish, and Chuck makes certain that their kitchen is stocked with every species of chocolate he can get his hands on.
#08 - Happiness
Happiness is finding out that the lover who burned you really loves you after all; happiness is finding out that the love you thought you had to lose to protect forgave you before you even asked.
#09 - Telephone
It seems like a dream, but it’s real - it’s really Bryce’s voice on the telephone, and Chuck’s heart clenches with terrible, irresistible hope.
#10 - Ears
Even Chuck’s ears turn pink as he blushes at that one, and the sight is cute enough that Bryce decides he is mostly averse to killing the Prime Minister for his brazen comments; “Why, yes, your Eminency, we do make them pretty back home, but I don’t have to pay for my companions.”
#11 - Name
Chuck rues the day the nickname “Mad Dog” started getting around; Bryce teases him about it constantly, even in bed, which is just wrong.
#12 - Sensual
Bryce is the most overtly sensual person Chuck has ever met - he’s a virtual master at manipulating the senses to turn a man into mush, and it boggles Chuck’s mind that Bryce has done such a good job of convincing the others that he’s this cold, hard spy that can’t turn his work self off at the end of the night.
#13 - Death
Bryce has cheated death so many times - Chuck can’t, won’t, accept what his eyes and shaking hands confirm.
#14 - Sex
The sex is like something out of a teenaged boy’s best dreams, but better - Chuck’s giant brain struggles to grasp the many intricacies of the awesomeness that is sex with Bryce.
#15 - Touch
When he gets out of bed Chuck is already in the kitchen - cooking pancakes and singing ‘Touching me, touching you…’ - in his boxer shorts; Bryce wraps his arms around Chuck from behind and tries to soak up the feeling of home.
#16 - Weakness
Chuck is Bryce’s only weakness - always has been, always will be; he tells himself that hurting Chuck this way is for the best - it could save them both - but betraying Chuck makes Bryce feel the opposite of saved.
#17 - Tears
As far as anyone else knows, Chuck never cried about Stanford, not even about Jill, but Ellie knows he shed a tear or two over losing his friendship with Bryce.
#18 - Speed
Bryce is a little bit of a speed demon; Chuck doesn’t care for high speeds (heights, altitudes, what have you) but he doesn’t mind them if it’s Bryce in the driver’s seat.
#19 - Wind
The wind steals his words as he screams; Casey and Sarah are running towards the scene, but they won’t make it in time - Chuck knows it before he sees the men roll Bryce’s body into their van and speed away.
#20 - Freedom
It’s all right there in front of him: his path to freedom - to escaping the Intersect, the spy life, the danger - his salvation; “Bryce, wait, I- I want to go with you.”
#21 - Life
“You- You’d really do that for me - give up spying, your whole life?” Chuck asks, and: “Chuck, you are my life,” Bryce answers.
#22 - Jealousy
Chuck can’t help but be jealous - Bryce is gorgeous, brave, intelligent; Bryce could have anyone he wants, and who would want Chuck if he could have Sarah?
#23 - Hands
“If he ever puts his hands on you again, Chuck, I’m going to kill him,” Bryce says; Chuck doesn’t know whether to be frightened, flattered… or aroused, so he settles on all three.
#24 - Taste<
Chuck is so far gone he could wax poetic on the taste of Bryce’s skin, and he does; he’s enough of a geek not to care if it’s not a cool thing to do, and it makes Bryce smile in that real way of his that only comes out when he’s alone with Chuck.
#25 - Devotion
Bryce knows that he’s lost Chuck’s faith in him; Chuck doesn’t understand: Bryce will do anything for Chuck, to Chuck - anything he has to - so long as he’s kept Chuck safe in the end.
#26 - Forever
He’s pretty sure there will be no forever for them - he knows that his life is going to end short and bloody - but that’s not going to happen to Chuck so Bryce lets Chuck believe in forever if he wants to; Bryce even plays along sometimes - because it’s a nice thought, isn’t it?
#27 - Blood
His boyfriend is a total badass - Bryce licks the blood from the corner of his mouth and straightens his tux and it‘s like nothing even happened; “Wow,” Chuck says as he surveys the bodies and Bryce smirks.
#28 - Sickness
“If I take this, I’ll be risking Ellie’s life, and if we don’t find any more antidote then you’re going to die on me too, so please, Bryce - let me give it to her instead.”
#29 - Melody
Jeff and Lester are still going at it out in the courtyard, and “Jukebox Hero” isn’t exactly mood music for makeup sex, but Bryce won’t complain.
#30 - Star
Chuck should know by now that Bryce can’t be tempted away by a pretty face and some plastic surgery, but he enjoys the Hollywood assignment because Chuck is cute when he’s jealous over the starlets that keep throwing themselves at Bryce.
#31 - Home
For a long time he didn’t have anything even remotely resembling a home; now home is a little cul-de-sac, a poster of Tron hanging in the bedroom, and a shoe box containing a glock and garrot wire stashed under the bed (because there are some things about his past life that can’t be completely let go.)
#32 - Confusion
In the confusion and the chaos following the explosion, the others either don’t notice or don’t understand Bryce’s wide-eyed stare, directed - frozen - towards the fire; “Larkin, the Intersect is gone - get out of there!” travels through his ear piece, but Bryce can only kneel in the face of the flames and try to breathe.
#33 - Fear
Chuck’s afraid to admit it, but he’s still waiting for the other shoe to drop; Bryce has seemed to be on his side before, and if he turns on Chuck now the way it seemed that he’d turned on Chuck then, the disappointment might kill him.
#34 - Lightning/Thunder
His first weekend at Stanford, away from home and Ellie and normalcy, there was this terrible storm that combined with Chuck‘s homesickness to make for a sleepless night; Bryce stayed up with him and they played a Star Trek drinking game until they both passed out on top of Bryce’s bed.
#35 - Bonds
They don’t understand why Bryce asked for him, he doesn’t fully understand it himself; he can’t explain why he wants to go with Bryce on this either, but there is this thing between them - this bond - that nothing, not absence or betrayal or even Bryce’s supposed death has lessened.
#36 - Market
Bryce shouldn’t have sent him out this time - Chuck’s angry and hurt and he’s being petulant; “Goddamn it, Larkin, your boy toy’s gonna get his fool self killed!” Casey grumbles when Chuck waltzes up to their arms dealer and plops down his suitcase, ordering a shipment of Gatling guns with a smile on his face as Bryce sighs.
#37 - Technology
Chuck is, technically, part machine and used to being treated - by the General, by the Ring - like a piece of valued technology, but when Bryce hears someone refer to Chuck as “it”, “the Intersect”, he is mad enough to kill.
#38 - Gift
In the weeks following Bryce’s death, Sarah complains that Chuck is unlike himself - too angry, too quiet, too bitter, and Chuck agrees - the old him would have viewed the time he’d had with Bryce between deaths as a gift and moved on, but the new Chuck just wants to see Bryce’s murderers bleed.
#39 - Smile
‘It’s the smile,’ Bryce told her, grinning, one time when Sarah asked - before she’d been able to see it for herself; with Bryce gone, Sarah wonders if she’ll ever see the thing Bryce had loved most about Chuck again.
#40 - Innocence
Chuck’s lost a lot of the naiveté that he’d had when he met Bryce; he’s lost his innocence, and it’s all because of Bryce (in more ways than one.)
#41 - Completion
He’s more than repaid his country for anything they might have done for him, he’s gone above and beyond the call of duty; “General, please, I just want this one thing - I just want to stay with Chuck, please.”
#42 - Clouds
They used to play the spot-shapes-in-the-clouds game and Bryce would say normal stuff like ‘bunny’ or ‘porche’ or ‘Ferenghi’, but now that all the secrets are out between them Bryce can be honest and tell Chuck ‘cluster bomb’ or ‘butterfly knife’ or- okay, yeah, he still sees the ‘Ferenghi’.
#43 - Sky
The sky is as blue as Bryce’s eyes, sunny and bright above them and getting brighter, warmer, burning straight through Chuck’s chest until he cannot breathe, and Bryce is saying, “Just hold on, Chuck,” voice broken, pressing down hard on Chuck’s chest like he’s trying to hold the sunlight in as it cooks Chuck numb.
#44 - Heaven
If there’s a Heaven, Chuck knows Bryce went there, no matter what he did as a spy; he’s probably sipping dry martinis with a bunch of heavenly Bond girls that Chuck will have to beat off with a stick when it’s his turn to check out.
#45 - Hell
There is a Hell - and it resides in a rundown old concert venue where busted speakers assault Bryce’s ears with Jeffster‘s badly-performed covers of REO Speedwagon’s greatest hits; “Patience, patience… I know you’ve just got back, but I promised the guys we’d be here, and we can sneak away for sex after the next set.”
#46 - Sun
They lay out on the beach together for too long and come back from vacation burnt as toast, and they have to scrap an operation because no one will buy his cover as a reclusive billionaire while he’s sunburnt, but the getaway was so worth the General’s displeasure.
#47 - Moon
Their reports assign numbers to each country they visit - body counts, timelines, collateral damage - but the only numbers that really stick in Chuck’s memory are of the times Chuck and Bryce have made love beneath a foreign moon.
#48 - Waves
Waves lap at their entwined legs as they lie on the sand - the spy life may be grueling, but it has its dividends.
#49 - Hair
Bryce has magazine model-perfect hair; Chuck wants to give Bryce a noogie every time he looks at him, just to muss it up.
#50 - Supernova
The pictures, colors, impressions spear into his brain and explode - a supernova of secrets, more consuming than the one the first Intersect had detonated in his mind; Chuck feels only the pain in his chest, Bryce’s corpse the lone witness of - and the catalyst to - Chuck’s sacrifice.