"Roller derby will change your life..." is what I tell people. No one believes me til its too late.
You know roller derby has taken over your life when:
~There's a crumpled receipt for a mouthguard on the fridge, and scribbled on the back is a phone number and the name Chassis Crass.
~The magazines on the back of the toilet are comprised of USA Roller Sports magazines, Thrasher, and skate/wheel catalogs
~The papers scattered on the kitchen table include any of the following, at any time: USARS insurance renewal forms, bout flyers, bout ticket stubs, old programs, TRD contact lists, coaching schedule for the month, bout lineups, etc.
~You are more likely to stub your toe on a skate tool/wheels/gearbag than furniture.
~An entire load of laundry can be simply fishnets, brightly colored tights, kneehigh socks and tiny spandex shorts.
~It's hard to find a shirt that hasn't been ruined by practices or doesn't say anything derby related on it.
~You have no problems borrowing extra bearing oil but neither you or your roommate have a decent can-opener.
~The dogs know they are not allowed to be near you while you're cleaning/maintaining skates/wheels/bearings.
~The vast majority of email in your inbox is roller derby related.
~More than half the snail mail in your mailbox is roller derby related.
~Strangers recognize you walking your dog down the street... and will stop you and ask if you are "one of those roller derby girls".
~Your non-roller derby friends are used to not seeing you except at the bouts because you're always at practice or scrimmage.
~You begin shopping with a new purpose: all clothes are judged on the simple basis that they must be suitable for skating in.
~You no longer see the point in buying socks that are not kneehighs... and they MUST be obnoxiously colorful and/or patterned.
~Any previous skill you had for being able to put together matching outfits flies out the window. Trying to match kneehighs, tights, skirt and shirt is too much work. You no longer care.
~Pants are COMPLETELY overrated. You avoid wearing them at all costs.
~Your stovetop gets the most use out of boiling pots of water so you can form a new mouthguard.
~You have been referred to as "Miss Roller Derby pants".
~and countless other things that make me smile as I go throughout my day. Walk through your life and take a look at what vastly overpowers your existence.
If you have other things that show how derby obsessed you are, leave a comment with them. I enjoy reading how crazy other people are, too. :)
~There's a crumpled receipt for a mouthguard on the fridge, and scribbled on the back is a phone number and the name Chassis Crass.
~The magazines on the back of the toilet are comprised of USA Roller Sports magazines, Thrasher, and skate/wheel catalogs
~The papers scattered on the kitchen table include any of the following, at any time: USARS insurance renewal forms, bout flyers, bout ticket stubs, old programs, TRD contact lists, coaching schedule for the month, bout lineups, etc.
~You are more likely to stub your toe on a skate tool/wheels/gearbag than furniture.
~An entire load of laundry can be simply fishnets, brightly colored tights, kneehigh socks and tiny spandex shorts.
~It's hard to find a shirt that hasn't been ruined by practices or doesn't say anything derby related on it.
~You have no problems borrowing extra bearing oil but neither you or your roommate have a decent can-opener.
~The dogs know they are not allowed to be near you while you're cleaning/maintaining skates/wheels/bearings.
~The vast majority of email in your inbox is roller derby related.
~More than half the snail mail in your mailbox is roller derby related.
~Strangers recognize you walking your dog down the street... and will stop you and ask if you are "one of those roller derby girls".
~Your non-roller derby friends are used to not seeing you except at the bouts because you're always at practice or scrimmage.
~You begin shopping with a new purpose: all clothes are judged on the simple basis that they must be suitable for skating in.
~You no longer see the point in buying socks that are not kneehighs... and they MUST be obnoxiously colorful and/or patterned.
~Any previous skill you had for being able to put together matching outfits flies out the window. Trying to match kneehighs, tights, skirt and shirt is too much work. You no longer care.
~Pants are COMPLETELY overrated. You avoid wearing them at all costs.
~Your stovetop gets the most use out of boiling pots of water so you can form a new mouthguard.
~You have been referred to as "Miss Roller Derby pants".
~and countless other things that make me smile as I go throughout my day. Walk through your life and take a look at what vastly overpowers your existence.
If you have other things that show how derby obsessed you are, leave a comment with them. I enjoy reading how crazy other people are, too. :)