(no subject)
I had just been thinking about you, wondering if I regretted all of it. I don't regret the time spent with you, the inherent dishonesty of the situation, the things I said (despite faslehoods due to dishonesty with myself), or even the pain.
I regret the wasted time, the times I waited, the times I hurt when you didn't came, the time I wasted with you when we refused to accept the truth of the matter.
There was a boy here a few minutes ago, and I didn't think much of him until he spoke; your voice came from his mouth. Your inflection, your humor, and when he left, he said "adios" in your way. This was the first time that anyone here has reminded me of you so strongly. The rebirth of romance, the kisses during thunderstorms, the long talks on the porch, the pounding heart and the weak knees, and all the goodbyes.
Things changed once I saw you with matured eyes. All those beautiful words, no matter how much you meant them, were only words. You seemed pretentious, long winded, and utterly lost, grasping at reality through a veil of adjectives that never actually described life. "Everybody's lonely and insecure" -- at least that much was true. I thought you were what I wanted to become; now that I'm closer to that, I realize that you are what I was afraid of becoming.
I'm not bitter, but I am glad you're gone. The memories and lessons were worth it.
I regret the wasted time, the times I waited, the times I hurt when you didn't came, the time I wasted with you when we refused to accept the truth of the matter.
There was a boy here a few minutes ago, and I didn't think much of him until he spoke; your voice came from his mouth. Your inflection, your humor, and when he left, he said "adios" in your way. This was the first time that anyone here has reminded me of you so strongly. The rebirth of romance, the kisses during thunderstorms, the long talks on the porch, the pounding heart and the weak knees, and all the goodbyes.
Things changed once I saw you with matured eyes. All those beautiful words, no matter how much you meant them, were only words. You seemed pretentious, long winded, and utterly lost, grasping at reality through a veil of adjectives that never actually described life. "Everybody's lonely and insecure" -- at least that much was true. I thought you were what I wanted to become; now that I'm closer to that, I realize that you are what I was afraid of becoming.
I'm not bitter, but I am glad you're gone. The memories and lessons were worth it.