home again home again jiggity jig
I've been in Moco for about a week now.
Working at graduation was a bittersweet deal. Seeing everyone in their caps and gowns made me itch for next May when it'll be my turn. My subsequent yearly post-graduation depression lasted for a few days as I slept till 1pm and didn't really leave the house. It's not really the change that bothers me, rather it's the time in between the old and the new that I can't stand. Sure this summer and next year will be great and full of new and (I'm sure) enlightenting experiences, but I'm stuck in the part where you have to adjust your mind and schedule before you can continue living.
Some of the people most integral to my life experiences won't be a short walk or drive away anymore. They'll have jobs, lives, new cities, and even children to be busy with. I kind of wish we could all stay 20 forever and live in this goddamned bubble.
On the other hand, I can't wait for real life to start. I want to make moves and changes and be a real person (within the confines of academia, of course).
One thing I've learned from the past month, and most certainly the past semester is that I can in no way know the future. As cliche and corny as it may sound, you really never know what is going to happen. We shouldn't live in the past and look with hope to the future; and DEFINITELY be content with the now. You can't change what has already happened and no way can you know what might, but what you have now is precious - don't waste it - it's all we have.
Christ, I sound like a friggin motivational speaker. But I think I can only truly be happy when I put my worries and grudges to rest and be happy with what I have. I think that's one of the hardest things to do. It's easy to lament and dwell on the past because it's already happened. It is also easy to look forward to the future because it's the unknown, but accepting what you do know and have now is the tricky part.
I think I say the same shit every year around this time but it's definitely not a bad idea to come back to.
Working at graduation was a bittersweet deal. Seeing everyone in their caps and gowns made me itch for next May when it'll be my turn. My subsequent yearly post-graduation depression lasted for a few days as I slept till 1pm and didn't really leave the house. It's not really the change that bothers me, rather it's the time in between the old and the new that I can't stand. Sure this summer and next year will be great and full of new and (I'm sure) enlightenting experiences, but I'm stuck in the part where you have to adjust your mind and schedule before you can continue living.
Some of the people most integral to my life experiences won't be a short walk or drive away anymore. They'll have jobs, lives, new cities, and even children to be busy with. I kind of wish we could all stay 20 forever and live in this goddamned bubble.
On the other hand, I can't wait for real life to start. I want to make moves and changes and be a real person (within the confines of academia, of course).
One thing I've learned from the past month, and most certainly the past semester is that I can in no way know the future. As cliche and corny as it may sound, you really never know what is going to happen. We shouldn't live in the past and look with hope to the future; and DEFINITELY be content with the now. You can't change what has already happened and no way can you know what might, but what you have now is precious - don't waste it - it's all we have.
Christ, I sound like a friggin motivational speaker. But I think I can only truly be happy when I put my worries and grudges to rest and be happy with what I have. I think that's one of the hardest things to do. It's easy to lament and dwell on the past because it's already happened. It is also easy to look forward to the future because it's the unknown, but accepting what you do know and have now is the tricky part.
I think I say the same shit every year around this time but it's definitely not a bad idea to come back to.