so tired . . .
even when i'm not getting in trouble, i still feel like i am. why is that? i suspect there is some sort of response that has been ingrained in me since childhood and it may simply be something i can't change. not that it happens often anyway. but when it does, i can't shrug it off.
in other regards, am i creating self-panic? or do i instinctually just know something that is so big and huge that i am in denial because what else could i do with something so massive? this new realm of questions and thoughts that this theoretical situation is bringing up are big. is this something to embrace? or just questions to help me confirm what i've always wanted?
i'm still so happy. but oh so tired. and when you're this tired, it's hard to feel much of anything else. why am i so tired? i even napped today.
tonight i called. and he said he'd just been thinking about me. i asked what was he thinking. he said how beautiful i am. i asked really? he said yes and that he probably doesn't say it enough. i said i don't think he's ever told me that. he said, you are.
and i thanked him. and i believed him. how good is that?
in other regards, am i creating self-panic? or do i instinctually just know something that is so big and huge that i am in denial because what else could i do with something so massive? this new realm of questions and thoughts that this theoretical situation is bringing up are big. is this something to embrace? or just questions to help me confirm what i've always wanted?
i'm still so happy. but oh so tired. and when you're this tired, it's hard to feel much of anything else. why am i so tired? i even napped today.
tonight i called. and he said he'd just been thinking about me. i asked what was he thinking. he said how beautiful i am. i asked really? he said yes and that he probably doesn't say it enough. i said i don't think he's ever told me that. he said, you are.
and i thanked him. and i believed him. how good is that?