Nothings like being held sometimes
hmm..well i guess this can be my venting entry.
-here it goes-
well im not even real sure where i should start. life is just soooo confusing sometimes (mostly all the time) its weird how everyone wants the same thing, but most of the time they never go eachother to look for it. its hard not to feel the same as everyone else does, even when its not a sure thing that we all want and feel the same way. maybe its just me, who knows? sometimes i wonder if i should just sit and wait for it to come to me like its "supposed to" but sometimes i feel like you have to work to get something. or maybe that theory is true, "you never know what you have till its gone". i really miss being who i was when i had that, but its my fault why i am at this certain place now. is it too late? i would think so being that we've moved on, or atleast the other has. its hard, but theres nothing i can do about it. in the whole process of everything that has been going on, i've realized who my true friends are. yes, i believe i've lost some for stupid reason that even i am unaware of but i guess its a good thing that i didn't waste my time. im sorry if i couldn't fill those shoes you expected me to, but i couldn't bare the pain of being hurt again. why is life so full of pain? it seems like most the time is full with deception, or major duplicity. i'd say that history does in fact repeat itself, so im numb to it in a way. even though as much as id like i wish i wasen't, we both know that i can't do anything about that. life is too short to go on dwelling on things, but its hard not to. frankly, theres nothing i can do about things i have taken for granted. but if i could, id take it back, and start all over. i guess all i can do now, is be thankful for the kids that actually stood me during everything, cause only God knows whats gonna happen next. i just wish i could find someone that would mean the world to me, and he would feel the same. i understand that sort of thing takes time, and believe me when i say im willing to wait for it. so till next time.
-here it goes-
well im not even real sure where i should start. life is just soooo confusing sometimes (mostly all the time) its weird how everyone wants the same thing, but most of the time they never go eachother to look for it. its hard not to feel the same as everyone else does, even when its not a sure thing that we all want and feel the same way. maybe its just me, who knows? sometimes i wonder if i should just sit and wait for it to come to me like its "supposed to" but sometimes i feel like you have to work to get something. or maybe that theory is true, "you never know what you have till its gone". i really miss being who i was when i had that, but its my fault why i am at this certain place now. is it too late? i would think so being that we've moved on, or atleast the other has. its hard, but theres nothing i can do about it. in the whole process of everything that has been going on, i've realized who my true friends are. yes, i believe i've lost some for stupid reason that even i am unaware of but i guess its a good thing that i didn't waste my time. im sorry if i couldn't fill those shoes you expected me to, but i couldn't bare the pain of being hurt again. why is life so full of pain? it seems like most the time is full with deception, or major duplicity. i'd say that history does in fact repeat itself, so im numb to it in a way. even though as much as id like i wish i wasen't, we both know that i can't do anything about that. life is too short to go on dwelling on things, but its hard not to. frankly, theres nothing i can do about things i have taken for granted. but if i could, id take it back, and start all over. i guess all i can do now, is be thankful for the kids that actually stood me during everything, cause only God knows whats gonna happen next. i just wish i could find someone that would mean the world to me, and he would feel the same. i understand that sort of thing takes time, and believe me when i say im willing to wait for it. so till next time.