Body troubles
I just got home from work a while ago and what a disaster it was. It was a barmitzpha and the mother hadn't prepared anything. The coordinator was flipping out because the mother hadn't done the place cards so she asked me to do it. I was glad to help, as long as I wasn't in the hall doing boring, dizzying work. Serving was horrible, everyone was demanding and rude to me and asking me for stupid shit. One guy asked me for butter, I'm like "Umm, it's not kosher I can't give it to you." Doesn't a guy at a barmitzpha know that's not kosher? I'm not even Jewish and I know that. Then on top of that they kept asking for food that they didn't order. Vegetarians wanted the meat and the carnivores wanted the cous cous. Then they would purposely ask for more, even though I could see their plate was heaping, then would ask if i could wrap it up for them. Seriously?! I've never encountered this. Usually people aren't so greedy at the functions we hold and just eat until they're full. Thank God I left early.
My boyfriend picked me up at around 10:45 and I had been worrying about my period. I have it right now but it's very light and the blood is brown. I'm worried because I got my period 2 weeks ago but it was kinda weird but now 2 weeks later, I'm spotting. I immediately thought I was pregnant, but I don't feel pregnant. I told him to drive me around to a pharmacy so I could "get something". Then he kept asking what it was and I told him it was a pregnancy test. I was worrying and crying because I was afraid I was going to have to go to the one next to my house and I was afraid a family member would be there and see me buying a fucking pregnancy test. I ended up going to that one, and I'm glad I did. I was there yesterday picking up the clonazapam and thank God that the same pharmacist was there. I told her my problem and it was good she knew all about my meds and problems so she really helped. She said it was probably because I stopped the Prozac so abrubptly and was having many panic attacks and taking Ativan to stop them, which in turn probably affected my hormones. She told me sincerely in that non-pharmacist voice "Honestly, I don't think you're pregnant." and was reliveved. I went back to the car and we went for some pizza.
I started crying in the car because I just didn't know what to do. He held my hand and I calmed down and we went to the pizza place. We started joking about those teenagers that show PDA in the subways and behind dumpsters and how it looks so ghetto. We got some pizza and I just started crying and talking to him about breaking up. I felt like I was going to do it right then and there but he said really supportive things to me like if I was feeling crazy, it was ok to be alone and he would give me space. That made me feel a lot better and I just didn't want to do it anymore. He made me realize I was convincing myself of things that aren't true and I need to find a way to relax and forget about it and to get on the right meds. For the rest of the night we joked and loved each other.
He drove me home and I felt very good. I felt like I haven't felt in a while. Satisfied, calm, loved. It was a nice feeling. Ones that I'd like to experience from know on.
My boyfriend picked me up at around 10:45 and I had been worrying about my period. I have it right now but it's very light and the blood is brown. I'm worried because I got my period 2 weeks ago but it was kinda weird but now 2 weeks later, I'm spotting. I immediately thought I was pregnant, but I don't feel pregnant. I told him to drive me around to a pharmacy so I could "get something". Then he kept asking what it was and I told him it was a pregnancy test. I was worrying and crying because I was afraid I was going to have to go to the one next to my house and I was afraid a family member would be there and see me buying a fucking pregnancy test. I ended up going to that one, and I'm glad I did. I was there yesterday picking up the clonazapam and thank God that the same pharmacist was there. I told her my problem and it was good she knew all about my meds and problems so she really helped. She said it was probably because I stopped the Prozac so abrubptly and was having many panic attacks and taking Ativan to stop them, which in turn probably affected my hormones. She told me sincerely in that non-pharmacist voice "Honestly, I don't think you're pregnant." and was reliveved. I went back to the car and we went for some pizza.
I started crying in the car because I just didn't know what to do. He held my hand and I calmed down and we went to the pizza place. We started joking about those teenagers that show PDA in the subways and behind dumpsters and how it looks so ghetto. We got some pizza and I just started crying and talking to him about breaking up. I felt like I was going to do it right then and there but he said really supportive things to me like if I was feeling crazy, it was ok to be alone and he would give me space. That made me feel a lot better and I just didn't want to do it anymore. He made me realize I was convincing myself of things that aren't true and I need to find a way to relax and forget about it and to get on the right meds. For the rest of the night we joked and loved each other.
He drove me home and I felt very good. I felt like I haven't felt in a while. Satisfied, calm, loved. It was a nice feeling. Ones that I'd like to experience from know on.