(no subject)

[nerdy_goth]

there is this teacher at school I like. Hes around my age ( I am one of the oldest people at this school) and he is so adorable. I wish I had the guts to go up to him and at least say hi . I wonder if he is married or has a g/f. what I am going to do is on the last day of school ( when I get out ) I am going to put a note on his car with my number on it . if he calls he calls if not oh well. I am happy I am almost done with school . I have come a long way from last jan . I just hope old ghost from teh past dont catch up with me . I want to start over fresh and have a new outlook on life. I want to start clean and have new friends. if I can ever make any. I also gladd I dont talk to marco over the phone anymore . he was making it hard for me to get over him. we talk on line here and there . but over the phone, it was KILLING ME . Making me want him again and again. getting over him is hard but it is comming along. then there is andrew. hes a nice kid and all , but im not physically attracted to him. I just liek him as a friend. we do cool things together, like going to the movies and out to fairs, he makes me feel like a kid again. when I getout of school im going to do a whoel 100% change aournd. I will be different you will all see. I suck at picking up men. I wish someone decent would like me for who I am . not what I look like. I know I need to lose some weight and so forth, but it can be done. just take me as I am . I cannot wait for september and october to roll around. there are going to be soem fun times. two great concerts to go to . cannot wait !!!!=) =)
Life has been one crazy hell. I hope it calms down for a little while. and lets me enjoy it . I havent been able to in a long long while. its was just always worrie worrie worrie . not I can sit back and relax I think . but with my guard up. well ta ta for now
cheers!