(no subject)
I feel really good right now. maybe half because I've spent the past coupple hours listening to a mixture of Ravi Shankar, Flogging Molly and Ben Folds. It's just making me really happy. and I took a bath. with candles. and it smelled amazing. and it was just nice. andI've been alone since I got home. went to Andrew's with Rahul and Saadh today. that was a lot of fun. ate noodles on the trampoline. was very yummy. Then Peter brought me home. and. I'm not sure.. I'm just in a good mood.. I feel like I'm not sure what.
I miss my cousins. I miss just kind of siting around with them and talking about whatever. or seeing the guys play football. or even just watching the little ones. I just kindof miss that whole atmostphere of us all being together. I miss grandma's old house, how no matter what it felt warm and lived in in there and in the new house. sure. it's her house. but it just doesnt feel right. It's like if you had the perfect cottage and you moved into a little generic house. with nothing special about it. I mean. it's a nice house. it's beautiful. It's amazing what Aunt Francine and Uncle Ron and everyone did with the house over about two weeks. I just miss her old house.. I miss the hippie attic with battleship in it and vodka and gin bottles filled with water on the walls. I feel like I've lost that part of my childhood. I wish I could move in there and I dont know. just live in the attic. or the basement with all the stuff from my aunts and uncles childhood in there. There's probably still the tiny ironing board I have a picture of my mom using. and when we were ittle when we would play around in the kitchen and christmases there. We havent had a family christmas that I've been to in years.. I miss that so much. I don't even know why. It's just. I havent seen my cousins seriously since the summer after freshman year. and I miss just having time to chill with them.. *sigh*
I feel like I'm getting sick..I'm really sad about that.. I hate being sick. but I half want the feeling of just lying in bed all day and feeling safe. and warm. but. I hate missing school. If I get sick. I'llhave to do it on a four day. though It's my favourite of our schedule. I'll miss it in hopes of not missing anything potentially important in pysics or math. I wish winter would just come. so that it can get cold. so that it can snow. I just want it to snow. and be pretty. so that I can be happy. I swear. I'm going to Syracuse for college. I believe it has all the majors I've looked at. and It's a good school. and.. there's snow up there.. *sigh* I'll just freeze.. a lot..
I'm thinking I'm going to go lie down. and chillax with sitar-ness
I miss my cousins. I miss just kind of siting around with them and talking about whatever. or seeing the guys play football. or even just watching the little ones. I just kindof miss that whole atmostphere of us all being together. I miss grandma's old house, how no matter what it felt warm and lived in in there and in the new house. sure. it's her house. but it just doesnt feel right. It's like if you had the perfect cottage and you moved into a little generic house. with nothing special about it. I mean. it's a nice house. it's beautiful. It's amazing what Aunt Francine and Uncle Ron and everyone did with the house over about two weeks. I just miss her old house.. I miss the hippie attic with battleship in it and vodka and gin bottles filled with water on the walls. I feel like I've lost that part of my childhood. I wish I could move in there and I dont know. just live in the attic. or the basement with all the stuff from my aunts and uncles childhood in there. There's probably still the tiny ironing board I have a picture of my mom using. and when we were ittle when we would play around in the kitchen and christmases there. We havent had a family christmas that I've been to in years.. I miss that so much. I don't even know why. It's just. I havent seen my cousins seriously since the summer after freshman year. and I miss just having time to chill with them.. *sigh*
I feel like I'm getting sick..I'm really sad about that.. I hate being sick. but I half want the feeling of just lying in bed all day and feeling safe. and warm. but. I hate missing school. If I get sick. I'llhave to do it on a four day. though It's my favourite of our schedule. I'll miss it in hopes of not missing anything potentially important in pysics or math. I wish winter would just come. so that it can get cold. so that it can snow. I just want it to snow. and be pretty. so that I can be happy. I swear. I'm going to Syracuse for college. I believe it has all the majors I've looked at. and It's a good school. and.. there's snow up there.. *sigh* I'll just freeze.. a lot..
I'm thinking I'm going to go lie down. and chillax with sitar-ness