(no subject)
I wonder very often how things would be if we had been together, or better yet had gotten together and stayed that way. While our personalities are the same, we're leading two very different lives, and I wonder if, really, things would have worked out...but what pains me the most is that I don't even know that for sure. Would bad results have been better than none at all? Because anything could be more bearable than this impassable point I'm at now.
Yeah, we joke around, and yes we do see each other and I truly love every second of it...but now, I have to stay distracted. As much as I want to hold your hand, kiss you, those times are pretty much gone. And so, I joke and fool around, I remind myself constantly of my failed efforts, and that these are the seeds I've sown. Another time, another place...but not this one.
There's this weird silence between us, one I might be simply imagining, but this time I think I'm right on this one. It's hard to explain...I don't even know where to begin. All I know is that I'm, at this point, only beating myself up. Living in the past, living with regrets...that's not the kind of life I lead anymore.
But some people are a lot harder to let go of than others.
Yeah, we joke around, and yes we do see each other and I truly love every second of it...but now, I have to stay distracted. As much as I want to hold your hand, kiss you, those times are pretty much gone. And so, I joke and fool around, I remind myself constantly of my failed efforts, and that these are the seeds I've sown. Another time, another place...but not this one.
There's this weird silence between us, one I might be simply imagining, but this time I think I'm right on this one. It's hard to explain...I don't even know where to begin. All I know is that I'm, at this point, only beating myself up. Living in the past, living with regrets...that's not the kind of life I lead anymore.
But some people are a lot harder to let go of than others.