(no subject)
Dear Eddie, I hope you can understand me one day. I say things that I don't mean, I change my mind every other day. My feelings are explosive and ever changing. I hope you can understand that my actions don't always reflect my emotions. I hope I can show you how loyal I am and how deeply I feel for you, and how I have always felt this way. I'm still trying to figure out the whole chuck thing.. I've never loved him, I was just lonely and he was always there. I'm soooo happy nothing happened with that.I know now that it was just a pathetic cry for attention. I can't wait to show you how crazy in love I am with you and I can't wait to love you as fiercely and unyieldingly as I have always hoped. It frightens me to think how bad I have wanted this. But what scares me more is why neither of us acted upon it. Yesterday you said that everything held no meaning, that I meant so much more than anything around us. You told me you have loved me since the moment you met me. Well, I have to. And I can't wait to spend as much time as I can with you my darling. It feels so good to be sure about my feelings, to have no doubts, and no constant looming fear. I feel free and powerful and magnificent!
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