No Nobyo November
Nut again LJ... Get it, not? I'm kidding. It's my stupid coping mechanic that fancies such new things are at it again. As November slowly counting the days 'till our imminent demis- I meant, 'till Decemeber comes along and the end of the year.
Anyway, it's customary challenge over the internet to not "nut" or shave or whatnot during the month of November. What initially started as two men who like mustaches, transformed into a movement for cancer awareness- No Shave November became such a meme that other movements followed suit like the No Nut one or the No Bra- wherein this case, was originally a day in July but is now moved to October which is well known for observing breast cancer month. Sure I'm skipping a lot of details, but it is what it is.
Now back to me where I gloriously failed either of those. I nutted completely forgetting the challenge, and the tourney that I signed up in. Well, a bench warmer has to warm those benches. kRar. And I shaved just look a bit fresh for my cousins wedding and to please a bit the ever so commentative relatives. There was hardly any piece of struggle as I absently mindedly do the things I shouldn't.
As for the title of this post, well, it's complicated. While I keep spiraling down in despair and delusions for Erika- not her real name, I try to keep myself fresh for the other fishies in the sea. Well, not really? But if there is such a huge opening right? Riiiight? I mean, there should be a pain limit where our poor little heart can take, right? I don't know really. Ever since that "No" or rejection, life turned out like it's some sort of lame survival series where you do mundane stuff just to get by. Everyday events felt like a coping mechanic. I really like Erika but- yes there is a "but", a huge one, but such life circumstances placed a huge wall between us leading to that heart wrenching response.
While I teeter round the stages of grief whether it's 5 or 7, I am somewhere in the Acceptance stage or The Upward Turn stage where much of the anger and despair have calmed down and is leaning to hopeful tomorrow. Or at least I think. I mean, I haven't completely given up on her, just that it feels like I should know where I stand and is happy cheering on the sidelines. Makes me wonder how on earth will I keep my cool once I get to see blondie.
Moving along there's this girl in the team that gives off a radiant smile almost like Erika's. Too bad she's more likely a better dude than me. Why do I keep fancying those hard to reach ones, huh? One thing is for sure, whoever came up with this month's challenge is a genius. 'Cause I'm bound to pass it, or so help me god.
Let's leave it as that. So, that's it for me, see you again next time LJ.
Anyway, it's customary challenge over the internet to not "nut" or shave or whatnot during the month of November. What initially started as two men who like mustaches, transformed into a movement for cancer awareness- No Shave November became such a meme that other movements followed suit like the No Nut one or the No Bra- wherein this case, was originally a day in July but is now moved to October which is well known for observing breast cancer month. Sure I'm skipping a lot of details, but it is what it is.
Now back to me where I gloriously failed either of those. I nutted completely forgetting the challenge, and the tourney that I signed up in. Well, a bench warmer has to warm those benches. kRar. And I shaved just look a bit fresh for my cousins wedding and to please a bit the ever so commentative relatives. There was hardly any piece of struggle as I absently mindedly do the things I shouldn't.
As for the title of this post, well, it's complicated. While I keep spiraling down in despair and delusions for Erika- not her real name, I try to keep myself fresh for the other fishies in the sea. Well, not really? But if there is such a huge opening right? Riiiight? I mean, there should be a pain limit where our poor little heart can take, right? I don't know really. Ever since that "No" or rejection, life turned out like it's some sort of lame survival series where you do mundane stuff just to get by. Everyday events felt like a coping mechanic. I really like Erika but- yes there is a "but", a huge one, but such life circumstances placed a huge wall between us leading to that heart wrenching response.
While I teeter round the stages of grief whether it's 5 or 7, I am somewhere in the Acceptance stage or The Upward Turn stage where much of the anger and despair have calmed down and is leaning to hopeful tomorrow. Or at least I think. I mean, I haven't completely given up on her, just that it feels like I should know where I stand and is happy cheering on the sidelines. Makes me wonder how on earth will I keep my cool once I get to see blondie.
Moving along there's this girl in the team that gives off a radiant smile almost like Erika's. Too bad she's more likely a better dude than me. Why do I keep fancying those hard to reach ones, huh? One thing is for sure, whoever came up with this month's challenge is a genius. 'Cause I'm bound to pass it, or so help me god.
Let's leave it as that. So, that's it for me, see you again next time LJ.