I felt like writing
I dunno why, I just felt like writing in my journal tonight. Maybe it's because I'm bored and alone in my new apartment @ RIT. Maybe it's because I actually thought of something to write about? I dunno exactly. I just felt like I should finally update this.
first, I have updated in a while because there are just things I don't feel like sharing with everyone. I know that goes against the point of having a livejournal, but I just was dealing with some things that if people got ahold of it, it would have gone around to all the wrong people...again...so trying to avoid that, I avoided updating this.
There was something I realized today. It's weird, but i'm used to people coming over to visit me and not me going to visit people. It's just the way it's always been. There doesn't seem to be any particular reason why either. I don't avoid visiting people, it's just they always have wanted to come over to visit me.
It could be that I tend to have a lot of stuff to play and what not (playstation, gamecube, dvds, etc). Maybe it is because I have had a single dorm room for 3 years? But, even before that when I didn't have a single, most of my friends came to my room still to visit. Actually, even back in high school...my friends tended to come over to my house rather than me go to theirs. Although, I did go out to a lot of friends' houses back then, so it wasn't as lopsided.
I only bring this up because I got a new entertainment center this week for the apartment. My roommates, who are all on co-op right now, only had a 13" tv in here and actually would bring out there computer monitor to watch movies in the living room because it was bigger. Maybe I'm measuring my worth by my electronics, I dunno.
Maybe it has to do something with that I always feel like giving and not taking...meaning buying the expensive tv wasn't something just for me...it is for all of us to use when they come back. I have no problem spending money when I know me and others are going to have fun with it. I don't even care about being paid back generally. But, when other people do acts of kindness like that, I find it hard to accept it sometimes. I don't understand why. And usually it depends on the person. Some people I have no problem accepting it. Especially if it is someone where I do something for him then he does something for me...etc.
People say it can be bad to put other people's happiness first, but what if doing so makes me happy in the process? I think this is why I would make a good professor. Well, one of the things that would at least. I know one thing for sure, I never want to leave college. If I'm in classes, teaching or working on campus in some SA position or what not, I don't care...I just don't want to leave.
Which brings me to another thing I've been thinking about. Why is it that I don't want to leave? Am I staying at RIT for my masters because I'm scared of change? Do I not want to move on to another city and school? My feeling is no, that's not true. I generally embrace change. I mean, I just got my job as lab manager and one of the first things I've been working on is changing everything that I can to make sure the labs are better for the students and run more efficiently. While some things may not be huge, the lab assistants will appreciate most of the changes.
When things get stuck in a routine I tend to get bored with things and stop doing them. It's true with livejournal as well. I will check it for a long time, each day, read everyone's posts...etc...and then just one day I will get bored of it until something sparks my interest to go back to it. I have been reading it a lot lately, mostly for a couple people's posts and my daily comics :) But, I got bored of it and haven't read it in the past 3 or 4 days until thesoulless sent me link to one of the comics I have in my feed and it reminded me I haven't read them in a few days. So I came back here and read them. While I was doing that I thought about writing this post.
Well, I can't think of anything else...my train has derailed so I guess I should be off to bed. I have a lot of stuff to do in the apartment before my parents come here this weekend and my friend comes back to RIT...
first, I have updated in a while because there are just things I don't feel like sharing with everyone. I know that goes against the point of having a livejournal, but I just was dealing with some things that if people got ahold of it, it would have gone around to all the wrong people...again...so trying to avoid that, I avoided updating this.
There was something I realized today. It's weird, but i'm used to people coming over to visit me and not me going to visit people. It's just the way it's always been. There doesn't seem to be any particular reason why either. I don't avoid visiting people, it's just they always have wanted to come over to visit me.
It could be that I tend to have a lot of stuff to play and what not (playstation, gamecube, dvds, etc). Maybe it is because I have had a single dorm room for 3 years? But, even before that when I didn't have a single, most of my friends came to my room still to visit. Actually, even back in high school...my friends tended to come over to my house rather than me go to theirs. Although, I did go out to a lot of friends' houses back then, so it wasn't as lopsided.
I only bring this up because I got a new entertainment center this week for the apartment. My roommates, who are all on co-op right now, only had a 13" tv in here and actually would bring out there computer monitor to watch movies in the living room because it was bigger. Maybe I'm measuring my worth by my electronics, I dunno.
Maybe it has to do something with that I always feel like giving and not taking...meaning buying the expensive tv wasn't something just for me...it is for all of us to use when they come back. I have no problem spending money when I know me and others are going to have fun with it. I don't even care about being paid back generally. But, when other people do acts of kindness like that, I find it hard to accept it sometimes. I don't understand why. And usually it depends on the person. Some people I have no problem accepting it. Especially if it is someone where I do something for him then he does something for me...etc.
People say it can be bad to put other people's happiness first, but what if doing so makes me happy in the process? I think this is why I would make a good professor. Well, one of the things that would at least. I know one thing for sure, I never want to leave college. If I'm in classes, teaching or working on campus in some SA position or what not, I don't care...I just don't want to leave.
Which brings me to another thing I've been thinking about. Why is it that I don't want to leave? Am I staying at RIT for my masters because I'm scared of change? Do I not want to move on to another city and school? My feeling is no, that's not true. I generally embrace change. I mean, I just got my job as lab manager and one of the first things I've been working on is changing everything that I can to make sure the labs are better for the students and run more efficiently. While some things may not be huge, the lab assistants will appreciate most of the changes.
When things get stuck in a routine I tend to get bored with things and stop doing them. It's true with livejournal as well. I will check it for a long time, each day, read everyone's posts...etc...and then just one day I will get bored of it until something sparks my interest to go back to it. I have been reading it a lot lately, mostly for a couple people's posts and my daily comics :) But, I got bored of it and haven't read it in the past 3 or 4 days until thesoulless sent me link to one of the comics I have in my feed and it reminded me I haven't read them in a few days. So I came back here and read them. While I was doing that I thought about writing this post.
Well, I can't think of anything else...my train has derailed so I guess I should be off to bed. I have a lot of stuff to do in the apartment before my parents come here this weekend and my friend comes back to RIT...