011. Antisthenes Corollaries - Published in Neo Genesis Daily.
"What did I do now?"
It's Destroyer's favorite comeback, and you can't deny it's a whole verbal discovery. No matter who calls her, be it to politely request a glass of water, be it to inquire the state of the household; she scurries to answer the call and, before the inquirer may ask anything, she's already drawing her line, asking as her eyes go wide and her lower lip wibbles dramatically: "What did I do now?"
It's a brilliant defense; in chess, it'd be a variant of the Scandinavian Defense, aiming to become a Grob-Zilbermints Gambit.
Here, though, I should clarify that Destroyer has always done something: she ironed one of my suits and didn't leave enough intact to make a loincloth out of it, she's taken to herself to start replacing the dishware by systematically destroying it, or she's done away with the horn of one of those hideous porcelain unicorns that have found themselves merrily trotting in the living room. (Mind that I'm not entirely mad at that last one, and I even echo her words when she turns to me and says, with unbelievable cynicism: "Well, the pony still looks pretty, doesn't it, sir?")
The interesting thing about her defense is the structure of it. When she asks "what did I do now?" she's really asking "did you see what I did?" Bizarre absurdities of the servile soul. Destroyer isn't around today; she left, whistling merrily, to visit family somewhere in the depths of Terra. She'll return, if ever, around next week. One hopes she will, otherwise I might be forced to hold interviews and try to find someone who can at least pretend to know what basil and bay leaves are not exchangeable. So here I am, bored and without the prospect of a decent meal, I page the news and look around the city.
What have you done now, Neo Genesis?
--- Superbi Squalo writes a weekly column, Antisthenes Corollaries, for Neo Genesis Daily, as well as contributing with editorial work. Commentary on the column and further discussion boards can be found at his own blog.
It's Destroyer's favorite comeback, and you can't deny it's a whole verbal discovery. No matter who calls her, be it to politely request a glass of water, be it to inquire the state of the household; she scurries to answer the call and, before the inquirer may ask anything, she's already drawing her line, asking as her eyes go wide and her lower lip wibbles dramatically: "What did I do now?"
It's a brilliant defense; in chess, it'd be a variant of the Scandinavian Defense, aiming to become a Grob-Zilbermints Gambit.
Here, though, I should clarify that Destroyer has always done something: she ironed one of my suits and didn't leave enough intact to make a loincloth out of it, she's taken to herself to start replacing the dishware by systematically destroying it, or she's done away with the horn of one of those hideous porcelain unicorns that have found themselves merrily trotting in the living room. (Mind that I'm not entirely mad at that last one, and I even echo her words when she turns to me and says, with unbelievable cynicism: "Well, the pony still looks pretty, doesn't it, sir?")
The interesting thing about her defense is the structure of it. When she asks "what did I do now?" she's really asking "did you see what I did?" Bizarre absurdities of the servile soul. Destroyer isn't around today; she left, whistling merrily, to visit family somewhere in the depths of Terra. She'll return, if ever, around next week. One hopes she will, otherwise I might be forced to hold interviews and try to find someone who can at least pretend to know what basil and bay leaves are not exchangeable. So here I am, bored and without the prospect of a decent meal, I page the news and look around the city.
What have you done now, Neo Genesis?
--- Superbi Squalo writes a weekly column, Antisthenes Corollaries, for Neo Genesis Daily, as well as contributing with editorial work. Commentary on the column and further discussion boards can be found at his own blog.