[THREAD] messing with my MIND, the BUZZING won't stop

[striginae]

Who: Nataku [ soulparadox ] , Nagi [ striginae ] & Genkaku [ hypermonk ] later
Where: Liebert mansion basement
When: Late evening, shortly after this conversation.
Summary: A murder attempt of the well-meaning sort. (Good intentions alone never saved anyone.)
Rating: T

Comments

[striginae]

Too fast. Nataku was speaking too quickly, at least for Nagi to understand past the lingering haze of drugs, and he tried to concentrate on what the other was saying, hoping that this small moment of something almost 'normal' would allow him to maintain his sanity longer. When the fork was offered, he glanced at it weakly, then only shook his head. The action made his head hurt, made the throbbing pain through his temples escalate and spike for a moment, but his nausea was worse. Food was the least of his concern at the moment.

But -- darkness. It was an odd question. Given the way Nataku seemed to operate strictly on logic and reason, a fear of the dark was something of an anomaly. And Nagi thought for a moment, his breathing slow and horase, wondering what to say. (Why was the answer needed so quickly? Was Nataku to be kicked out soon? By Genkaku? -- the thoughts send a shiver down his limbs, but he shook it off, trying to ward off the fear and revulsion, at least for the moment.)

It took him a terribly long while to sort through static-hazed thoughts, to formulate words that would normally take him only a moment. But still, but still, concentrating on this seemingly trivial issue helped to calm his nerves. "A fear of the dark is common in children." Even artificial, his voice was hushed, low, the slightest bit hoarse from shallow breaths, but still, he spoke, eyes half-narrowed in thought. "Most likely because all people fear what they do not know. -- and darkness -- obscures features. Makes it difficult to see. -- One begins to fear that something unknown will emerge from the darkness." Doubling over, he gave a rasping cough before continuing, looking at Nataku. "... perhaps there's something else you're afraid of, and the darkness makes you think that fear will come true."

[soulparadox]

"I made food for nothing." The statement was not spoken in annoyance, but just making sure that he was understanding the situation correctly. At least he would not make food that would not be eaten for awhile. He would not say that it went to waste, because he still remained true in what he had said to Genkaku about coming to feed Nagi. "It is fine."

"I see. I am still a child." This was something that he always told people as though they did not believe that he was one. He was aware of what he was, at least. That he was someone who did not understand the world, still had difficulties in fully understanding how it worked and how to respond to it. But he remained alive to this point. But, that was neither here nor there. Nataku remembered why he was afraid. Alucard had disappeared in the dark and he was left by himself. His head tilted slightly, taking in that memory and finding his answer. "I suppose that I am concerned with the idea that I will be left alone. Without my family."

His gaze had fixed on the man's features, wondering if he would admit to what Rokuro said that he was doing. It was not that he thought that he was clever, merely that now that he was thinking on it, that was what he seemed to be concerned with. An irrational fear and fear of something that was abstract, which made it even more complex to deal with since he worked better with literal concepts. "So how shall I get rid of such a fear?"

[striginae]

Nataku really was rather odd, working on a system of logic that Nagi couldn't completely comprehend -- perhaps it was impossible to comprehend the reasoning when it was entirely unhindered by morals and social inhibitions. It was a vaguely bitter thought, and Nagi couldn't help but narrow his eyes at the untouched bowl of food for a moment. If Nataku were in the care of a more moral guardian, would he be completely different? Would he understand this situation better? (Perhaps, perhaps not. It didn't matter, much. His thoughts were wandering, staggering, stumbling from one subject to the next, unbalanced by the combination of hard drugs and barbiturates that had been flooded into his veins.)

Another long moment of thought, and he flexed his fingers, trying to piece together his mind during this moment of calm, where he could concentrate on something, anything. "... fears of abstract concepts are difficult to eradicate, if not impossible, at least by logical means." A small sigh, as he took in a low breath, trying to calm shallow breaths. "Perhaps it would be best to face your fear of loneliness."

There was the weak beginning of a laugh, rasping and hollow -- Nataku. He didn't belong here. Not with the others here. And Nagi sounded almost bitter for a moment. (Wishing that these circumstances were different.) "... speak to those people you hold close. Explain to them what you fear. -- and if they may leave, follow them. If you do not wish to lose someone precious, then you must also make the effort to keep them."

[soulparadox]

"I see." He nodded once, would do just as he was instructed to do. It also seemed like Nagi understood the reasons that he would kill him. That it was just trying to make sure that Genkaku stayed tethered to their family. "The ways that I have been going about curing myself were inadequate. These should be better." Small hand motion to the cart where a flashlight was resting.

The bowl of food was picked up as he went to set it back on the dining cart. "I understand. I will make sure that they will not get too far from me. I thank you for helping me, at least a little bit." It seemed like he would push the cart back out of the room, but he only moved it so that it would be out of the way. Not certain how much scrambling would take place and not wanting to make any more of a mess than he already would make.

"Now for the reason that I am here." It was not so much that the tone of his voice changed, since it barely ever changed, but that the expression shifted from its usual blankness to mild anger. "I said that you would be an inconvenience if you became a corpse. This is true. But only if someone was not immediately here to clean it up." His hand rose to float harmlessly in the air. "I remember … when you bleed … you can cause pain to me. Correct?"

His head tilted slightly as he decided that he should ask. Since he had been working on the belief that Nagi would benefit from this as well, but he may be wrong. If he was not going to profit from his own death, then Nataku would simply strike him from the list of those that would be happy. "Do you wish to be free? That would make you happy, correct?"

[striginae]

Then, Nataku had been suffering from this fear for some time? Under normal circumstances, Nagi would have been curious about this -- something must have unsettled the boy, to derail him from his strictly logical train of thought and plant such an irrational (and inherently human) fear in him. Would have inquired as to whether something had happened, whether he'd lost something, perhaps, or whether he'd been hurt? All valid questions, and they may have helped Nataku with his own fears.

But no -- now wasn't the time for it. The realization came several moments too slow, delayed by the sluggish flow of drugs in his veins, but even past the lockdown on his mental processes, Nagi could tell that Nataku was -- angry. At him? The question asked soon afters -- 'but only if someone was not immediately here to clean it up' -- only supplemented that suggestion, and for a moment, Nagi felt a sharp pang of fear prickle down his back. (-- why?)

His limbs felt like they were made of led, his framed wracked by uncontrolled tremors and twitches -- but still, he dragged himself away from the other a scant inch, pale eyes fixed in a wary (disbelieving) stare. "-- you plan on freeing me?" His voice had gone quiet, partly from the effort of forcing himself to move, but also partly from the unwillingness to believe that Nataku might be trying to dispose of him. That -- was the only logical conclusion that could be drawn from those words, wasn't it? (Maybe. Maybe he was missing something. Maybe he was making a mistake, maybe the drugs were impairing his judgment, maybe Genkaku's constant tormenting was getting to him, no, Nataku wouldn't be the type to commit murder for not good reason. -- reason.) A shuddering breath out. "What -- are you planning on doing?"

[soulparadox]

"It is a play on words." Nataku admitted. Still did not appear too apologetic that he seemed as though he was lying to Nagi. However, he felt that he should explain his reasons, since it seemed like he was being asked them. "Genkaku will remain tormented by you. Whether you are present or not. The fact that you are alive brings him sorrow, because you will not love him." His gaze went back to the iron door, thinking of his elder brother. Not that he would come in and be angry with him, but how much he was suffering.

"I no longer feel like asking if you would be so kind as to love him back." His head tilted. "It is not that you are not kind, but that you are both human. Both emotional and illogical. If you admitted that you loved him, Genkaku would be happy and perhaps release you from here." This was how he understood how things would work if such simple words were spoken. Spoken and be true, of course. His gaze remained on the door as his ribbon continued to rise in the air. Perhaps, trying to be intimidating. "But because you do not … you continue to drive him farther and farther away from us."

Pulling his gaze away from the door, he stared at the other for a time. Not as angry as before but actually seemingly worried, scared. "I wonder if you are the metaphorical darkness." He waited a few seconds for a response before taking a tighter grip on the ribbon. The reaction was instantaneous; the ends lashing out to wrap around Nagi's delicate neck - to rise him up and against the wall so that he would be slowly strangled to death. He thought about simply beheading him, but that seemed like it was too kind. Or perhaps, he wanted the man to realize that he had done something wrong and admit to it before his eventual death.

[striginae]

How -- why? (This wasn't supposed to be what happened.) Throughout Nataku's calm explanation, Nagi could only listen in stunned silence, unwilling to believe what the other was saying. (Then again, maybe, maybe, he should have foreseen this, in some convoluted way. Nataku, logically, would love his family, and perhaps would see any that opposed the will of his 'family members' would be seen as an enemy? Was that it? But then -- what of previous actions? Were those simply routine, meaningless movements that were done for the sake of performance? Was this his true intention?)

Breath catching in his throat, Nagi made to speak, but found that he couldn't. "-- no, Nataku -- I --" The sudden realization that he was in very real danger sent a spike of adrenaline rushing through his system, clashing with the drugs that numbed his senses, and he dragged himself backwards, back pressed against the cold concrete wall, shivering -- trying desperately to free himself from the tight coil of prayer beads. (Ah, what would Genkaku think? -- was the vague thought at the back of his mind. Maybe he would regret this. If I were to die here, because I could not fight back.) "Please don't --"

The thought was torn out of his head the next moment, when the ribbon wrapped about his throat, then jerked him upwards, instantly cutting off air. The artificial voice-box pressed against his windpipe, and he gasped for air, tied arms rising to grapple with the ribbon in a futile attempt to escape. And past the faint strangled noise that escaped his throat, he could barely whisper, "-- I wouldn't -- have thought you the type -- to think like this." A shudder, a gasp -- his vision was blurring. (Of everything, this was not how I imagined I would die.)

[soulparadox]

"I would not have thought like this as well." Nataku felt better that Nagi was being strangled. It meant that in a little bit, one of the factors that would try to ruin the happy family. Perhaps, the fear of the dark would disappear as well. The man had said that fears like his would not be able to be dissolved by logical means, but it seemed like this would help. And murder was logical, was it not? "My plan was that I was going to withhold food from you until you admitted that you loved Genkaku." Brief glance over his shoulder to the food. "It seems like that that would not have worked any way. I wonder if you were aware of my plan."

"However, someone told me about your true nature. That you are actually a liar. That you are actually trying to drive my brother away from us." His tugged his ribbon slightly - which caused him to pull Nagi away from the wall, about to set his feet back on the ground, before slamming him back into the stone. He was not happy to be fooled. "If Genkaku is not here, who will protect Johan?" Nataku would do his best to look after the Senator, but that was not his job. That was not his part in the family.

"I do not wish for you to lie anymore." He looked down for a moment, but his hold on the ribbon remained sure. "Were you lying before about how to help me with my problem?" Even as he much he wanted an answer; the ribbon began to tighten around Nagi's throat. Reflecting the anger that the child did not quite comprehend. Was unsure why he was upset about lying. Because he saw that it caused harm to his brother? Or because he saw no reason in it? Difficult to say, perhaps it would think on it later afterward.

[striginae]

(Aah, no, no -- why did things have to progress in this fashion?) His thoughts were rapidly deteriorating to a disjointed series of desperate observations, hoping, praying, that there was some way to escape from this execution. Fingers tangled furiously with the ribbon, attempting to tear is away, but accomplished nothing except the tear of skin, and blood began to stain the length of the ribbon. Not that it mattered much, and Nagi felt his muscles twitch, the lack of air starting to shut down his system. Could he spare any breath to speak?

"-- who? --" (Someone who hated him? -- perhaps Genkaku? In a cruel move, toying with him more, laughing at this scene from behind the curtains? -- no, unlikely. Then who? -- someone from the labs?) Whatever fragmented thoughts he'd been trying to formulate, however, were instantly obliterated, when he was slammed against the concrete surface. The blow effectively drove every last breath of air out of his lungs, and he cringed, his head ringing from the shock. Blood trickling down from his temples where the skin had been torn off, rivulets of opera scarlet leaking into the edge of his vision, painting everything bright.

(-- perhaps. Perhaps. This is for the best. Maybe this is the only way I can escape his torment.) His attempts to tear away from the ribbon had weakened, then stopped, fingers grasping only loosely at the folds of blood-stained cloth. The gaze he had fixed on Nataku had long since been drained of the desperate pleading (-- please don't do this --), replaced by something close to half-conscious defeat.

[hypermonk]

I would like you to stay in your room. I am going to be giving dinner to Nagi along with have a brief conversation - etc etc was the first notice Genkaku had received that day on his door. Fingers yanked down the piece of paper and the monk took a glance at it quizzically, letting his violet hues gaze over the words and the name signed at the bottom. He knew that was fucking bad news, and Nataku was starting to grate his nerves. The clone was irritating, and a piece of shit - shoulda given him salvation, even if the cute little shit didn’t deserve it.

The monk journeyed back into his room, awakening from his sleep and took his beloved flying V. He wasn’t gonna let some little fucker destroy everything that Genkaku had completed, if Nataku was gonna screw everything up, then the little fly was gonna get the worse torturous death that anyone could ask for. Totally beautiful blissful death. With the guitar slung over his shoulder, the monk made his way to the estate’s basement, taking in slow steps, and with each step the corner of his lips pulled upwards.

A large clack emerged from within the large blood-scented room as the metal door slid open, and sluggish movements were to follow. His eyes at first gazed to Nagi and his delirium-induced state, the drugs that crawled through veins and constricted around that pretty little head could only made a small amused sound emerge from the base of Genkaku’s throat - but when the monk’s head tilted to Nataku, he cocked his head and rubbed the back of his neck, tossing the guitar to the concrete ground and took slow steps, "Hmmm, you’re getting on my nerves, little bro."

[soulparadox]

"Rokuro." The person in question had told him to only keep it secret from Genkaku; he did not say that Nataku could not tell Nagi who it was. He watched at Nagi tried to pull at the ribbon, and he was a little worried about the blood. Wondering if he should take a few steps back so that he would not be hurt by it. His stare returned to the man's face, thinking that he was not so scary. If someone like this could be disposed of so easily, then he should not have to be afraid of the dark. "That seems logical." He mused aloud.

Nataku flinched when the door opened. Did not have enough time to drop Nagi to the floor and act as though he had not been trying to strangle the life out of him; that he was just present so that he would give food to the man and prepare to kill him on the next visit. Instead, he stayed as he was with something close to a guilty expression on his face. Head tilted slightly to the ground with his gaze up to Genkaku. He had been thinking that he had more time to kill him than this. Looked briefly at the guitar that was set down before seemingly relieved that it was set down on the ground; that he would not be shot at with it.

"On your nerves? I am nowhere near you." Nataku corrected Genkaku's speech, not realizing that he was making his own situation worse by doing so. He just did not wish for his brother to be speaking incorrectly. "I know that you may be upset that I am strangling Nagi, but I cannot stop what I am doing. If you would wait outside for a few moments, I will be finished. Is that acceptable?" With his free hand, he gestured to the hall. Knowing that he probably would be told to leave and that he should not order his brother around; he thought that he should at least try.

Nataku was doing all of this for him, after all.

[striginae]

Rokuro. Rokuro. Even as his thoughts shattered, fragmented, it still made sense, and for a moment, the fingers of his one hand tore desperately at the ribbon once more. (Yes, Rokuro would do this. -- the traitor. A lying coward, most likely wanting him out of the picture as revenge for past? -- that single clash they'd been through? Was that it?) And the anger swelled up heavy in his chest, coiling around his heart and slowly squeezes, making him writhe, his shoulders shaking as he tangled weakly with the ribbon. (Or perhaps, perhaps, it wasn't the anger that was making him spasm and twitch. Nothing that grand. It was simply the fact that he was being strangled, and in a few long moment, he'd be dead and gone. Simple as that.)

Spots of black marred his already-blurred vision, and he heard, rather than saw, Genkaku enter, flinching at the slam of the iron door rebounding against the wall. It was suddenly and painfully cold, and he shivered, head rolling back to gaze weakly at Genkaku -- meeting the other's leering stare for a brief moment. And during that second, he was utterly torn. (Death, here and now, at this child's hands -- or continuous torment at the hands of this monster? A path of needles or a path of knives. Which would you have me choose? Which would you condemn me too? He came terribly, terribly close to asking for help, for the briefest moment, before restraining himself.)

His lungs already purged of air, Nagi could no longer speak, barely choking out a faint strangled noise past lips wet with saliva -- and he shook his head weakly, eyes closed. Waiting for the conclusion to this tragicomedy one way or the other.

[hypermonk]

Casting a leering glare at Nataku, the monk gave the child-like clone a moronic look, one that clearly spoke silently of Nataku’s dysfunctional mentally, and how that was doing nothing but pissing him off - and that Nataku just couldn’t understand that every word he spoke, every little murmur and every little movement that he did, that Genkaku was contemplating on about five way in breaking in that childish skull. His movements were languid as he made his way to Nataku, and violet optics glanced at Nagi: Heh...gonna beg now? spoke the creases of the monk’s lips, tilting upwards to see Nagi in that pathetic state. Shit, that monster within the other’s head could have ripped Nataku to shreds, but he had to do the good thing and let himself die - how it made Genkaku snort.

"Nah. Little brother--" He uttered violently as fingers slipped into his pocket and emerged from a thin cigar lodged between slender fingers, "--You don’t get it, don’tcha?" The cigar was placed between his lips and the monk tossed his head back, red strands over his shoulder as the cigar emitted a swirling of toxic smoke. He lifted the cigar from his mouth, pointing it at Nataku, "Ain’t you ever gonna get it? Not gonna get that Nagi isn’t yours to play with?" He scratched the side of his head, "Huh...gotta say, wonder why fuckin’ Johan puts up with you."

"Hey--" He muttered abruptly, taking the end of the cigar and putting it out on Nataku’s neck, charring the other’s flesh, "If you wanna play, could’ve just asked..." Though, the next maneuver that the monk committed wasn’t playful at all. the occupied hand grasped at the back of Nataku’s skull - the grip hard, harsh and violet, dangerous and brutal as he yanked Nataku from Genkaku’s prized vermin. Then, with one strong and powerful jerking of his arm, Genkaku hurled the boy’s skull to collide with the wall, and harshly whispered with a raspy tone, "...Tch. don’t know when to back off."

[soulparadox]

"I am not playing with Nagi. I am-" He automatically flinched when the cigar came close to his neck, wanted to move out of the way as he was certain where it would go. Unable to do so in time or raise a hand against Genkaku so to get him to stop; unlike when his eye was taken, he let out a harsh yelp and fell down onto the floor to hold his neck. The reason that this hurt more than his eye was that it was his elder brother. It always hurt when his brother brought injury to him. One that he could not easily ignore, because he actually cared about this person. It meant that he was being paid attention to, but he did not like what else it meant.

The ribbon was released when he went to hold his neck, which allowed Nagi to be free. His eyes widened for a moment as he released the hold on the burnt skin so that he could look up at the monk, trying his best to appear apologetic. "I always ask if I could play with you…" His voice was quiet and small, but still spoken with the blandness that it always was. Nataku wondered if he was going to crawl towards Nagi to try to finish the job before the man could get a breath in - was not too far away from him, or if he should quietly leave the room. Neither choice was taken as the back of his head was grabbed while he was quietly debating his two options.

Did not have time to ask if he could be released by Genkaku before his skull collided with the wall. Crumbling against the stone, he thought that he heard something break when he hit the wall. His eyes closed in a moment of pain as he felt nauseous, confused as to why. Instead of going to baby his head, he went to his ears. Looking around for the ringing, confused as to where it was. Blood started to curl down from the initial wound, which he expected, but he became concerned that his ears and eyes appeared to be bleeding as well. Sat at he was as he touched his face, smearing the blood in the process of his confusion as he was trying to figure out what was wrong with him.

"Big brother, big brother." He kept muttering, wondering why it hurt when he touched his face, but unable to word it properly. Just kept calling to Genkaku and quietly touching his injuries, staring at the blood in confusion, before he eventually lost consciousness.

[striginae]

The faint hiss of burning flesh, the murmur of words, both violent and bland, and the rustle of movement -- Nagi was only faintly aware of these, too close to losing consciousness to realize what was happening, and hovered at the brink of oblivion -- until the ribbon around his throat suddenly released his grip. The impact with the ground jarred him through the bone, pain flickering through the half-healed fractures in his ribs, and he gasped for breath, choking on a lungful of air. And for a moment, he managed to rise on all fours before his limbs gave way once more, and collapsed to the ground, coughing, choking, gagging, trying, trying to catch his breathe.

And his lungs were still writhing, his breath coming in staggered gasps, when the sudden crunch of bone tore through the air. A sickening noise, accompanied by the slick of blood and the quiet mutter of incoherent words. "-- Nataku." Ironic, really, that he should worry for the person who had been so intent on killing him until a moment ago. But all he could think -- it wasn't the child's fault. And despite the dark whispers at the back of his mind -- he deserves to die, why shouldn't he die? -- he couldn't help but stare at Nataku, at the blood pouring from his face, the fumbling drag of fingers through the trickles of red, then the staggering collapse. -- dead?

"-- how could you --" A low hiss of words, ragged with hoarse breaths, but still sharp and vicious -- and Nagi fixed a venomous stare on Genkaku, shoulders heaving with each stuttering breath, but his words still determined. "It wasn't -- his fault. Rokuro. -- you would be wise to watch -- your lackeys better." It was meaningless, most likely would achieve nothing. But still, but still -- tearing his eyes away from Genkaku, he looked to Nataku, hoping, praying, that the other was still alive. (Please don't let another person I know to perish at the hands of this monster.)

[hypermonk]

The contact of bone against the stone wall emitted a satisfying crack that made the monk’s lips twitch - the squishy sound of organs swirling around in that thin skull and the thunk of a limp body hitting ground with eyes rolling around the back of his skull was nothing but a form of amusement for the monk. Genkaku watched the actions like a sideshow and took a step back, the murmuring words of pseudo-siblings made Genkaku snort mockingly as the tip of his shoe nudged at the body, tilting the child’s head upwards so the splash of red was pulley visible to his eyes. It was pretty damn tempting, how the monk’s mind just wanted to stomp that disgusting mouth and dig his fingers into the soft wounded flesh and pierce brains.

Then, the words of his obsession pulled him from the violent frenzy that traversed through his head - hand still grasping onto the broken skull released and blood trickled down his fingers, wet and slick with Nataku’s blood. Bloodied appendages made their way to Nagi’s darkened hair, needling through damp locks and the monk crouched down, his lips pulled back into a feral sneer as eyes half-lidded gazed over that beautiful chaotic mess. "Hey, didn’t I fuckin’ tell you to be good?" Genkaku murmured violently as his hand tightened around the other’s locks, yanking Nagi’s head back painfully. "Rokuro eh?" A soft dark chuckle.

"Damn...thought the kid was pretty smart." Genkaku harshly maneuvered Nagi’s body until the other was settled against the wall, and Genkaku with his wolfish movements closing their proximity. Really, was Rokuro really that moronic to do something like that? Shit, Genkaku had to admit, the kid was losing brain cells, and the monk would have to do something about that. "Guess I just gotta punish that brat for messin’ with my carnage ya’know?" He breathed against Nagi’s mouth.