Balls to Birmingham
Adventures in Birmingham, continued. (Yes, it is possible to have adventures in Birmingham, I tell you. A bit, anyway.)
In Birmingham, you can buy animals as a kit of parts. Glue them together in the comfort of your own home!
Some of my readers might recall Andi Sex Gang reciting a poem to a pig's head at the Whitby Goth Weekend a few years back. I remember the fuss that caused - the way people carried on, you'd think that Andi had broken into a pig sanctuary and killed the pig himself. Some seemed to assume he'd done something illegal.
In fact, you can buy pig's heads from specialist big-chunk-of-dead-animal butchers like those in Birmingham. They're not even expensive - just a few quid. There's not much actual meat on a pig's head, after all. But if you leave the eyes in, it'll see you through the week.
I'll get me coat.
Another delicacy from Birmingham - chicken feet. I have no idea how you'd cook them. But a great bulk buy option for all you voodoo practitioners out there.
Disconcerting though it may seem at first glance, I do rather like the way Birmingham's butchers put it all up front (and I speak as a vegetarian here). It's a very honest way of selling meat. All those people who freaked out at Andi Sex Gang had probably never seen meat that wasn't shrink-wrapped.
And now we come - with a certain relief - to the veg section. Here's a stall selling veg in the now almost universal 'paaaahnd a bowl' manner.
But I reckon you get a lot more for your paaaahnd in Birmingham than you do in London. Look at that veg - heaped up in great piles! In London you're lucky if it peeks over the rim.
More Brum nosh this way...
Not just any old doner kebab, but *German* doner kebab. So much more efficient than those old Turkish versions.
And, as Fangs On Fur would say, balls. To be exact, camel balls.
I wonder if the guys at the butcher's shop could supply me with a camel toe?
In Birmingham, you can buy animals as a kit of parts. Glue them together in the comfort of your own home!
Some of my readers might recall Andi Sex Gang reciting a poem to a pig's head at the Whitby Goth Weekend a few years back. I remember the fuss that caused - the way people carried on, you'd think that Andi had broken into a pig sanctuary and killed the pig himself. Some seemed to assume he'd done something illegal.
In fact, you can buy pig's heads from specialist big-chunk-of-dead-animal butchers like those in Birmingham. They're not even expensive - just a few quid. There's not much actual meat on a pig's head, after all. But if you leave the eyes in, it'll see you through the week.
I'll get me coat.
Another delicacy from Birmingham - chicken feet. I have no idea how you'd cook them. But a great bulk buy option for all you voodoo practitioners out there.
Disconcerting though it may seem at first glance, I do rather like the way Birmingham's butchers put it all up front (and I speak as a vegetarian here). It's a very honest way of selling meat. All those people who freaked out at Andi Sex Gang had probably never seen meat that wasn't shrink-wrapped.
And now we come - with a certain relief - to the veg section. Here's a stall selling veg in the now almost universal 'paaaahnd a bowl' manner.
But I reckon you get a lot more for your paaaahnd in Birmingham than you do in London. Look at that veg - heaped up in great piles! In London you're lucky if it peeks over the rim.
More Brum nosh this way...
Not just any old doner kebab, but *German* doner kebab. So much more efficient than those old Turkish versions.
And, as Fangs On Fur would say, balls. To be exact, camel balls.
I wonder if the guys at the butcher's shop could supply me with a camel toe?