your self-esteem moment for the day
your self-esteem moment for the day
pictures are slowly trickling in
from the November party
celebrating October's Halloween
I went as Pippi Longstocking, a
conceit most of my friends understood
and appreciated
but which most of the guests
did not quite understand
there were odd moments of solidarity
such as when one of the hosts'
former employers
showed up as Dorothy, braids and all
and he and I stood on the iced porch
in winter
and sneered at everyone in their heavy cloaks
and their heavier costumes
(you have to be butch
to stand outside in a dress
at midnight on November 3rd)
but it was one of those shocking moments
when the pictures came back
and I started catching glimpses of myself
I have an inner picture
that pretty much matches the outside one
but there are slight differences
which are always brought sharply to bear
when I see myself
they say the camera puts on ten pounds
well, my goodness, with me
you'd never notice
so here
here I am
fat bearded polyamorous heathen wench
bisexual, hormonal and deranged
four hundred pounds and counting
three chins now and aggressive about it
committed to the concept
of providing the bad example
and you thought you had problems
--27 january 2003