welcome to your seasonal rant
Okay, this will be a rant, and it will likely be perceived as a rant against Christianity, and I am more than willing to engage in debate afterwards--but I just have to say this, because damn, it needs to be said.
From The Trumpet comes this wonderful little gem:
Don't Even Think About It
From the January 2011 Trumpet Print Edition
The wretched world of werewolves, vampires and zombies
By Joel Hilliker
Think positive. This world is ugly--but don't become a cynic or a brooder. That's brilliant advice from one of history's spiritual giants, the Apostle Paul. "Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is gracious, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things," he wrote (Philippians 4:8; Revised Standard Version). It's one of the most helpful admonitions in Scripture about maintaining mental and spiritual health.
First, Paul was a raving bastard, a lunatic with an anti-gay, anti-woman agenda who was quite possibly homosexual himself; and I'm not saying that as a slam to him, I'm saying that from a reader of historical documents of the time. He doesn't come off as a 'spiritual giant', he comes off as a small, misanthropic, petty-minded blackmailer who twisted fundamentally what could have been an accepting, loving religion into the hate-filled, contradictory insanity it frequently is today.
The quote cited plays out remarkably accurately across several versions, but came at the end of a lengthy letter to the saved churchmen in Philippi, a town which was still torn between pagan and Christian ways. When this was originally written, Paul was most likely awaiting trial in Rome, and had sent this by messenger. Thus, it was in his best interests to laud and praise the Philippians, for hosting him earlier, feeding him well, and caring for him obsequiously in all ways.
I'm not saying that the letter, taken separately from his origins, is not among the most beautiful words ever put down in the Bible. They are strong, and paternal; they come across as the wise just father speaking to his beloved household. But paired with my understanding of the historical base of things, they're an orator's sham, sent solely to drum up support for him during his hour of need, as well as fostering acceptance of the rising Christian faith. And make no bones about it--he is speaking to the Philippian men without question, as well as speaking clearly to those saved souls numbering in the 140,000 that would go to heaven (presumedly leaving everyone else, including all women, in whatever occasionally revised place of damnation that was dreamt up).
Take a glance around, and you see a world dead set on thinking the polar opposite. Whatever is foul or crooked, whatever is unjust and impure, whatever is grotesque, whatever is hateful, if there is any degeneracy, anything barbaric and evil, anything worthy of condemnation, that is what people tend to think on.
The other night, after putting the kids to bed, I turned on the television. I walked to an adjoining room, which put the remote out of reach. Suddenly--at the same time one of my daughters emerged from her bedroom asking for a glass of water--an ad came on that showed four grotesque murders in about 10 seconds. "Do not look at the television!" I said, scrambling for the remote.
I have several problems with this. One: he had put his children to bed. Therefore, they shouldn't have gotten up; it was their lookout. But two: if he was that insanely concerned, then he needs to either stop watching television, or turn it off when he leaves the room. This is a no-brainer. This is stress for no reason. Plus, three--saying that? To any child? Virtually ENSURES they will look at the television! What is he, five?
This repulsive nightmare was meant to attract viewers to an upcoming program. Shows about bizarre, deviant acts and morbidly violent crimes dominate the airwaves.
That schlock fittingly symbolizes the terminal condition of our culture. As this sick world rots, people are increasingly fascinated with all things dead-and undead.
You’ve heard of Twilight, the series of books and movies about a love affair between a glamorous vampire and a gorgeous woman he must protect from a hunky werewolf. The books have sold over 100 million copies and been translated into 38 languages; the three films have raked in over $2 billion. "Box office gross" indeed.
To be fair, I can't stand Twilight, or any manifestation of it. I think it's crap writing, and I think it's a horrific tragedy that it's so popular. This speaks ill of both our level of education in this country and our level of critical thinking. It makes me sad.
But again, the outrage and the ire--come on, this is just a culture sitting around playing what-if! According to several Biblical accounts, the 'better times' of the ancient past actually featured zombies and demons! Plus an astounding lack of refrigeration. Trust me, it's better these days.
Adding in popular TV shows like HBO's True Blood and the CW Network's The Vampire Diaries, all told, vampire entertainment is now a $7 billion industry and growing. It's a world of glamor, romance and sex mingled with blood, violence and occultism. Millions of minds are marinating in this lurid material. Harmless escapism, most people say. I disagree. But no one can argue that in some few, it's having truly bizarre effects.
This is again where I say he's wrong. I say people have always done these aberrant things. Haitian zombies. The Salem Witch Trials. The Inquisition. The Crusades. And there are endless other examples.
I think what we're facing now is threefold:
1. There are more people now.
2. There is more connection now.
3. Word gets out faster.
Pair more people with more open channels of communication with faster speed of transmission, and what do you get? A world in which nearly everything that can be televised, aired, cabled, discussed, written about, read aloud, filmed, videoed, recorded, passed on, rumored, painted, sculpted, coded, or spoken, WILL BE. This is not new--just the methods of transmission and translation are.
A subculture of people who consider themselves real vampires is taking root and spreading. Joseph Laycock, author of Vampires Today: The Truth About Modern Vampirism, says these wackos either consume blood or believe they absorb life energy from people around them-and most think their physical, mental and emotional health will fade if they don't feed. Somebody please slap them.
Only if we get the right to slap Joel right back. Fair's fair.
Stupid teenagers are reportedly biting each other and licking or sucking each other"s blood. "These are kids who think they are real vampires," Dr. Orly Avitzur of the Consumers Union told an MSNBC reporter. One teen wrote on a vampire-themed website, "Having that thick, warm copper-tasting blood in my mouth is the best thing I can think of! Sometimes my boyfriend lets me feed off him. I let him feed off me as well."
Again, for the uninitiated: This is blood fetishism, not real vampirism. This is teens getting off on the shock value. This is life for the under-23 set. Kids are stupid. It happens. Some kids are too stupid, and get sick or die. This is called culling the herd. That also happens.
This passes for a hobby these days? Aside from it being sick, painful and disgusting, health officials say these kids are asking for nasty, even dangerous infections, and are liable to give each other blood-borne diseases like hepatitis and HIV. C'mon folks. Do you really have to be told not to do this?
And I really have to break down this paragraph. First: it's sick, painful and disgusting only to Joel, not to everyone. Second: Blood-borne diseases can only be spread if someone already has that disease, so if you're a teen with HIV, and you're offering your blood to be sucked, YOU have the problem here, not the person sucking on you. While yes, I would adore teachers with actual intelligence telling people it's not an automatic death sentence, but generally speaking, it's not the best idea without trust, understanding and good medical screening beforehand, I know that's not going to happen.
It was about this point, reading through this, that I started snickering out loud. "If there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things"--so much for that, Joel. You're luridly churning up the muck of your oft-cited degradation right along with us.
Another mind-boggling trend coming to an urban center near you is zombie walking. It started in California nine years ago and has spread, virus-like, to cities across America, Britain and Australia. Feeding off a booming film and television trend, multitudes-sometimes thousands strong-dress up like ghoulish reanimated corpses, spattered with blood, for a few hours of public moaning and foot-dragging, pretending to be on the hunt for human flesh. Parents bring their children and make it a family affair, and police close streets and provide escort.
He really is nuts. He's almost referring to this as a cult. A zombie cult. The true tragedy is, I think he's serious.
There is an explanation for all this nonsense. These modern amusements actually have evil roots that go back millennia.
God has seen it all. He knows the way to happiness. He is full of joy; He is love (Psalm 16:11; 1 John 4:8). He is light, and there is no hint of darkness in Him (1 John 1:5). He doesn't find wickedness the least entertaining, and He doesn't dismiss evil as harmless fun (e.g. Psalm 11:5; Proverbs 14:9).
From the Bible in Basic English: You will make clear to me the way of life; where you are joy is complete; in your right hand there are pleasures for ever and ever. I'm not saying that this is a bad concept, it's not. But it was, first and foremost, a prayer by David--I believe before he became King--to his God; a typical prayer that all things are made right by God, all things are blessed by God, all protection and safety come from God.
From the Complete Jewish Bible: Those who do not love, do not know God; because God is love. This is also pretty basic: if you do not understand love, in all its variety, you do not understand God. Which is fine as far as it goes, but Joel needs to know it goes a lot farther. If God is Love, in all its aspects, then God is groovy with the platonic love of nuns in church as well as the fellow who chains his wife in the basement and whips her until she squeals. If God is Love, in all aspects, then he's down with all things that lead to a happy heart.
ALL. THINGS. Which takes in quite a large part of this article--especially the things Joel is so outraged about.
From Douay-Rheims' Bible: And this is the declaration which we have heard from him and declare unto you: That God is light and in him there is no darkness. I think this is about the best translation found on the fly--a lot of Bibles use variants on some of the wording; this one remains pretty clear. But it's also obtuse, looked at another way, because earlier in the Bible it's said that God is all things, dark and light, bad and good--but now John says oh no, you didn't understand properly, God is light and GOOD and you really need to GET that.
Of course, John was something of a raving lunatic as well, so...
As far as Psalm 11:5, that one goes all over the place. Examples:
The Bible in Basic English: The Lord puts the upright and the sinner to the test, but he has hate in his soul for the lover of violent acts.
The Complete Jewish Bible: Adonai tests the righteous; but he hates the wicked and the lover of violence.
The Holman Christian Standard: The Lord examines the righteous and the wicked. He hates the lover of violence.
New Century Bible: The Lord tests those who do right, but he hates the wicked and those who love to hurt others.
So, in brief (not possible at this point): God hates. That's a bad thing, right there. But pushing past that--the basic gist seems to be that God will judge everyone, the wicked and the pure alike, but those who commit violent acts, God will not be kind with. Because God hates violence.
Which, y'know, considering this is the guy who spent most of the Old Testament randomly killing people, is hypocrisy on a truly grand scale, but even if we don't go there, wau, this puts Christians who shoot abortion doctors in a bad light, doesn't it? I mean, forget the guys behind 9/11; God's out to take down every man who hits a woman, hits a child. Every person who fights in a bar. Every soldier. Everyone who gets angry and strikes out.
How is any of that, though, "doesn't find wickedness the least entertaining"?
Which brings us to Proverbs 14:9:
The Bible in Basic English again: In the tents of those hating authority there is error, but in the house of the upright man there is grace.
Douay-Rheims: A fool will laugh at sin, but among the just grace shall abide.
The Good News translation: Foolish people don't care if they sin, but good people want to be forgiven.
Wau, is there variety on this one. If we back up to that whole Psalm, we see it's pretty much a series of either/or, yes/no statements. (It also contains one of my favorite lines in the entire Bible, Psalm 14:13, Even in laughter the heart may ache, and joy may end in grief.) But even if we're taking that one--extremely variably translated--line out of context from the rest of the psalm--it still doesn't mean what Joel thinks it means.
God forbids us to consume blood (e.g. Leviticus 17:10; Acts 15:20), or to practice occultism and witchcraft, with which it is often paired, as in vampire lore (Leviticus 19:26).
Point the first. Leviticus, entirely, was a book for Israel's priests, so they would know and remember the special adherences for God's chosen worship. It wasn't intended for lay people, ever.
But okay, say you don't buy that. Say you say Leviticus is part of the entire Bible. Then let me hit you with the actual verse from the Complete Jewish Bible:
When someone from the community of Isra'el or one of the foreigners living with you eats any kind of blood, I will set myself against that person who eats blood and cut him off from his people.
That? That right there? Says to me "Vampires: don't drink blood in Israel. I don't like it. Jews: you're my people. Don't drink blood, period."
Fine. Makes sense to me. God's a jealous god, fine, he doesn't like people drinking blood, because the blood is the life and he's still all crazy that we're going to end up immortal and challenge him, or something...and that's fine, he's allowed to be crazed on this issue. How'ver, that still doesn't mean everyone, everywhere, is banned from the practice. Just Jewish priests. Or, if you really want to extend it. Jews, priests, and Israelites, whether Jewish or not.
Everyone else? Off the hook. Get over yourself, Joel.
Acts is even worse. This is from the Bible in Basic English:
But that we give them orders to keep themselves from things offered to false gods, and from the evil desires of the body, and from the flesh of animals put to death in ways against the law, and from blood.
This was a direct challenge to other priests in the area. Point one: God's priests are telling people that eating of things sacrificed to other gods is wrong; not just that other gods are wrong, but that any food sacrificed to that god or gods, or shared with the congregation in ceremony to other gods, was somehow evil or wrong. This is religious double-talk, equal in all ways with "Oh, Mithras? Yeah, we call him Jesus. We worship on the same day just like you do."
Second, the other religions in the area featured holy prostitutes, and priests who were anything but chaste. This was another way to markedly separate from the other religions--saying that your god said their god asked them to do bad things. The strangling thing is hardly an issue now, and that's assuming everyday people know exactly how their food animals came to the table--most people don't.
And if you go back to the whole passage of Acts that comes from? It's all a dodge for Paul to get around getting circumcised, because he was being a big baby about it. How is that passage relevant to anything in the rest of this article?!?
He is a God of life. "[T]o be carnally minded is death; but to be spiritually minded is life and peace" (Romans 8:6). In ancient priestly law, God forbade even touching a dead body. "I have set before you life and death," He says in Deuteronomy 30:19--"therefore choose life, that both thou and thy seed may live."
Brother. Not even touching the dead? First, that establishes a dangerous disconnection with the fact that we are born, we die, we live in between--the signs of which pervade Western societies, in sad and sometimes tragically bizarre ways.
But second, the Deuteronomy passage is nothing about sex--it's "carnal" in the old sense--if all you think about is the life that goes from your heart pumping to your fingertips, and nothing else, then that leads to death. We live, we die. If you have a spiritual life, God says, you cannot die--for something in you will live on, because it is not focused so tightly on the trappings of the physical realm.
Y'know, looked at a different way, that's actually a really cool statement--here's a god that lets atheists choose. Life eternal, if one thinks of terms like god and deity and spirit, or death and decay and dust, returning to the basic molecules, to nourish other things which focus on the flesh alone. That's kind of neat.
But I digress. The second passage is another one you really have to go back to the whole paragraph to really appreciate--and boy, is that one used out of context. That entire paragraph is basically God blackmailing people into worshipping him with brute threats--"You do a solid for me, you keep my holy days, you make your kids follow me, and I will reward you well. But anyone strays, anyone even LOOKS at another god, and you're all going to die."
And specifically, things will fall apart for those people in the lands beyond Jordan--so not only is this thuggish threats in the name of high-minded worship, but it's already passed by. These people are not our people; not our ways; and the original worship bargain no longer can apply.
Y'know, unless you live in Israel. Which most people in America really don't.
But there is another spirit being that Scripture calls the "god of this world" and "the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that now worketh in the children of disobedience." He is the antithesis of everything God is. He propagandizes and peddles evil by any and every means-making it alluring and glamorous, making it light and funny. He promotes the perverse. He exalts death. And he's dangerously good at what he does. Scripture also calls him "the great dragon … that old serpent, called the Devil, and Satan, which deceiveth the whole world."
Oh, here we go again, where Joel gets all hepped up and blames everything on Satan.
The only blood God tells us to "drink," symbolically, is that of Jesus Christ, which was spilled to pay for our sins. Jesus said, "Except ye eat the flesh of the Son of man, and drink his blood, ye have no life in you" (John 6:53). Is it any wonder the prince of the power of the air has inspired a twisted yet seductive counterfeit about immortals who must drink human blood to sustain their existence?
Who said anything about immortals? That's the fiction, Joel.
Evil is a drug. It gets its hooks into you. Paul compared it to slavery. It leads to death (Romans 6:16). Our society is saturated with it, obsessed with it. No shock, then, that it's increasingly obsessed with death. They go together.
Yeah, a lot of things lead to death. Drinking and driving. Old age. Genetic diseases. Big rocks falling on us. Seriously, now he's saying that only evil makes people die?
That's why God warns us not to even start down that road. Abhor what is evil--cleave to what is good, He tells us. Shun twisted death mythology. Think up, think positive. Whatever is true, think about that. Whatever is honorable, just, pure, lovely. If there is any excellence, anything worthy of praise, think about that.
Is it any great surprise that this drivel comes from a site devoted to the straggling survivors of the Worldwide Church of God, now subsumed into the Philadelphia Church of God, who publish The Trumpet? I mean, really, is anyone really shocked here?
Still. It irks me, it profoundly irks me. Because yet again, this is a case of missing the damned planet for the bark on the south side of one of the trees.
From The Trumpet comes this wonderful little gem:
Don't Even Think About It
From the January 2011 Trumpet Print Edition
The wretched world of werewolves, vampires and zombies
By Joel Hilliker
Think positive. This world is ugly--but don't become a cynic or a brooder. That's brilliant advice from one of history's spiritual giants, the Apostle Paul. "Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is gracious, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things," he wrote (Philippians 4:8; Revised Standard Version). It's one of the most helpful admonitions in Scripture about maintaining mental and spiritual health.
First, Paul was a raving bastard, a lunatic with an anti-gay, anti-woman agenda who was quite possibly homosexual himself; and I'm not saying that as a slam to him, I'm saying that from a reader of historical documents of the time. He doesn't come off as a 'spiritual giant', he comes off as a small, misanthropic, petty-minded blackmailer who twisted fundamentally what could have been an accepting, loving religion into the hate-filled, contradictory insanity it frequently is today.
The quote cited plays out remarkably accurately across several versions, but came at the end of a lengthy letter to the saved churchmen in Philippi, a town which was still torn between pagan and Christian ways. When this was originally written, Paul was most likely awaiting trial in Rome, and had sent this by messenger. Thus, it was in his best interests to laud and praise the Philippians, for hosting him earlier, feeding him well, and caring for him obsequiously in all ways.
I'm not saying that the letter, taken separately from his origins, is not among the most beautiful words ever put down in the Bible. They are strong, and paternal; they come across as the wise just father speaking to his beloved household. But paired with my understanding of the historical base of things, they're an orator's sham, sent solely to drum up support for him during his hour of need, as well as fostering acceptance of the rising Christian faith. And make no bones about it--he is speaking to the Philippian men without question, as well as speaking clearly to those saved souls numbering in the 140,000 that would go to heaven (presumedly leaving everyone else, including all women, in whatever occasionally revised place of damnation that was dreamt up).
Take a glance around, and you see a world dead set on thinking the polar opposite. Whatever is foul or crooked, whatever is unjust and impure, whatever is grotesque, whatever is hateful, if there is any degeneracy, anything barbaric and evil, anything worthy of condemnation, that is what people tend to think on.
The other night, after putting the kids to bed, I turned on the television. I walked to an adjoining room, which put the remote out of reach. Suddenly--at the same time one of my daughters emerged from her bedroom asking for a glass of water--an ad came on that showed four grotesque murders in about 10 seconds. "Do not look at the television!" I said, scrambling for the remote.
I have several problems with this. One: he had put his children to bed. Therefore, they shouldn't have gotten up; it was their lookout. But two: if he was that insanely concerned, then he needs to either stop watching television, or turn it off when he leaves the room. This is a no-brainer. This is stress for no reason. Plus, three--saying that? To any child? Virtually ENSURES they will look at the television! What is he, five?
This repulsive nightmare was meant to attract viewers to an upcoming program. Shows about bizarre, deviant acts and morbidly violent crimes dominate the airwaves.
That schlock fittingly symbolizes the terminal condition of our culture. As this sick world rots, people are increasingly fascinated with all things dead-and undead.
You’ve heard of Twilight, the series of books and movies about a love affair between a glamorous vampire and a gorgeous woman he must protect from a hunky werewolf. The books have sold over 100 million copies and been translated into 38 languages; the three films have raked in over $2 billion. "Box office gross" indeed.
To be fair, I can't stand Twilight, or any manifestation of it. I think it's crap writing, and I think it's a horrific tragedy that it's so popular. This speaks ill of both our level of education in this country and our level of critical thinking. It makes me sad.
But again, the outrage and the ire--come on, this is just a culture sitting around playing what-if! According to several Biblical accounts, the 'better times' of the ancient past actually featured zombies and demons! Plus an astounding lack of refrigeration. Trust me, it's better these days.
Adding in popular TV shows like HBO's True Blood and the CW Network's The Vampire Diaries, all told, vampire entertainment is now a $7 billion industry and growing. It's a world of glamor, romance and sex mingled with blood, violence and occultism. Millions of minds are marinating in this lurid material. Harmless escapism, most people say. I disagree. But no one can argue that in some few, it's having truly bizarre effects.
This is again where I say he's wrong. I say people have always done these aberrant things. Haitian zombies. The Salem Witch Trials. The Inquisition. The Crusades. And there are endless other examples.
I think what we're facing now is threefold:
1. There are more people now.
2. There is more connection now.
3. Word gets out faster.
Pair more people with more open channels of communication with faster speed of transmission, and what do you get? A world in which nearly everything that can be televised, aired, cabled, discussed, written about, read aloud, filmed, videoed, recorded, passed on, rumored, painted, sculpted, coded, or spoken, WILL BE. This is not new--just the methods of transmission and translation are.
A subculture of people who consider themselves real vampires is taking root and spreading. Joseph Laycock, author of Vampires Today: The Truth About Modern Vampirism, says these wackos either consume blood or believe they absorb life energy from people around them-and most think their physical, mental and emotional health will fade if they don't feed. Somebody please slap them.
Only if we get the right to slap Joel right back. Fair's fair.
Stupid teenagers are reportedly biting each other and licking or sucking each other"s blood. "These are kids who think they are real vampires," Dr. Orly Avitzur of the Consumers Union told an MSNBC reporter. One teen wrote on a vampire-themed website, "Having that thick, warm copper-tasting blood in my mouth is the best thing I can think of! Sometimes my boyfriend lets me feed off him. I let him feed off me as well."
Again, for the uninitiated: This is blood fetishism, not real vampirism. This is teens getting off on the shock value. This is life for the under-23 set. Kids are stupid. It happens. Some kids are too stupid, and get sick or die. This is called culling the herd. That also happens.
This passes for a hobby these days? Aside from it being sick, painful and disgusting, health officials say these kids are asking for nasty, even dangerous infections, and are liable to give each other blood-borne diseases like hepatitis and HIV. C'mon folks. Do you really have to be told not to do this?
And I really have to break down this paragraph. First: it's sick, painful and disgusting only to Joel, not to everyone. Second: Blood-borne diseases can only be spread if someone already has that disease, so if you're a teen with HIV, and you're offering your blood to be sucked, YOU have the problem here, not the person sucking on you. While yes, I would adore teachers with actual intelligence telling people it's not an automatic death sentence, but generally speaking, it's not the best idea without trust, understanding and good medical screening beforehand, I know that's not going to happen.
It was about this point, reading through this, that I started snickering out loud. "If there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things"--so much for that, Joel. You're luridly churning up the muck of your oft-cited degradation right along with us.
Another mind-boggling trend coming to an urban center near you is zombie walking. It started in California nine years ago and has spread, virus-like, to cities across America, Britain and Australia. Feeding off a booming film and television trend, multitudes-sometimes thousands strong-dress up like ghoulish reanimated corpses, spattered with blood, for a few hours of public moaning and foot-dragging, pretending to be on the hunt for human flesh. Parents bring their children and make it a family affair, and police close streets and provide escort.
He really is nuts. He's almost referring to this as a cult. A zombie cult. The true tragedy is, I think he's serious.
There is an explanation for all this nonsense. These modern amusements actually have evil roots that go back millennia.
God has seen it all. He knows the way to happiness. He is full of joy; He is love (Psalm 16:11; 1 John 4:8). He is light, and there is no hint of darkness in Him (1 John 1:5). He doesn't find wickedness the least entertaining, and He doesn't dismiss evil as harmless fun (e.g. Psalm 11:5; Proverbs 14:9).
From the Bible in Basic English: You will make clear to me the way of life; where you are joy is complete; in your right hand there are pleasures for ever and ever. I'm not saying that this is a bad concept, it's not. But it was, first and foremost, a prayer by David--I believe before he became King--to his God; a typical prayer that all things are made right by God, all things are blessed by God, all protection and safety come from God.
From the Complete Jewish Bible: Those who do not love, do not know God; because God is love. This is also pretty basic: if you do not understand love, in all its variety, you do not understand God. Which is fine as far as it goes, but Joel needs to know it goes a lot farther. If God is Love, in all its aspects, then God is groovy with the platonic love of nuns in church as well as the fellow who chains his wife in the basement and whips her until she squeals. If God is Love, in all aspects, then he's down with all things that lead to a happy heart.
ALL. THINGS. Which takes in quite a large part of this article--especially the things Joel is so outraged about.
From Douay-Rheims' Bible: And this is the declaration which we have heard from him and declare unto you: That God is light and in him there is no darkness. I think this is about the best translation found on the fly--a lot of Bibles use variants on some of the wording; this one remains pretty clear. But it's also obtuse, looked at another way, because earlier in the Bible it's said that God is all things, dark and light, bad and good--but now John says oh no, you didn't understand properly, God is light and GOOD and you really need to GET that.
Of course, John was something of a raving lunatic as well, so...
As far as Psalm 11:5, that one goes all over the place. Examples:
The Bible in Basic English: The Lord puts the upright and the sinner to the test, but he has hate in his soul for the lover of violent acts.
The Complete Jewish Bible: Adonai tests the righteous; but he hates the wicked and the lover of violence.
The Holman Christian Standard: The Lord examines the righteous and the wicked. He hates the lover of violence.
New Century Bible: The Lord tests those who do right, but he hates the wicked and those who love to hurt others.
So, in brief (not possible at this point): God hates. That's a bad thing, right there. But pushing past that--the basic gist seems to be that God will judge everyone, the wicked and the pure alike, but those who commit violent acts, God will not be kind with. Because God hates violence.
Which, y'know, considering this is the guy who spent most of the Old Testament randomly killing people, is hypocrisy on a truly grand scale, but even if we don't go there, wau, this puts Christians who shoot abortion doctors in a bad light, doesn't it? I mean, forget the guys behind 9/11; God's out to take down every man who hits a woman, hits a child. Every person who fights in a bar. Every soldier. Everyone who gets angry and strikes out.
How is any of that, though, "doesn't find wickedness the least entertaining"?
Which brings us to Proverbs 14:9:
The Bible in Basic English again: In the tents of those hating authority there is error, but in the house of the upright man there is grace.
Douay-Rheims: A fool will laugh at sin, but among the just grace shall abide.
The Good News translation: Foolish people don't care if they sin, but good people want to be forgiven.
Wau, is there variety on this one. If we back up to that whole Psalm, we see it's pretty much a series of either/or, yes/no statements. (It also contains one of my favorite lines in the entire Bible, Psalm 14:13, Even in laughter the heart may ache, and joy may end in grief.) But even if we're taking that one--extremely variably translated--line out of context from the rest of the psalm--it still doesn't mean what Joel thinks it means.
God forbids us to consume blood (e.g. Leviticus 17:10; Acts 15:20), or to practice occultism and witchcraft, with which it is often paired, as in vampire lore (Leviticus 19:26).
Point the first. Leviticus, entirely, was a book for Israel's priests, so they would know and remember the special adherences for God's chosen worship. It wasn't intended for lay people, ever.
But okay, say you don't buy that. Say you say Leviticus is part of the entire Bible. Then let me hit you with the actual verse from the Complete Jewish Bible:
When someone from the community of Isra'el or one of the foreigners living with you eats any kind of blood, I will set myself against that person who eats blood and cut him off from his people.
That? That right there? Says to me "Vampires: don't drink blood in Israel. I don't like it. Jews: you're my people. Don't drink blood, period."
Fine. Makes sense to me. God's a jealous god, fine, he doesn't like people drinking blood, because the blood is the life and he's still all crazy that we're going to end up immortal and challenge him, or something...and that's fine, he's allowed to be crazed on this issue. How'ver, that still doesn't mean everyone, everywhere, is banned from the practice. Just Jewish priests. Or, if you really want to extend it. Jews, priests, and Israelites, whether Jewish or not.
Everyone else? Off the hook. Get over yourself, Joel.
Acts is even worse. This is from the Bible in Basic English:
But that we give them orders to keep themselves from things offered to false gods, and from the evil desires of the body, and from the flesh of animals put to death in ways against the law, and from blood.
This was a direct challenge to other priests in the area. Point one: God's priests are telling people that eating of things sacrificed to other gods is wrong; not just that other gods are wrong, but that any food sacrificed to that god or gods, or shared with the congregation in ceremony to other gods, was somehow evil or wrong. This is religious double-talk, equal in all ways with "Oh, Mithras? Yeah, we call him Jesus. We worship on the same day just like you do."
Second, the other religions in the area featured holy prostitutes, and priests who were anything but chaste. This was another way to markedly separate from the other religions--saying that your god said their god asked them to do bad things. The strangling thing is hardly an issue now, and that's assuming everyday people know exactly how their food animals came to the table--most people don't.
And if you go back to the whole passage of Acts that comes from? It's all a dodge for Paul to get around getting circumcised, because he was being a big baby about it. How is that passage relevant to anything in the rest of this article?!?
He is a God of life. "[T]o be carnally minded is death; but to be spiritually minded is life and peace" (Romans 8:6). In ancient priestly law, God forbade even touching a dead body. "I have set before you life and death," He says in Deuteronomy 30:19--"therefore choose life, that both thou and thy seed may live."
Brother. Not even touching the dead? First, that establishes a dangerous disconnection with the fact that we are born, we die, we live in between--the signs of which pervade Western societies, in sad and sometimes tragically bizarre ways.
But second, the Deuteronomy passage is nothing about sex--it's "carnal" in the old sense--if all you think about is the life that goes from your heart pumping to your fingertips, and nothing else, then that leads to death. We live, we die. If you have a spiritual life, God says, you cannot die--for something in you will live on, because it is not focused so tightly on the trappings of the physical realm.
Y'know, looked at a different way, that's actually a really cool statement--here's a god that lets atheists choose. Life eternal, if one thinks of terms like god and deity and spirit, or death and decay and dust, returning to the basic molecules, to nourish other things which focus on the flesh alone. That's kind of neat.
But I digress. The second passage is another one you really have to go back to the whole paragraph to really appreciate--and boy, is that one used out of context. That entire paragraph is basically God blackmailing people into worshipping him with brute threats--"You do a solid for me, you keep my holy days, you make your kids follow me, and I will reward you well. But anyone strays, anyone even LOOKS at another god, and you're all going to die."
And specifically, things will fall apart for those people in the lands beyond Jordan--so not only is this thuggish threats in the name of high-minded worship, but it's already passed by. These people are not our people; not our ways; and the original worship bargain no longer can apply.
Y'know, unless you live in Israel. Which most people in America really don't.
But there is another spirit being that Scripture calls the "god of this world" and "the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that now worketh in the children of disobedience." He is the antithesis of everything God is. He propagandizes and peddles evil by any and every means-making it alluring and glamorous, making it light and funny. He promotes the perverse. He exalts death. And he's dangerously good at what he does. Scripture also calls him "the great dragon … that old serpent, called the Devil, and Satan, which deceiveth the whole world."
Oh, here we go again, where Joel gets all hepped up and blames everything on Satan.
The only blood God tells us to "drink," symbolically, is that of Jesus Christ, which was spilled to pay for our sins. Jesus said, "Except ye eat the flesh of the Son of man, and drink his blood, ye have no life in you" (John 6:53). Is it any wonder the prince of the power of the air has inspired a twisted yet seductive counterfeit about immortals who must drink human blood to sustain their existence?
Who said anything about immortals? That's the fiction, Joel.
Evil is a drug. It gets its hooks into you. Paul compared it to slavery. It leads to death (Romans 6:16). Our society is saturated with it, obsessed with it. No shock, then, that it's increasingly obsessed with death. They go together.
Yeah, a lot of things lead to death. Drinking and driving. Old age. Genetic diseases. Big rocks falling on us. Seriously, now he's saying that only evil makes people die?
That's why God warns us not to even start down that road. Abhor what is evil--cleave to what is good, He tells us. Shun twisted death mythology. Think up, think positive. Whatever is true, think about that. Whatever is honorable, just, pure, lovely. If there is any excellence, anything worthy of praise, think about that.
Is it any great surprise that this drivel comes from a site devoted to the straggling survivors of the Worldwide Church of God, now subsumed into the Philadelphia Church of God, who publish The Trumpet? I mean, really, is anyone really shocked here?
Still. It irks me, it profoundly irks me. Because yet again, this is a case of missing the damned planet for the bark on the south side of one of the trees.