you do what you have to do

[nematoddity]

Yeah, Sarah McLachlan's been on repeat, off and on. It's gonna happen.

Free Geek won the Spirit of Portland award! It's sitting on the desk up front. The woman standing next to the Mayor, btw, directed the Free Geek movie, a five-minute clip of which can be seen on YouTubeSo I'm in a weird position. There's a higher likelihood of my Second

Comments

[nice_girls_play]

But lay off the bi chicklet, already. Yeah, I date a lot of guys. Bi girls do. We're not just "dykes until the right man comes along", though. Give it. The hell. Up.

Thank you! Sometimes I feel like I should have cards printed up with that written on it to hand them out to all the jerk-offs I meet in RL. My ex-fiance included.

[nematoddity]

Yep.

I've had stages where I've dated predominantly men. I've ALSO had stages where I've dated predominantly WOMEN. I've most FREQUENTLY had stages where the gender was immaterial, it was the PERSON inside the skin I liked and wanted.

People don't get it.

[nice_girls_play]

No they don't. I'm still dealing with this shit, but the worst for me was when I was engaged. I had my best straight girl friend tell me I was straight because I was marrying Tony and had therefore "chosen" my gender preference. I had the vice president of our school's PRIDE organization tell me he would classify me as a "straight girl with gay tendencies" because I'd primarily dated men at that time. Even as recently as a month ago, I had another friend grilling me over lunch about whether "choosing to be with someone" and "choosing a gender" wasn't the same thing.

I think people are threatened by it in a way.. If that girl can fall in love with another girl even though she primarily dates men.. could that happen to *me*??

[nematoddity]

Which is annoying, because it happens on both sides. If a guy can fall in love with a guy, not a girl....all hell breaks loose. Their heads cave in, they can't cope.

[nice_girls_play]

No they can't. Which is why it's much easier for them to label us as "greedy", "indecisive" or "confused" than to accept the slightest possibility of their own sexual fluidity.

Oddly enough, I've noticed a certain consistency in who gets labelled what. Two of my closest friends at college were polyamorous as well as bi, so they each got labelled as "greedy" by people in our own PRIDE group. Me, I haven't had a lot of sex, haven't dated too many people that seriously and still believe in "love first," so I get branded as "confused."