ass over teakettle
I went to my daughter's playgroup this morning like a good little mommy. Things went very well, and I prepared to leave. I took a back stairway down to a back door to get out to the parking lot. Another mom was in front of me with her kids, and then...
BAM!
Oh, FUCK. (I said in my head). Out loud, I yelled "Ow!" and landed in a heap on the floor (not a very pretty one, either). The other mom turned back in complete alarm and was all, "What happened??" I missed the effing step (I said in my head). Out loud, I told her I fell. And like the old lady in those medic alert commercials, I couldn't get up. I had rolled my left ankle to such a degree I thought it might be broken. My daughter was absolutely terrified that mommy was in such pain, so I tried to tell her I was ok while also trying not to cry. One of the other mommies was a nurse, and she came down to check on me. She thought it wasn't broken, but deemed it necessary to call 911 and let the local hospital handle it. Oh, fuck.
So after a frantic phone call to my father to come get my daughter and pick my son up from school, I was loaded onto an ambulance and tried not to have a nervous breakdown. I got to the hospital, they took x-rays, and after and hour or so of waiting, they told me it wasn't broken. However: I have sprained the hell out of it, so I got an air cast, crutches, and a nice prescription for Vicodin for the pain.
My name is not, nor will it never be, Grace. I am such an ass.
BAM!
Oh, FUCK. (I said in my head). Out loud, I yelled "Ow!" and landed in a heap on the floor (not a very pretty one, either). The other mom turned back in complete alarm and was all, "What happened??" I missed the effing step (I said in my head). Out loud, I told her I fell. And like the old lady in those medic alert commercials, I couldn't get up. I had rolled my left ankle to such a degree I thought it might be broken. My daughter was absolutely terrified that mommy was in such pain, so I tried to tell her I was ok while also trying not to cry. One of the other mommies was a nurse, and she came down to check on me. She thought it wasn't broken, but deemed it necessary to call 911 and let the local hospital handle it. Oh, fuck.
So after a frantic phone call to my father to come get my daughter and pick my son up from school, I was loaded onto an ambulance and tried not to have a nervous breakdown. I got to the hospital, they took x-rays, and after and hour or so of waiting, they told me it wasn't broken. However: I have sprained the hell out of it, so I got an air cast, crutches, and a nice prescription for Vicodin for the pain.
My name is not, nor will it never be, Grace. I am such an ass.