(no subject)
So yet again I open this up to write, then go to youtube and get sidetracked. Saw a video that made me cry from laughing so hard, and mind you its like 330am...hope i wasn't too loud but lmfao...ahhhh
Felt good to actually laugh for once. Not many things to really laugh at in this world. Well there is, but I'd usually laugh at the stupidity of it. Over the years I seem to have been 'hardened' so to speak. No, I'm not serious all the time, just most... haven't really had the opportunity to just let go really.
I had the strangest feeling not too long ago, I'd say somewhere around 2 or 230am, roughly an hour ago. Something felt off, like it wasn't quite right. As if something happened, and I somehow got wind of it...but through a feeling. You could say its a gut feeling, like what I had mentioned a few entries ago. My heart sank, so technically it's not a 'gut' feeling, but roughly fits in the same category. Hmmm. I'm overcome by a sadness; a sadness that is not my own, I can't really describe it. It did, however, come out of nowhere. I've had similar feelings in the past, but this one just felt different.
It's gone now, so whatever it is should be over.
I spent a good majority of my 'bedtime' last night just laying and thinking. Just trying to see if I could put any puzzle pieces back in their places. At least start with the borders as it's easier to complete a puzzle that way...but puzzles usually tend to come with a missing piece...
Not to mention I don't have the box cover as a reference point. Needless to say, I didn't get very far. Where would I really begin though? I feel as if my change has been for the better....but whose to really say. This could all be entirely....bad. I highly doubt that...not like anyone has told me 'you've changed...i dont like it' or 'you've changed, i like it'. Not that anyone would, people are usually oblivious to such things.
And for some reason, just completely out of the blue, I feel as if I need to talk about me being quiet, assertive and shy. Once again I feel compelled. Not like it really matters but whatever, I shall humor myself.
Me being shy....I have always wondered that, and honestly I don't really know why. It's just who I am. I'm quiet for the same reason. I couldn't imagine myself being an extrovert....even if I was the same guy, same personality and everything, but to just be so outgoing...I honestly can't see that being a good thing. The way I see it, is if someone is willing to take the time and get past the shyness and quiet, they deserve to know me. If people only knew....very few have taken the opportunity.
And I feel very lonely. I've felt lonely for quite some time, and it feel more lonely with each passing day. The loneliness I feel could possibly account for the lack of people in my dreams.
Anyways I think I shall go cuddle with my pillow or something. Au revoir
Felt good to actually laugh for once. Not many things to really laugh at in this world. Well there is, but I'd usually laugh at the stupidity of it. Over the years I seem to have been 'hardened' so to speak. No, I'm not serious all the time, just most... haven't really had the opportunity to just let go really.
I had the strangest feeling not too long ago, I'd say somewhere around 2 or 230am, roughly an hour ago. Something felt off, like it wasn't quite right. As if something happened, and I somehow got wind of it...but through a feeling. You could say its a gut feeling, like what I had mentioned a few entries ago. My heart sank, so technically it's not a 'gut' feeling, but roughly fits in the same category. Hmmm. I'm overcome by a sadness; a sadness that is not my own, I can't really describe it. It did, however, come out of nowhere. I've had similar feelings in the past, but this one just felt different.
It's gone now, so whatever it is should be over.
I spent a good majority of my 'bedtime' last night just laying and thinking. Just trying to see if I could put any puzzle pieces back in their places. At least start with the borders as it's easier to complete a puzzle that way...but puzzles usually tend to come with a missing piece...
Not to mention I don't have the box cover as a reference point. Needless to say, I didn't get very far. Where would I really begin though? I feel as if my change has been for the better....but whose to really say. This could all be entirely....bad. I highly doubt that...not like anyone has told me 'you've changed...i dont like it' or 'you've changed, i like it'. Not that anyone would, people are usually oblivious to such things.
And for some reason, just completely out of the blue, I feel as if I need to talk about me being quiet, assertive and shy. Once again I feel compelled. Not like it really matters but whatever, I shall humor myself.
Me being shy....I have always wondered that, and honestly I don't really know why. It's just who I am. I'm quiet for the same reason. I couldn't imagine myself being an extrovert....even if I was the same guy, same personality and everything, but to just be so outgoing...I honestly can't see that being a good thing. The way I see it, is if someone is willing to take the time and get past the shyness and quiet, they deserve to know me. If people only knew....very few have taken the opportunity.
And I feel very lonely. I've felt lonely for quite some time, and it feel more lonely with each passing day. The loneliness I feel could possibly account for the lack of people in my dreams.
Anyways I think I shall go cuddle with my pillow or something. Au revoir